Anorak News | Daily Mail proves that Global Warming is a thing of the past, which is nice

Daily Mail proves that Global Warming is a thing of the past, which is nice

by | 15th, October 2012

THE Earth is no longer going to drown under the weight of melted poles according to the Daily Mail (although, Poles are still obviously a massive threat to the very fabric of some imagined Britishness), which is wonderful news for us all! We can now drive our cars and leave our TVs on standby without fear of making our gill-less children die in a human-imposed watery grave!

And, better yet, they’ve got back-up from the Met Office!

Apparently, the world stopped heating up almost 16 years ago, according to new Met Office data. They say that there’s been no discernible rise in aggregate global temperatures from 1997 to 2012, which PROVES (get that?) that the ‘plateau’ in global warming has now lasted for about the same time as the previous period when temperatures rose, 1980 to 1996.

No explaining those melting mountains in Greenland though. Must be suicide ice or something. Either way, the Mail isn’t letting this go and is irritated because this new data has been released quietly and without fanfare. Must be some kind of woolly, liberal cover-up or something, right?

Of course, Professor Judith Curry – head of climate science department at the prestigious Georgia Tech university, has said that the computer models used to gather these figures were “deeply flawed”, but she would say that, wouldn’t she? She probably the sort to wear hemp trousers and has a dreamcatcher in her car.

And the fact that, since worldwide industrialisation, the world is 0.75 degrees Celsius warmer as a whole that it was. So definitely hotter, but it’s obviously over now. Right?

The Conservative Party’s energy minister – John Hayes – said at the Tory Conference that “the high-flown theories of bourgeois Left-wing academics will not override the interests of ordinary people who need fuel for heat, light and transport – energy policies, you might say, for the many, not the few.”

It goes without saying that people want fuel and heat to run cars and keep houses warm, but really, what’s the problem in finding alternatives that are less polluting and more sustainable?

Posted: 15th, October 2012 | In: Politicians Comments (2) | TrackBack | Permalink