Anorak News | New Yorker sues for slipping on “foreign white substance” at gym

New Yorker sues for slipping on “foreign white substance” at gym

by | 21st, June 2013

MARC Moskowitz says he slipped on a “foreign white substance” on the floor at the Bally Total Fitness gym on E. 55th St., New York City.

Mr Moskowitz blames the gays.  In his lawsuit filed at the Manhattan Supreme Court, Mr Moskowitz, 66, says the place is known for “cruising and lewd behaviour”, that homosexual action is “commonplace at the steam room, sauna and locker rooms. As a result of the aforementioned activities, there was bodily fluids and other evidence of sexual activity wherever it occurred throughout the gym.”

You may wonder why a man joined a club famous for “cruising and lewd behaviour”? Was it for research purposes? Was he unsure what cruising was, entering the gym expecting a large brass band, a captain’s table and yoga on the poop deck?

It would seem not. Moskowitz’s lawsuit defines “cruising” as “the act of searching for homosexual partners in public places”.

Anyhow, Mr Moskowitz says he slipped on the good. His shoulder injuries required surgery. He wants compensation.

His lawyer, David Grover, says of the whole gay, cruising thing:

“Unless you’re involved in that lifestyle you would not know that.”

As such Mr Moskowitz was an innocent abroad.

The best line, however, is reserved for gym manager Kyrell Buckhead:

“I‘d say it’s not that dark down there. It’s a wet and slippery kind of place.” 

‘Nuff said.

Posted: 21st, June 2013 | In: Reviews Comment | TrackBack | Permalink