Anorak News | The Search For A Right-Wing Villain – An Iowahawk Reality TV Special

The Search For A Right-Wing Villain – An Iowahawk Reality TV Special

by | 14th, September 2010

FROM Allahpundit comes late breaking Washington showbiz news that another slasher flick fromWhite HouseSulzbergerCBS Narrative Films has landed with a thud at the box office. As a result the studio will drop promising newcomer villain John Boehner and greenlight a big budget sequel starring – wait for it – Sarah Palin, Glenn Beck, and Rush Limbaugh, writs Iowahawk.

More than anything, what really chaps my hide about this development is the lack of imagination. Why should these same boring overexposed studio “stars” get to hog all the limelight, when there are tens of millions of undiscovered amateur right wingers out here with the raw talent to become America’s Next Top Media Scare Figure?

In fact I’d wager there’s plenty of ’em right here at Iowahawk – maybe even you! All you need is that big break, like Susan Boyle or William Hung. That’s why I’m opening up the comment section on this post to let you showcase your talent. Are you secretly a nexus between two extremist paramilitary organizations, like the Rotary and Shriners? Have a grotesque tan or flat nasal Midwestern twang or a suspiciously large number of children? Lack a plumber’s license? Then you just might have what it takes to become a goverment-media complex Two-Minute-Hatebiz superstar!

Please keep your audition to 100 words or less. Our expert panel of judges will carefully review each performance against the critical “4 Ps”:

  • Poise
  • Posture
  • Perkiness
  • Provokes Progressive Apoplexy

I know you’ve got it in you, folks – show those suits at CNN and the West Wing you are ready to be demonized as the villanous avatar of Middle America’s depraved violent stupidity!*

*Deadline Sept 18, 2010. Eligibility: entries open to all US resident villains over the age of 2. Employees of ABC, NBC, CBS, MSNBC, Newsweek, Time, Tribune Company, NPR, PBS, CNN, Washington Post, New York Times or other White House subsidiaries and their immediate families are ineligible. All entries become the property of Iowahawk Ventures LLC. Winners agree to assign 10% of all Regnery book deals or villain appearances to David R. Burge. Don’t Call Us, We’ll Call You.

Posted: 14th, September 2010 | In: TV & Radio Comment | TrackBack | Permalink