Anorak News | Bounty Bar: National Enquirer Overlooks Dog The Bounty Hunter

Bounty Bar: National Enquirer Overlooks Dog The Bounty Hunter

by | 28th, December 2007

dog-hunter.jpgTHE National Enquirer “Scandals of 2007” finds no space for Duane ‘Dog’ Chapman, known to tens of satellite TV viewers as Dog The Bounty Hunter.

Dog, who resembles a flayed and boiled Dr Zaius, from Planet of the Apes, makes a living chasing bad guys down in his oversized truck while in the company of his progeny and his separated-at-birth wife Beth.

Dog apologized for his transgression. His son had taped his dad telling him to stop dating a black girl, because she was a “f***ing n***er”. The boy sold the recording for a reported $15,000 to the Enquirer, which now overlooks the incident.

As the storm broke, Dog issued one of the best apologies of all time: “I thought that I was cool enough in the black world to be able to use that word as a brother to a brother. I’m not. I didn’t really know until three or four days ago what that meant to black people.”

Dog is so cool with black people he calls them all niggers. It’s not his fault, you see. His words are taken out of context. Had the tape rolled on we would have heard Dog call not only his son’s girlfriend a “fucking nigger” but his black friends too. The Dog does not discriminate.

He went on, mewling like a scalded sharpei: “There’s a special connection that I thought I had between me and black America. And I used to say, ‘I’m black, too.’

“In other words, my whole life I’ve been called a half-breed, a convict, king of the trailer trash, this and that…so when I stood there and said, ‘I kind of know what you feel like, because I’ve been there, too,’ that I felt that I could embrace and like, as brothers…say the word.”

The Dog dares to empathise. Bounty hunter: Bounty bar – black on the outside and white within.

drzaius.jpg “I now learned I’m not black at all, and I never did it out of hate. This sounds so stupid. I always did it out of love. Other white guys would be like, ‘Boy, who does Dog think he is? Dog can say that.’ And black guys would be with me and walk with me and respect me.”

And TV producers would take his show off the air and the Enquirer would forget to include him in its review of the year…And, no, it is not because he is black…

Posted: 28th, December 2007 | In: Celebrities, National Enquirer Comments (14) | TrackBack | Permalink