Anorak News | Went The Day Well: Migrants See A New Way Into The UK

Went The Day Well: Migrants See A New Way Into The UK

by | 5th, September 2007

angrywoman.jpg“MIGRANTS FIND NEW WAY INTO BRITAIN,” says the Express.

Desperation is indeed the mother of invention and we read on with interest. We have witnessed immigrants journeying across the seas on li-los, walking through the Chunnel and inviting Brits to touch their bum on Pop Idol.

What new way can be left untapped?

The Express investigates and sees “thousands of illegal immigrants”. The mob was “last night queuing to sneak into Britain”.

That’s right. The new way in is to stand in line and wait your turn.

That they should adapt so readily to British mores that have taken millennia to hone is a testament to their cunning.

Minds turn to the film Went The Day Well in which a group of British soldiers arrive in the small, fictitious English village of Bramley End. Only they are German and set about slaughtering the Home Guard and taking over the village.

And like the war back then, today’s French occupy and ambiguous position.

The Express reveals that officials in France are helping the immigrants arrive here. “French politicians are plotting to build a new Sangatte-style camp in the port of Cherbourg in north-west France,” says the Express.

In readiness, “scores of refugees” are heading for the hills overlooking the docks. “The makeshift camp makes an ideal vantage point to observe ferries that could take them across the Chanelle to start a new life in Britain.”

So the new way in is for migrants to wait in line and then hitch a ride on lorries…

It’s not exactly innovative, and we were looking for more invention involving forged documents, giant gliders with wings made from rice paper and YouTube videos of young desperadoes weaving mazy runs with footballs glued to their feet.

This the land of Berners-Lee, Whittle and Gascoigne…

Posted: 5th, September 2007 | In: Tabloids Comment | TrackBack | Permalink