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Anorak - Author Archive

Gun heroes vow to shoot Hurricane Irma clean out of the sky

Ply board and corrugated iron won’t stop Hurricane Irma. But guns might. The terrifying and immense Hurricane Irma is heading to Florida. Over six millions Americans have been told to … (read more)

Posted: 10th, September 2017 | In: Key Posts, News, Strange But True | Comment


‘Lottters will be shot’: Hurricane fighters vow to shoot Irma

 

Spotter: Too Soon … (read more)

Posted: 10th, September 2017 | In: Strange But True | Comment


Uganda vows to attack gays with a ‘homos’-sniffing machine

The Ugandan government is on the look out for homosexuals. Helping it to detect “homos and porn actors, especially those misusing applications like Whatsapp with sex acts” is a gadget … (read more)

Posted: 9th, September 2017 | In: Key Posts, News, Politicians, Technology | Comment


Bias balls: Liverpool robbed by Sadio Mane red card as ref favours Manchester City

Media Bias: Manchester City annihilated Liverpool 5-0 in the Premiere League. A goal down, Liverpool’s cause was not helped when in the 37th minute their striker Sadio Mane was red … (read more)

Posted: 9th, September 2017 | In: Liverpool, Manchester City, Sports | Comment


Car crash opening to BBC World News (Video)

BBC World News has broadcasts a novel new intro.

 

😂 wonderful car crash opening to BBC World News just now. Pick a camera, any camera 😛 pic.twitter.com/5XxrdwQXcr— Andrew Roberts 💬 (@AndyMRoberts) … (read more)

Posted: 9th, September 2017 | In: TV & Radio | Comment


RIP Greg Escalante maven of kustom kulture artifacts

Greg Escalante, co-creator of Juxtapoz magazine, has died. He was only 62. The OC Weekly profiles the pop culture maven:
A native of Los Alamitos and bond trader by profession, Escalante started scouring the art galleries and … (read more)

Posted: 9th, September 2017 | In: Reviews | Comment


Clickbait balls: Arsenal ‘sign’ Lemar but only in the Sun

Illustrating just how bad Arsenal are at transfers, news reaches us that Monaco and France star Thomas Lemar “agrees £250,000-a-week five-year Gunners deal”. The Sun delivers this news in a … (read more)

Posted: 9th, September 2017 | In: Arsenal, Back pages, Sports | Comment


Harriet Harman wants ‘deadbeat dad’ Jacob-Rees-Mogg to wake up and small the shit

 

If you go to work, make money and provide well for the large family you love, you are, in the words of Harriet Harman, a “deadbeat dad”. To be a … (read more)

Posted: 9th, September 2017 | In: Key Posts, News, Politicians | Comment


Arsenal balls: Sanchez ‘will’ sign a new contract if you twist Wenger’s words

Was the Sun’s Neil Ashton in the room when Arsenal manager Arsene Wenger spoke to media on Thursday? Ashton has big news on the press conference:
Arsene Wenger has launched a … (read more)

Posted: 8th, September 2017 | In: Arsenal, Back pages, Sports, Tabloids | Comment


Charity trekker discovers Mount Kilimanjaro is no longer in Wales

Mount Kilimanjaro is not in Wales. Never has been. But Nikki Barnett didn’t know that when she signed up for a charity hike to the summit. “I just thought it … (read more)

Posted: 8th, September 2017 | In: News, Strange But True | Comment


Madeleine McCann: police seek more money

Madeleine McCann: a look at reporting on the missing child in the news.

Daily Express (Page 11): “Madeleine police seek funds”

To which the reply must be: don’t they always?

The story goes … (read more)

Posted: 8th, September 2017 | In: Madeleine McCann, Tabloids | Comment


Prince George’s first day at school: beaming with nerves and mind control

Prince George has started school. His big moment is all over the papers. He’s “His royal Shyness” on the Mirror and Mail’s front pages, and “Heir to learn” on the … (read more)

Posted: 8th, September 2017 | In: Royal Family, Tabloids | Comment


Hetty Douglas should join the Labour Party and really belittle the working class

By way of a follow up to the story of Hetty Douglas, the artist who sneakily took the piss out of scaffolders as they all waited in line for a … (read more)

Posted: 8th, September 2017 | In: Key Posts, News | Comment


Arsenal balls: Wenger on the legends, Liverpool and Thursday nights

Arsène Wenger’s Arsenal press conference revealed that he can talk about what might have been just as well on a Thursday as he can do on a Friday. Moving his … (read more)

Posted: 8th, September 2017 | In: Arsenal, News, Sports | Comment


Liverpool can still win the league by letting in loadsa goals

Some Liverpool balls from ‘Big’ Sam Allardyce. The former England manager has been talking to talkSPORT. He knows why Liverpool will not win the Premier League title:
“The game is played … (read more)

Posted: 7th, September 2017 | In: Liverpool, Sports | Comment


Everton star Wayne Rooney’s holiday romance – and Gary Neville’s advice to Coleen

 

For those of you wondering how Wayne Rooney and the lovely Coleen are getting along, the Daily Star has front-page news: “ROONEY GIRL TRACKED COLEEN.” The Rooney girl is his … (read more)

Posted: 7th, September 2017 | In: Back pages, News, Sports, Tabloids | Comment


Alexis Sanchez calls Arsenal his ‘home’ and vows to focus

A busy week at the tabloids, as writers think hard about how to fill in the blank pages over the international break. The Sun overlooks doodles of knobs and photos of … (read more)

Posted: 7th, September 2017 | In: Arsenal, Back pages, Sports | Comment


How to fire a freelancer

 

The Globe and Mail has canned “a number of” freelance columnists, including Tabatha Southey and Leah McLaren. The paper’s editor-in-chief, David Walmsley, thought it decent to sack them by form … (read more)

Posted: 7th, September 2017 | In: Money | Comment


Kak-handed Spanish police alienate Saudi King

Look out Bournemouth, here come the Saudis! Saudi Arabia’s King Salman bin Abdulaziz is most displeased with the treatment meted out to his eldest son, Prince Abudullah, as he dined … (read more)

Posted: 6th, September 2017 | In: Key Posts, News, Royal Family | Comment


Ted Heath, Jim Hemming and the evidence gap

 

Police have stopped investigating former LibDem MP John Hemming for his alleged part in a paedophile ring. The former MP for Birmingham Yardley – he left the Commons in 2015 – … (read more)

Posted: 6th, September 2017 | In: News, Politicians | Comment


Douglas Bader meets the Fokkers: an hilarious anecdote from Britain’s war hero

Group Captain Sir Douglas Robert Steuart Bader BE, DSO & Bar, DFC & Bar, FRAeS, DL (21 February 1910 – 5 September 1982) pic.twitter.com/9ZTqRRhS5G
— Flashbak.com (@aflashbak) September 6, 2017

Trasnscription:
He was … (read more)

Posted: 6th, September 2017 | In: Celebrities | Comment


Hetty Douglas is your internet hate figure of the day

Vying with Robbie Travers for the title of Hate Figure of the Minute is Hetty Douglas, a 25-year-old artist, it says here, living in south London. On anthropological manoeuvres in … (read more)

Posted: 6th, September 2017 | In: News, Tabloids | Comment


Spurs Balls: Dele Alli’s finger is rushed down to forensics (and it stinks of Nazis)

When Spurs footballer Dele Alli raised a middle finger on international duty, the media went into overdrive. So bad was it that Sky Sports produced this hilarious illustration:

 

 

‘Player Swears On … (read more)

Posted: 6th, September 2017 | In: Back pages, Sports, Spurs | Comment


High winds: Weatherman farts on live TV

 

What’s the forecast, Mr Weatherman. Wind. High wind.

And thanks to the people who made this video – the people who record the weather and play it back.

 

  … (read more)

Posted: 6th, September 2017 | In: Strange But True, TV & Radio | Comment


Samsung Fridge broadcasts streaming sex videos

Porn is ubiquitous. You can even get it on your fridge. A Samsung Family Hub at Home Depot was set to browse PornHub videos.

Samsung’s expensive fridge can do all sort … (read more)

Posted: 6th, September 2017 | In: Strange But True, The Consumer | Comment