Anorak News | Paris Hilton Flies To Mexico

Paris Hilton Flies To Mexico

by | 1st, May 2009

paris-hilton-crab-fluPARIS Hilton has been “studying” swine flu.

How can only be best-guessed at, but rumours are that she’s discovered the Charlotte’s Web Code and been asking friends if she’d look better with a turned-up nose.

Of course, swine flu is going to kill us all, just like the Ebola virus did, bird flu did, SARS did…

Asked if she was concerned about the outbreak that has killed dozens in Mexico, Hilton said, “I don’t eat that.”

As one TMZ staffer opined:

“It’s low on the list of diseases Paris has to contend with.”

And where Paris leads, others follow.

Egyptian leaders ordered the slaughter of hundreds of thousands of pigs today to help protect against swine flu, prompting angry protests from the poor Christian farmers who feed their animals with a country’s food scraps. The decision was also criticised as a “real mistake” by a senior UN food expert.

Had only Paris said swine flu could not be caught by eating pork, this would not have occurred. She should not underestimate the power of her celebrity.

Iraq will kill three wild boars in Baghdad Zoo to ward off the new flu sweeping the globe, officials said, despite experts’ advice that people are spreading the virus, not pigs.

Until she can be controlled, we advise Paris to do as her nation’s VeePee Joe Biden orders and go and sit in the middle of a big empty field and take up sneezing…

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Posted: 1st, May 2009 | In: Celebrities, Photojournalism Comment | TrackBack | Permalink