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Anorak News | Donald Trump: 3 millions migrants, Farage’s Brex Pistols and a ‘riot’ 58 floors up

Donald Trump: 3 millions migrants, Farage’s Brex Pistols and a ‘riot’ 58 floors up

by | 14th, November 2016

Donald Trump continues to set the tabloid news agenda. (Well, that and the I’m A Celebrity Get Me Out of Here!).

The Mirror leads with Donal Trump’s “TV PLEDGE”. Ha, indeed. Everything we’ve seen of Trump has been a TV pledge. Even the people watching the live show should admit Trump’s words carry the legend “as seen on TV”.

“I Will Kick Out 3 Million Migrants,” runs the Trump telly pledge. The US President-elect will “deport or jail up to three million illegal immigrants”. Well, as soon as he gets a handle on the numbers, he can start building the prisons and fuelling the planes. Trump says it’s “probably two million, it could even be three million”. Why stop at three million? The answer could be because Trump understands media and that sound-bites are all. Save four million for a slow news day.

 

Trump Farage

 

The Express hears the headline figure and muses on its front page: “Trump to kick out 3million migrants…Now Britons asks: can we do the same?” By Page 4 readers have an answer: “UK backing for Trump to deport migrants.”

The Express then produces a phone poll: “Should Britain now send home all illegal migrants?” Ah, not all migrants, as the front-page said. All illegal migrants. Having delivered a poll more loaded than Trump’s can of hair lacquer, heard from three UKIP voices and one Tory, we leave the Express and look at the Sun’s front page. We see Nigel Farage, retired and re-instated UKIP leader ad nauseam. Farage “humiliated” the Government  by saying it was in the “national interest” for him to broker any post-Brexit trade deal with the US, says the Sun.

Which nation is unspecified, but given the calibre of Farage’s dream team – the “Brex Pistols” – we can’t rule out France.

 

Trump Farage

 

On Page 4, the Sun reminds reader that Farage is not the country’s popularly elected leader. It says Theresa May – who isn’t either – is Primer Minister.  May will deliver a speech in which she “promises to clamp down on rampant immigration”. She will do this by:

a) Building a wall.

b) Surrounding the country with water (see Ice Age-induced Brexit)

c) Saying it clearly.

d) See what Trump does.

trump may farage

 

It’s Trump and Farage on the Mail’s cover. It’s a terrific photo of the two men stood before Trump’s gold and diamond-encrusted front door. Over two pages, Andrew Pierce has the “riotous inside story” behind it. Farage and his four cohorts were “mesmerised” by Trump’s flat. One of them called a Renoir on a wall “magnificent”. Another called an Eros statue “striking”.

And, er, that’s it.

No riots.

They were outside.



Posted: 14th, November 2016 | In: Politicians, Reviews, Tabloids Comment (1) | TrackBack | Permalink