Cher Tightens Chastity’s Belt

YOU can pick your friends. In Hollywood you can pick your teeth, your nose and even your buttocks.

And as Angelina Jolie and Madonna have shown, you can even pick your children.

But you cannot control how things will turn out. Teeth blacken. Hair plugs shrink. Children fill out.

And on first sight a person here at Anorak Towers did observe Cher’s statuesque daughter and opine “So that’s what she did with the spare bits”.

The Enquirer observes that Chastity weighs 23st 3lbs, “the same weight as the average female grizzly bear”, also called Chastity.

Says a source: “Cher loves Chas and wants to save her from digging her own grave with a knife and fork.”

We could say that the exercise would do her good. It would be no small thing to excavate an area large enough to encase the Cher offspring.

But we return to our original premise about celebrities picking things they hope best reflect them. And how not everything can be controlled…

Anorak