Anorak News | Britney Spears – Nil By North & South

Britney Spears – Nil By North & South

by | 15th, March 2007

britney-nil-by-north-and-south.jpgBRITNEY Spears does not do things by half.

As the Enquirer reports. Britney is “BATTLING THREE DISEASES.”

We could engage you in a game of guess the diseases, producing a list of injuries, disabilities, disorders, syndromes, infections, symptoms and deviant behaviours. Guess right and win a lock of Britney’s old hair. Guess wrong and win two locks.

But to do so would be a waste time. We need the diagnoses and we need them fast.

This is “The TRUTH ABOUT POOR BRITNEY”. In no particular order the diseases are, as reported: Postpartum depression, Bipolar Disorder and Bulimia

Might it be that all three diseases are symptoms of Britney’s troubled mind? The bipolar condition is the celebrity illness du jour, what AIDs was in the 1980s.

The better news for Britney is that she is currently residing in Promises rehab centre, Malibu. As the Enquirer says, finally she and her loved ones are coming to terms with her “meltdown”.

Unnamed sources tell the Enquirer that Britney may have been bipolar when she was 15, back when bi-polar was known by the less socially acceptable nosology manic depression.

Another unnamed source tells us of life behind the rubberised walls of rehab. “She has been making herself throw up while in the rehab centre,” says the source. “She is on medication for bipolar disorder, but the pills are not staying in her system because she is bulimic and is throwing them up before they can help her.”

And on top of this the Enquirer throws up the postnatal depression.

It is, is it not, depressing stuff…

Posted: 15th, March 2007 | In: Reviews Comment | TrackBack | Permalink