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Paul Sorene | Anorak - Part 31

Paul Sorene - Author Archive

Arsenal transfers: Torreira agrees Leno sought and Papastathopoulos signs

How much money do Arsenal have to spend in the transfer window? The BBC says Arsenal “are close to spending their £50million summer transfer budget”. The Gunners are in for … (read more)

Posted: 14th, June 2018 | In: Arsenal, Back pages, Sports | Comment


Oxford child sex gang jailed; don’t mention race and religion

How do you report on the eight men jailed for abusing children as young as 13? The Daily Express says: “A child sex gang has been jailed for nearly 90 … (read more)

Posted: 13th, June 2018 | In: News | Comment


Arsenal play Chelsea in Dublin in readiness for European super league

Arsenal will play Chelsea on 4 August in a pre-season rubber in Dublin as part of the – get this – International Champions Cup (ICC). Neither club is the Premier … (read more)

Posted: 13th, June 2018 | In: Arsenal, Chelsea, Liverpool, Manchester City, manchester united, Sports, Spurs | Comment


Wetherspoon stops selling champagne; Primark closes Chanel concessions

Brexit continues to ripple although British society. The BBC brings news to chill the marrow: “Wetherspoon to stop selling champagne ahead of Brexit.” Who knew you could buy champagne at … (read more)

Posted: 13th, June 2018 | In: News, The Consumer | Comment


Journalist mocks French-only rule at Antoine Griezmann press conference

Atletico Madrid’s France striker and anti-dandruff activist Antoine Griezmann was the star of a press conference in which the rule was that all question should be in French. This was … (read more)

Posted: 13th, June 2018 | In: Sports | Comment


Narcissism saves 30m North Koreans from nuclear destruction

Baseball caps off to Donald Trump. It turns out that he and North Korean leader Kim Jong-un want to make America great again. The paid had “a really fantastic meeting. … (read more)

Posted: 13th, June 2018 | In: Key Posts, News, Politicians | Comment


Transfer balls: Arsenal agree deal with Sampdoria’s Lucas Torreira

Arsenal have agreed to splurge £26.4m on Sampdoria’s Lucas Torreira. The Gunners are working to secure the hard-working 22-year-old Uruguayan on a five-year deal.

Torreira is in Russia for the World … (read more)

Posted: 13th, June 2018 | In: Arsenal, Sports | Comment


Transfer balls: MEN dupes Manchester United fans with fake news

“Justin Kluivert completes Roma move,” declares the Manchester Evening News in its “live” blog of “Manchester United transfer news”. Ciaran Kelly is scathing of the fools who thought Kluivert was … (read more)

Posted: 12th, June 2018 | In: Back pages, manchester united, Sports | Comment


Grenfell: how the fire spread

What did so many people die when a flat in Grenfell Tower caught fire? We now the flames spread in the concrete clock – concrete does not burn but new … (read more)

Posted: 11th, June 2018 | In: News | Comment


Tea towels you keep forever linked to food poisoning

Your tea towel is killing you. Maybe. The Daily Mail says “repeatedly using an old one could help to spread food poisoning”.

 

 

It’s said much the same thing many times.
“A 2015 … (read more)

Posted: 11th, June 2018 | In: News, Tabloids | Comment


Transfer Balls: Torreira is Arsenal’s new one-man midfield

In what TeamTalk calls a “boost” for Unai Emery, a “€25m Serie A star” Lucas Torreira has  “agrees” to transfer to Arsenal.

 

Done deal!

 

Teamtalk says Lucas Torreira’s … (read more)

Posted: 11th, June 2018 | In: Arsenal, Back pages, Sports | Comment


Breaking: Posh and Becks STILL married

More ‘no news’ news on the Sun’s cover: David Beckham and Victoria are still married. Yesterday they held hands at a London fashion event. It was a “show of unity”. … (read more)

Posted: 11th, June 2018 | In: Celebrities, Tabloids | Comment


The Free Tommy Robinson March and World Naked Bike Riders collide in London

London – June 9 2018:

The Free Tommy Robinson March has accidentally bumped into the World Naked Bike Ride event in London. What a time to be alive. pic.twitter.com/gTF0YIapdJ
— Chairman Lmao … (read more)

Posted: 10th, June 2018 | In: News | Comment


Transfer balls: Fekir rejects Liverpool

No News – Breaking! France forward Nabil Fekir is not joining Liverpool. Fekir will remain at Lyon. Fekir was supposed to join Liverpool for 60m euros. He even wore the Liverpool … (read more)

Posted: 9th, June 2018 | In: Liverpool, Sports | Comment


Transfer balls: Fakir kisses the Liverpool badge but still plays for Lyons

Liverpool have not signed Nabil Fakir for £53million. News is that the Reds stalled after the Lyon took his medical with the club. Fekir performed media duties in a Liverpool … (read more)

Posted: 9th, June 2018 | In: Back pages, Liverpool, Sports | Comment


Transfer balls: Higuain and Lewandowski to Chelsea; Arsenal still waiting

Whenever Argentina striker Gonzalo Higuain pop up in transfer chatter, we laugh a little. It’s been five years since the Sun told its readers that Arsenal had “smashed their transfer … (read more)

Posted: 8th, June 2018 | In: Arsenal, Back pages, Sports | Comment


Transfer balls: Nabil Fakir wants Liverpool; dreams of Barcelona

Joyous transfer balls balls on the BBC.  The national broadcaster picks up the tale of Nabil Fakir’s move from Lyon to Liverpool. Get a load of this: “Lyon will allow forward … (read more)

Posted: 7th, June 2018 | In: Back pages, Liverpool, Sports, Tabloids | Comment


Heinz Salad Cream or Sandwich Cream: the taste of bottled jizz

Heinz Salad Cream is relaunching. The sweetened gunk is to change it name to ‘Sandwich Cream’ because, as the marketing bilge states, “millennials don’t use it on salad.” But they … (read more)

Posted: 7th, June 2018 | In: Celebrities, The Consumer | Comment


Transfer balls: Yacine Adli joins Arsenal at 18; Higuain still missing

Have Arsenal signed Yacine Adli for just £223,000? The Metro and Sun says they have.

 

 

The media seem confused. The Sun says:
RMC Sport claim he has penned a three-year deal, with the option … (read more)

Posted: 6th, June 2018 | In: Arsenal, Back pages, Sports, Tabloids | Comment


Prince Andrew and Sarah Ferguson reunited in Mirror and Mail cut and paste disaster

The Mirror is promoting an auction of photographs by “royal snapper” John Scott, who died in 1986. The paper omits to mention where the auction is talking place – you … (read more)

Posted: 6th, June 2018 | In: Key Posts, News, Royal Family, Tabloids | Comment


Liverpool balls: Karius ‘dumped’ and remade in Chelsea

Yet another “exclusive” in the Daily Star, which brings news of Liverpool goalkeeper Loris Karius. He’s been “dumped after girlfriend gets death threats over Champions League howlers”. Before we get … (read more)

Posted: 6th, June 2018 | In: Back pages, Liverpool, Sports, Tabloids | Comment


Clickbait transfer news: Manchester United ‘told to SACK’ Mourinho

“Man Utd transfer news: Bigwigs told to abandon plans and sack Jose Mourinho – EXCLUSIVE.” So thunders the Daily Star.  “MANCHESTER UNITED need to focus on changing their manager – … (read more)

Posted: 6th, June 2018 | In: Back pages, manchester united, Sports | Comment


Arsenal: Papastathopoulos and Fellaini reject Manchester United; Lichtsteiner joins; Gunners go tall

Who will be Unai Emery’s first signing at Arsenal? If media chatter is any guide, it’ll be someone tall. The large Sokratis Papastathopoulos looks to be on his way. The centre-back should complete a … (read more)

Posted: 5th, June 2018 | In: Arsenal, manchester united, Sports | Comment


Spurs kill Pochettino’s dream to manage Real Madrid

Spurs manager Mauricio Pochettino has been talking about Real Madrid. He told us he’d have to listen if the Spanish club offered him the manager’s job. He gave Real a … (read more)

Posted: 5th, June 2018 | In: Back pages, Sports, Spurs | Comment


The Last Line – an outstanding bit of British TV from 1981

In 1981 ATV went to the Wolverhampton Fiesta. Jacqueline was there. She was about to do something dangerous. John Swallow reports:

 

 

Spotter: @aflashbak and @CFBClips – two Twitter accounts well worth … (read more)

Posted: 4th, June 2018 | In: TV & Radio | Comment