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I’m Not A Racist But…

‘“I AM not a racist but…” And so the man on the Barking omnibus explains why he is considering voting for the British National Party. Griffin is an eye-opener … (read more)

Posted: 26th, April 2006 | In: Uncategorized | Comment

The Untouchable

‘NOT everything Kevin Costner does flops. The wooden actor who always manages to be Kevin Costner in every performance, has been accused of performing a lewd sex act in front … (read more)

Posted: 26th, April 2006 | In: Tabloids | Comment

Name Your Price

‘“I LOVE the name Lucas,” says Coleen McLoughlin, “which comes from the Latin word for light.” The face that launched a thousand shell suits … (read more)

Posted: 26th, April 2006 | In: Tabloids | Comment

Talking Crap

‘MAKING the huge leap from the career of Kevin Federline to the contents of a nappy, we read that Tom Cruise loves changing his newborn daughter. Tom has a Michael … (read more)

Posted: 25th, April 2006 | In: Tabloids | Comment

A Shoe In

‘“SARAH! Sar-rah…” The sing-song school ma’am voice calls across the road to Sarah Teather, the LibDem’s diminutive MP for Brent East. Teather – coming through a letter box near you … (read more)

Posted: 25th, April 2006 | In: Uncategorized | Comments (3)

Celebrity Death Race

‘WAS it a cry for help? David Bedford, director of the London Marathon, says that Jade Goody’s attempt to win the race was “almost at times suicidal”. ‘Isn’t a Marathon … (read more)

Posted: 25th, April 2006 | In: Tabloids | Comment

Upstage Girl

‘“I’M not your brother, I’m not your uncle, I’m Daddy do/ Steppin’ in this game and y’all ain’t got a clue…” Booyakasha! Fed up … (read more)

Posted: 25th, April 2006 | In: Tabloids | Comment

You Could Not Make It Up

‘SUMMON the hairdresser. An ICM poll commissioned by the Guardian says Labour’s support is at 19-year low. The red corner can now count on just 32% of the vote, two … (read more)

Posted: 25th, April 2006 | In: Uncategorized | Comment

Take Her Away

‘“I’M dying, I’m dying,” says the runner in the London Marathon, her yellowy brow caked in sweat. For the next 50 minutes paramedics try to regulate the athlete’s breathing. She … (read more)

Posted: 24th, April 2006 | In: Tabloids | Comment

Pointy Heads

‘SO much for the Silence of the Lambs. The biggest horror story playing in Hollywood last week was The Silence of Katie Holmes. The actress was to give birth in … (read more)

Posted: 24th, April 2006 | In: Broadsheets | Comment

Tribal Gathering

‘ANGELINA Jolie is to give birth in a secluded beach resort in Namibia. First among equals … (read more)

Posted: 24th, April 2006 | In: Reviews | Comment

TB Or Not TB

‘EVERY day of every week the Mail thinks up imaginative ways to remind you that life is cruel and you are going to experience pain and die. Here is a … (read more)

Posted: 24th, April 2006 | In: Tabloids | Comment

Got It Taped

‘THERE is a chance that Osama bin Laden sounds nothing like the voice we hear on tape and video. Catch Osama’s latest rantings on Betamax … (read more)

Posted: 24th, April 2006 | In: Uncategorized | Comment

Don’t Hit Me Baby

‘SINCE leaving the Kabbalah and joining the Scientologists, we have learnt that what occurs in the formative moments of a child’s life can shape its future, and no amount of … (read more)

Posted: 24th, April 2006 | In: Reviews | Comment

She Who Must Be Obeyed

‘TO celebrate the Queen’s 80th birthday, the Mail is giving its readers the chance to own a Royal Worcester figurine of Her Majesty. It’s 23cm tall. Is that a fox … (read more)

Posted: 24th, April 2006 | In: Tabloids | Comment

Joking Apart

‘“WE haf ways of making you laugh,” says the Sun’s headline, a twist on the old German staple. “GERMANS TO SHOW FUNNY SIDE.” If Germans did humour… … (read more)

Posted: 24th, April 2006 | In: Back pages | Comment

Could It Be Tragic

‘COULD it be tragic? As Take That reform on a stage in Newcastle, we wonder if the boys can still hack it as singing, dancing heartthrobs. ‘Doctor!’ … (read more)

Posted: 24th, April 2006 | In: Tabloids | Comment

A Real Joey

‘THERE are actors’ actors. There are character actors. And there is Matt LeBlanc, the actor who played a talentless actor struggling to get any work with a rare and empathetic … (read more)

Posted: 24th, April 2006 | In: Reviews | Comment

As Green As They Look

‘“VOTE blue, go green.” So says the banner flying over the Tories’ local election campaign – a banner, and message, that may or may not be made of biodegradable matter. … (read more)

Posted: 24th, April 2006 | In: Uncategorized | Comment

Fruits Of Her Labour

‘MELONS Windsor, nee Helen, has always managed to turn an eye with her “cool elegance”, “delicate blonde beauty” and blueblood roots. Seed money … (read more)

Posted: 21st, April 2006 | In: Reviews | Comment

See Manchester Or Die

‘“I ENJOYED my exit storyline…and to go out on a death was great,” says Hannah Waterman of the demise of her EastEnders character Laura Beale. “What you don’t want is … (read more)

Posted: 21st, April 2006 | In: Reviews | Comment

Voting Booth

‘WHY did you vote Labour at the last General Election. About 37 per cent of the 61 per cent of you who bothered to vote at all opted for Labour. … (read more)

Posted: 21st, April 2006 | In: Uncategorized | Comment

Rocket Man

‘“GEORGE was in a bad place.” No doubt about that. Slumped in the front seat of a jeep by the side of the road is no place for an international … (read more)

Posted: 21st, April 2006 | In: Tabloids | Comment

Taking Libertines

‘BACK for another performance at Thames Magistrates’ Court, Pete Doherty assumes his usual place in the dock and prepares to give the crowd what they want. Pete Doherty – coming … (read more)

Posted: 21st, April 2006 | In: Tabloids | Comment

Air Waves

‘“ELIZABETH THE GREAT,” says the Mail’s front page, saluting the woman who is pictured reading one of the 20,000 cards she has received. “Long may she rule,” says the paper. … (read more)

Posted: 21st, April 2006 | In: Tabloids | Comment

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