Anorak News | Meet The Megachurch Pastor Who ‘Conned’ You Into Buying His Fake NYT Bestseller Book

Meet The Megachurch Pastor Who ‘Conned’ You Into Buying His Fake NYT Bestseller Book

by | 12th, March 2014

mark driscoll bullshit


MARK Driscoll is a Christian preacher at Seattle’s Mars Hill Church. He is billed on the megachurch’s website as a “Preaching and Vision Pastor”.

Pastor Mark Driscoll is the founding pastor of Mars Hill Church—based in Seattle, Washington—and one of the most popular preachers in the world today. In 2010, Preaching magazine named him one of the 25 most influential pastors of the past 25 years…

Pastor Mark is the author of over 15 books, and has also written for CNN and The Washington Post, and been featured as a columnist for The Seattle Times.

He values media. And:

Most importantly, Pastor Mark is a husband to Grace and a father to the “fab five” Driscoll kids. He’s grateful to be a nobody trying to tell everybody about Somebody.

The man is prolific. He also represents a Church that doesn’t allow women to be part of the clergy. Homosexuality and abortions are gateways to Hell. He knows what God wants:



mark driscoll


The intro to his book on smut is golden:

You are part of a culture that spends more money each year on pornography than country music, rock music, jazz music, classical music, Broadway plays, and ballet combined. In Paul’s day, he accused some people of worshiping their stomachs as their god, and in our day it appears that our god has simply moved a short distance south.

As the pastor of a large and growing church filled with strong men, many of them young, I have seen the secret sins of pornography and masturbation paralyze many men with shame, guilt, and embarrassment. I have written this booklet to discuss these matters in a manner that is both theological and practical, in hopes of contributing to each of you experiencing the power of the gospel to forgive, renew, and empower you by grace. Because I am speaking to fellow men, my tone may not be well suited for some women and, therefore, I would request that they not read this booklet, unless they are a wife whose husband has read it first and he can discuss its contents with her in love. For men wanting to encourage other men to lives of purity, I pray this booklet would be a useful and readable piece of literature that you could pass on to as many dudes as possible as a pedagogical tool for cranial-rectal extraction.

But, hold on, Mark’s no fool. He understands that a few women stray:

Women do watch porn, and women do masturbate. I have been in ministry long enough to know that sin is not confined to any one gender. But the purpose of my writing is for men. Masturbation is more widely practiced among men. In fact, no survey seems to have discovered any culture in which more women masturbate than men. This may, in part, be explained by the more convenient and visible external nature of male genitalia.

The dick is easy to spot.

David Sessions has more:

A quick review of Driscoll’s greatest hits: Stay-at-home dads are “worse than unbelievers.” James Cameron’s Avatar is “the most demonic, satanic film” he’s ever seen. A wife should keep herself “sexually available” to her husband and, if she believes the Bible, better be giving him frequent blowjobs. “Effeminate” church musicians should be mocked on Facebook. Abstaining from alcohol can be a “sin.” The church has turned Jesus into a “a Richard Simmons, hippie, queer Christ,” when he’s actually a “prize fighter” who is “coming back looking for blood.” The Bible says women can’t have leadership positions in church because they’re “more gullible and easier to deceive than men.” Male masturbation is a “form of homosexuality” if there’s not a woman present.

So. He knows God’s will. He knows your mind and your body. And you can buy his books, which are popular enough to be on the New York Times’ Bestsellers list. His Wikipedia page tells us:

With his wife, he co-authored Real Marriage, which reached #1 on the New York Times Advice How-to Bestseller List in January 2012.


bullshit mark driscoll


But wait a moment. The Blaze notes:

Mars Hill Church in Seattle has officially responded to media reports that it paid at least $210,000 in 2011 and 2012 to hire a marketing firm to help get Pastor Mark Driscoll’s book, “Real Marriage,” on best-seller lists, admitting that church leaders engaged in what it called an “unwise strategy” — and pledging never to do so again.

Yeah. Driscoll so trusts the words of the God he represents on Mars Hill and planet Earth that his Church pretends his work is more popular than it is. The fix appears as an inducement to buy on the book’s dust jacket.


Screen shot 2014-03-12 at 10.08.49


MPHBooks notes:

World Magazine obtained a document that showed a contract between Mars Hill Church and ResultSource Inc. According to their website, ResultSource offers a Bestseller Campaign, which focuses on actual physical book sales, as opposed to their standard Book Launch Campaign, which focuses on author platforms and media attention. World spells out the agreement between ResultSource and Mars Hill:

Result Source received a fee of $25,000 to coordinate a nationwide network of book buyers who would purchase Real Marriage at locations likely to generate reportable sales for various best-seller lists, including the New York Times list. Mars Hill also paid for the purchase of at least 11,000 books ranging in price from $18.62 to $20.70, depending on whether the books were purchased individually or in bulk. The contract called for 6,000 of the books to be bought by individuals, whose names were supplied by the church. Another 5,000 books were bought in bulk.

Mars Hill would not say whether the funds for the purchase of these books, which would total approximately $123,600 for the individual sales and $93,100 for the bulk sales, came from church funds.

The Mars Hill Church says:

At Mars Hill, we’re all about Jesus—and the only way to get to know Jesus is to understand what the Bible says about him, which also includes what he said about himself.

It looks a lot like the church is all about Mark. And, by the way, the Bible can be read for free…

Watching Mark is free, too:


Posted: 12th, March 2014 | In: Key Posts, Reviews Comment | TrackBack | Permalink