Anorak News | Life Once Removed: One Woman’s Wonderful Life With Her Fake Family (Photos To Make You Hate Your Life And Envy Hers)

Life Once Removed: One Woman’s Wonderful Life With Her Fake Family (Photos To Make You Hate Your Life And Envy Hers)

by | 6th, February 2014

IN 2010, we shone a light on the Doll Forum – the online meeting place for adult doll owners. We showed you photos from Mechwizard’s holidays with Zara, a tall brunette with long hair and well-appointed orifices. We waited. And now Denver’s Suzanne Heintz shows us that it’s not just men who seek companionship from mannequins. It’s women, too. In Life Once Removed, Suzanne, Mr Heintz and the Heintz nipper take great family trips. They look like they get along so very well. It’s all smiles all the time with the Heintz family.


The Second Honeymoon.

She got her dad’s posture.



Says the artist:

What would drive you to pack a family of mannequins into your station wagon, and take them on a road trip? Enough pressure to conform will send anyone packing. That’s how I came to this personal project about what is essentially…Spinsterhood, and the American Way.

Well meaning strangers, along with friends and family, would raise an eyebrow when the topic of my unmarried and childless status arose. Indicating with a small facial twitch, not only my audacious freakishness, but that I was a little old for such foolish thinking. I mean, come on, eggs don’t last forever!

But really, what was I supposed to do? You can’t just go out and buy a family. Or can you? I did.


Is that tension in the Tuileries?


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She adds:

We love & obey the formatted image of a well-lived life. So deeply ingrained is that strange auto-grin we put on when a camera is present. Do we live our lives with a keen awareness of how it feels, or just how it looks?

If I pass through life without checking off the boxes for a wedding ring and a baby carriage, I will be missing the photo album, but not not the point. When I take my photos, others stop and stare, then they ask, “why are you doing this?” They, at that moment, are starting to get the point too.


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It is brilliant. Family boast cards of magic moments with the talented, genius child – as advertised on those proud parents’ Facebook news feeds – are signs that you are so bored with things, your life is so weak and hollow that you have time to post the banal mundanity of the average in a desperate hope that another person will say, “Wow. Amazing. Such a gorgeous family.” And the truly terrifying thing is that they do. There are people who have the time to comment on the photo fisher. And these commentators don’t say “Your kid is average” or “get a grip”. They say exactly what the bored parents wanted them to. This raises the chance that when they post a photo of their incredible family moment, the poster they praised will write “Stunning!”

This will go until the kids reach puberty.


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Anorak can be cynical. But I’m right to be. I’ve heard parents speaking at the school gates. You want to see one of the gushing, super-friendly mums and dads truly smile – and I mean beam? Watch the smarter kid come out of school and tell mum they failed, or the good looking one fail the audition. Now capture that grin on camera.

No flash required…


Spotter: OtherParents

Posted: 6th, February 2014 | In: Key Posts, The Consumer Comment | TrackBack | Permalink