Anorak News | Paris Hilton Remains In The Project Until Her Work Is Done

Paris Hilton Remains In The Project Until Her Work Is Done

by | 14th, June 2007

paris-hilton.jpgNEVER knowing where truth and fiction diverge is part of the Hollywood dream.

The latest exponent of the Tinsel Town tale is the star of this summer’s Hollywood blockbuster is Paris Hilton.

Paris has been in and out and back into jail. And now the story of why she came out of jail the first time occupies the Enquirer’s mind.

Very soon we expect to read that Paris is a champion of the oppressed. Thanks to her hissy fit and tears, the greater world learned of the terrible hardships and unfairness of jail.

“How can it be right that I was let out – a blonde, white women with rampant animal magnetism and a killer lags – when those poor overweight black women were not?

“Thanks to me this injustice is righted and never again will a ravishing and not at all scrawny socialite with millions of fans the world over and more talent in the tip of her little finger than many have in their 300lb frames (you know who you are, Nicole Richie) be given preferential treatment.”

All hail Paris Hilton champion of equality. And all wonder at her acting ability.

Of course, Paris was not really going into meltdown in that 12-by-8-foot jail cell. She was not really crying all day. She was, as some believe, and the Enquirer reports, “simulating a mini nervous break down”.

Paris was acting. Just like she was acting in House of Wax, only much better. Those tears were false. What did she use to prick them, the edge of her metal bed or the thought of Lindsay Lohan bagging those heels in that shop?

This is a very sophisticated ploy. At once sad, pathetic Paris becomes clever and talented Paris. How glad was Paris that she’d seen the Shawshank Redemption, Ernest Goes To Jail and She Wolf of The SS.

Paris had not been wasting her time shopping and hanging out at parties. She’d been researching life behind bars.

And now incarcerated she was able to put her Plan A into action. The tears came and she was released.

Paris is now back in choky, or immersed in her project, as it must now be known…

Posted: 14th, June 2007 | In: Uncategorized Comments (2) | TrackBack | Permalink