Anorak

Anorak News | Katie Price Beats Britney Spears And Suri Cruise To Media Award

Katie Price Beats Britney Spears And Suri Cruise To Media Award

by | 29th, December 2009

Joan Collins and the Daily Mail find a way to namecheck Peter Andre, Katie Price, Big Brother, Jade Goody, Peter Andre, Kerry Katona, Dannii Minogue, the X Factor, Britney Spears, Suri Cruise and just about any other celebrity you want to read about…

A TRULY brilliant story on the Mail’s front page, as it uses a picture of Katie Price to highlight its, er, “NONENTITIES” awards.

Yep. Katie Price is such a nonentity she is now reduced to appearing on the Mail’s front page. Even the Daily Star doesn’t bother with her, leading instead with Umar Abdulmutallab and the war on terror.

Taking Mail readers through the “decade when nonentities – not fit to kiss the feet of icons like Liz [Taylor] – were hailed as stars” is Joan Collins.

This is Joan Collins as seen over Christmas in All Star Mr & Mrs Special, alongside Emma Bunton and her Mr, Jade Jones from Damage, who said he’d prefer Emma Spice to have Mel B’s bum over Victoria Beckham’s chest. It’s “The rise of the sub-lebrity: The non-entities of the Noughties awards”, presented by Mrs Collins.

Just what has happened to real celebrity? I don’t mean the ‘sub-lebrity’ we have today.

It went on a show starting with “All Star…”. The rest of the celebrity world, people like Liz Taylor, didn’t.

Where are the Marilyn Monroes, the Elizabeth Taylors, the Richard Burtons and the Jackie Kennedy Onassises?

Three of them are dead and Taylor was last seen talking to her fans on Twitter.

But the saddest part about our obsession with sub-lebrities is that so many young girls strive to emulate them. If Britney falls down and is sick in the gutter, then too many young girls seem to think that if it’s OK for her, it’s OK for them, too.

So here’s Joan playing a nymphomaniac adulterer in The Stud, getting shagged in a lift, and again in The Bitch. Play along at home.

It all goes on and on, so allowing time and space for Joan Collins to be seen in the Mail thanks to her repeated mentions of Katie Price, Kerry Katona, Jade Goody, Big Brother and just about any other celebrity Mail readers are interested in.

This Moan Collins piece ends with the awards, which go to Katie Price, Peter Andre, Dannii Minogue, a child called Suri Cruise, Jude Law, Sienna Miller, George Michael, Cheryl Cole and just about anyone else sure to attract more readers to the Mail’s celebrity paper and website than Joan Collins…

joancollin_0

Picture 1 of 90



Posted: 29th, December 2009 | In: Celebrities, Key Posts Comment | TrackBack | Permalink