Anorak

Paul Sorene | Anorak - Part 18

Paul Sorene - Author Archive

Transfer Balls: Spurs and Arsenal in for Bailly as Manchester United get a new defence

Transfer Balls: José Mourinho will change Manchester United’s defence early next year. From “When we win it’s all down to me; when we lose it was everyone else”, the new … (read more)

Posted: 16th, November 2018 | In: Arsenal, Back pages, Chelsea, Liverpool, manchester united, Sports, Spurs | Comment


BBC sign language expert nails Brexit

Are you keeping up with Brexit? Nothing’s been signed. No deal has been done. The UK remains in the EU. Millions of words have been written on the matter. But … (read more)

Posted: 16th, November 2018 | In: Politicians, TV & Radio | Comment


Fulham balls: Wenger ‘snub’ but Ranieri was the ‘obvious’ choice

Fulham only appointed Claudio Ranieri as their new manager because former Arsenal boss Arsene Wenger “snubbed” them. So says the Daily Mirror: “Arsene Wenger turned down sensational return to management … (read more)

Posted: 15th, November 2018 | In: Back pages, Sports | Comment


Cheating wife guilty of trying to shoot, poison and drown terminally ill husband

 

Hayley Weatherall, 32, wanted to kill her terminally ill husband, Ray Weatherall, to be with his best friend with whom she’d been having an affair. Today a jury at Maidstone Crown … (read more)

Posted: 15th, November 2018 | In: Key Posts, News | Comment


Boys on bicycles fight with town crier fo his tricorn hat

In yer face, all you fear-mongers with your dystopian stories of youths lost to drugs, iPhones and sexting. In Gloucester a town crier hurled his bell at boys getting some … (read more)

Posted: 15th, November 2018 | In: News, Strange But True | Comment


Jamal Khashoggi: Saudi Arabia plans to swiftly execute all the guilty men

Justice moves fast in Saudi Arabia. By the time you’ve read this, chances are the five suspects charged with ordering and carrying out the killing of Saudi journalist Jamal Khashoggi … (read more)

Posted: 15th, November 2018 | In: News | Comment


Queen eats bananas like a princess

A young Prince Edward is potty trained

 

What do you want: Brexit, Brexit, Brexit and Brexit or “Her Majesty’s bizarre way of eating bananas”? ‘Nanas it is. … (read more)

Posted: 15th, November 2018 | In: Key Posts, News, Royal Family, Tabloids | Comment


Freshly divorced texan blows up her wedding dress

 

Kimberly Santleben-Stiteler celebrated her divorce by detonating her wedding dress. Santleben-Stiteler, from near San Antonio, Texas, laced her gown with 20 pounds of Tannerite, stood pretty well back and shot … (read more)

Posted: 14th, November 2018 | In: Key Posts, News, Strange But True | Comment


Transfer Balls: Manchester United want Milan’s Milan and Liverpool dog deep for Dembélé

Transfer Balls: So desperate is Alexis Sanchez to leave Manchester United that he’s going to demand a reduction in his £500,000-a-week wage to make him more affordable to, well, anyone … (read more)

Posted: 14th, November 2018 | In: Arsenal, Back pages, Liverpool, Manchester City, manchester united, Sports, Spurs | Comment


James Bulger: tabloids bring up the body to attack Robert Thompson and stir Blair’s mob

 

The 1993 killing of James Bulger continues to occupy minds in the tabloids. Bulger, 2, was killed by children, ten-year-olds Robert Thompson and Jon Venables. The latter has been in … (read more)

Posted: 14th, November 2018 | In: Key Posts, News | Comment


Police get 6 more months to find Madeleine McCann

“YOU’VE 6 More Months to find Maddie.” You. (Me?!) Yes, you. You might qualify for the huge reward the News of The World posted for information leading to the return … (read more)

Posted: 14th, November 2018 | In: Key Posts, Madeleine McCann, News, Tabloids | Comment


UFOs spotted over Ireland: little green men sought

Ireland’s reputation as a haven for little green men has reached far into the cosmos. UFOS have been spotted over the Emerald Isle. The Irish Aviation Authority (IAA) is investigating … (read more)

Posted: 13th, November 2018 | In: Key Posts, News, Strange But True, Technology | Comment


The diamond ring made entirely of diamond

 

How big is your diamond ring? Well, it depends on the size of your finger? Sothebys is overseeing the sale of a wholly diamond ring created by Apple design guru Jony Ive … (read more)

Posted: 13th, November 2018 | In: Key Posts, News, The Consumer | Comment


Newspaper says Spike Lee not Stan Lee is dead

Stan Lee, fabled comic book storyteller, is not dead. Well, he’s not if you get your news from this paper, which declares: “Spike Lee Dies at 95.” A grinning Stan … (read more)

Posted: 13th, November 2018 | In: Celebrities, Key Posts, News, Strange But True | Comment


Manchester United balls: Mourinho sacked (again), Pochettino waits, Spurs nowhere

Manchester United will sack Jose Mourinho if the club fails to achieve Champions League qualification this season. So says the BBC. And so says the Sun. The paper offers no fact … (read more)

Posted: 13th, November 2018 | In: Back pages, manchester united, Sports, Tabloids | Comment


Asia Bibi: Boris Johnson seizes the opportunity to do the right thing

Is there room in the country for the right sort of asylum seeker? The Daily Mail, a paper whose existence gave rise to thousands of Twitter accounts that use it to define everything … (read more)

Posted: 13th, November 2018 | In: Key Posts, News | Comment


Stan Lee reads Edgar Allan Poe’s The Raven

 

‘The only advice anybody can give is, if you wanna be a writer, keep writing. And read all you can, read everything” – Stan Lee (December 28, 1922 – November … (read more)

Posted: 12th, November 2018 | In: Books, Celebrities, Key Posts | Comment


Transfer balls: Gareth Bale to Arsenal and ex Gooner becomes a Prophet

 

Clickbait Balls: a look at newspapers tricking readers . Today, as ever, it’s the Daily Express, which thunders: “Arsenal news: Gareth Bale transfer EXCLUSIVE, Unai Emery revelation, Wolves team news.”

It’s … (read more)

Posted: 12th, November 2018 | In: Arsenal, Back pages, Key Posts, Sports, Tabloids | Comment


Arsenal Balls: Daily Express feasts on Danny Welbeck’s pain

 

The ghouls have been out fo Arsenal striker Danny Welbck. Last night, Arsenal manger Unai Emery told media that Welbeck had surgery on his badly injured ankle on Friday – … (read more)

Posted: 12th, November 2018 | In: Arsenal, Back pages, Key Posts, Sports, Tabloids | Comment


Manchester City balls: Raheem Sterling takes journalism to the dogs

Manchester City attacker Raheem Sterling has a dog. The Daily Mirror presents this as news. Having priced the player’s home, the Mirror then delivers one of the most asinine lines … (read more)

Posted: 11th, November 2018 | In: Back pages, Manchester City, Sports, Tabloids | Comment


Cardiff City: Sol Bmba has blue skin

 

Did Cardiff City’s Sol Bamba take his shirt off after hitting the deciding goal in his side’s 2-1 win over Brighton? Unless the new Brighton kit is made of human … (read more)

Posted: 11th, November 2018 | In: Sports | Comment


Statue of anti-fascist hero breaks leg of ‘fascist’ trying to destroy it

To Split, Croatia, where a man broke his leg when a statue to an anti-fascist fell on him after he pushed it over. Centrist Croatian politician Krešo Beljak quipped on … (read more)

Posted: 10th, November 2018 | In: Key Posts, Strange But True | Comment


Arsenal balls: Danny Welbeck – more injury facts

When Danny Welbeck hurt his ankle playing for Arsenal, the Press were quick to brand it a “horror injury”. Welbeck was in pain. That much was clear. But it wasn’t … (read more)

Posted: 10th, November 2018 | In: Arsenal, Back pages, News, Sports | Comment


Liverpool teach Manchester City’s Sterling the correct way to cheat

When Raheem Sterling was awarded a penalty for falling over in the box during Manchester City’s 6-0 hammering of Shakhtar it was clear to everyone but the referee the wrong decision … (read more)

Posted: 9th, November 2018 | In: Back pages, Key Posts, Liverpool, Manchester City, Sports | Comment


Waving not drowning at the Boca Juniors match

 

What’s it like to stand with the Boca Juniors fans at La Bombonera? Freelance sports journalist Chris Marshall-Bell (@cmbell310) tells us exactly what it’s like to worship among Los Xeneizes’ … (read more)

Posted: 9th, November 2018 | In: Sports | Comment