Anorak News | Swine Flu Fever Killing British Business

Swine Flu Fever Killing British Business

by | 2nd, May 2009

swine-flu-strepsilsSWINE flu is leading to Swine Flu Fever, says the Daily Mail:

Thousands of people are using the swine flu crisis as an excuse to take a sickie, employers claimed last night.

Flu-related absences have soared almost 20 per cent and experts believe the number will rise substantially after the bank holiday weekend – costing employers millions.

No figures, but it is all true.

Meanwhile the World Health Organisation said there has not yet been a sustained spread of H1N1 outside North America, but a pandemic is still ‘imminent’.

So swine flu is a scam to get off work? No-one’s got it, not really:.

“I can’t come into work today – oink-oink! – I’ve got – Squeeel! – a runny snout…

In other Daily Mail news:

‘The smell is so awful that I start to vomit’: Is this farm the Ground Zero of swine flu?

Thousands will die! It’s war with the pigs!

There will be about 1,700 U.S. cases of the new H1N1 flu, aka “swine flu,” in the next four weeks under a worst-case scenario, according to a research team’s new simulations.

And a second team working independently, about 200 miles away, on exactly the same question came up with a similar forecast.

So not as many will die as when the Twin Tower were attacked? And as Tim Blair says:

Swine flu has killed more people than have been killed by global warming. Which is to say, more than none.

Is it safe to panic about something else yet?

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Swine Flu Pandemic In Pictures
Swine Flu Hits American Idol
Swine Flu Sourced In The Industrial Feacal Mire
Peta Renames Swine Flu Veal Flu
Swine Flu Outbreak In London
Swine Flu Source Found
Pig Flu Linked To Cancer
Susan Boyle “Beaten Down By Swine Flu”
Obama Came Into Contact With Suspected Pig Flu
Jonathan Ross Linked To Pig Flu

Posted: 2nd, May 2009 | In: Reviews Comment | TrackBack | Permalink