Anorak News | Britney Spears Loses Children: She Too Is Lost

Britney Spears Loses Children: She Too Is Lost

by | 2nd, October 2007

“BRITNEY LOSES KIDS,” announces the Sun’s front page. And we fear it has happened again.

“Britney loses her children,” says the Mirror, and we know that it has.

But the panic does not last for long as the Sun tells us that the children have been found and are now in the “physical custody” of Britney Spears’ ex-husband Kevin Federline.

Federline, aka The Rapping Rodent, aka K-Ferret, is now legally allowed to raise sons Sean Preston and Jayden James, to construct them in his own image.

Many will have to put their concerns to one side, dismiss thoughts of the little lambs being at large dressed in white vests and pointed beards, because, as a source says: “We are all fearing for Britney and this will be the final straw for her.”

“SUICIDE FEAR FOR BRITNEY,” says the Sun. The Mirror says Britney is “beyond inconsolable”.

And: “She has not stopped crying since she found out. It hasn’t sunk in yet…a life without them is unimaginable for her.” As ever: “The boys are her life.”

Overlooked is the need to say that Britney is lost. And realise that this is an interim order and full custody of the children will be decided at a later date.

In the meantime, we need to find Britney. And find her spokesman, who, as the Sun reports, “was not available last night”.

Fears are that they too are lost…

Posted: 2nd, October 2007 | In: Celebrities, Tabloids Comments (7) | TrackBack | Permalink