Anorak News | Arrest The Gollywogs

Arrest The Gollywogs

by | 16th, March 2007

golliwog.jpgTWO black males are acting suspiciously. One is 6ft tall.

Seen hanging around In Touch, a shop in the centre of Writhington, Lancashire, the call has gone out.

Boots on cobbles. Knocks on doors. Boots in shop. Arrests. Questions.

The black figures are taken away by the police.

“Surely the police have got more important things to do,” says shop owner Gavin Alexander in the Mail. “It’s cases like this that cause racism.”

Indeed. What crimes have these black figures been accused of? DWB (driving while black)? Being black in a quaint village setting? Resisting arrest?

And do not doubt these gollywogs have caused offence. And this is not our word, but the word on the street and the word in the shop. The two golly rag dolls have been upsetting shoppers.

They will have to be removed. Police have taken a statement from the shop’s owner. He is instructed to remove these items from sale. The days of slavery are long gone. The golly on the keyring is as anachronistic as it is wrong.

But then a reprieve. The police say no offence has been committed. As you were. The gollywogs can go back on sale.

And the police force’s sexual relations unit drag Barbie flicking and screaming to the van…

Posted: 16th, March 2007 | In: Tabloids Comments (2) | TrackBack | Permalink