Katee Holmes: A Porno Tribute To Katie Holmes
POOR Katie Holmes. First Tom. Then Scientology. And now the ultimate insult. Porn.
Not that Katie is stripping off. Oh no. Instead her name has been commandeered by an 18-year-old aspiring porn star who intends to make her debut by losing her virginity on film under the stage name ‘Katee Holmes’.
Katie is said to be fuming, and threatening to take her virginal namesake to court. Meanwhile, we are sure Tom’s pals at the Church of Scientology will be able to lend some of their considerable resources to make the girl’s life hell.
A photo of Katee appears to be under wraps at the moment. But her agent, Shy Love, told the New York Post she is a 5-foot-9, 122-pound small town girl from Illinois, “with a perky pair of A-cup breasts that are far too perfect to have been constructed by any doctor.”
Love goes on to claim that chaste Katee is so pure she hasn’t even been kissed, and that she is going to start her out with a girl/girl encounter. She says she has taken the Katee: “as a tribute to Katie, who has always portrayed an innocence in everything she’s done, beginning with ‘Dawson’s Creek.’ ”
What a tribute!
Katee says: “I know it’s pretty extreme to lose my virginity on camera, but I like the fulfillment and excitement I get from watching porn, so I figured [a movie] was the best place for me to lose it.
“How many people wished they could relive their first experience, if not to remember it but to learn from it, right?”
Which all sounds like a complete load of BS. But hey who cares? If it pisses off TomKat, it’s fine by us.
Posted: 22nd, May 2007 | In: Reviews Comments (11) | TrackBack | Permalink
