Anorak

Film | Anorak - Part 16

Film Category

Includes cinema reviews and trailers for upcoming films. A digest of the best and worst interviews on movies and cinema.

John Carter is not as good as Avatar – it’s so terrible you might die watching it

IS John Carter the film any good? Peter Bradshaw reviews in the the Guardian:

John Carter is one of those films that is so stultifying, so oppressive and so mysteriously and interminably long that I felt as if someone had dragged me into the kitchen of my local Greggs, and was baking my head into the centre of a colossal cube of white bread. As the film went on, the loaf around my skull grew to the size of a basketball, and then a coffee table, and then an Audi. The boring and badly acted sci-fi mashup continued inexorably, and the bready blandness pressed into my nostrils, eardrums, eye sockets and mouth. I wanted to cry for help, but in bread no one can hear you scream. Finally, I clawed the doughy, gooey, tasteless mass desperately away from my mouth and screeched: “Jesus, I’m watching a pointless film about a 1860s American civil war action hero on Mars, which the inhabitants apparently call Barsoom. I can’t breathe.”

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Posted: 12th, March 2012 | In: Film | Comments (2)


Zero Dark Thirty: Osama bin Laden film attracts predictable protests from extras

ZERO Dark Thirty is Kathryn Bigelow’s film about Osama bin Laden. It’s being filmed in Chandigarh, India. The right-winged Hindu nationalist group Vishwa Hindu Parishad, or World Hindu Council, have protested against the hoisting of Pakistani flags during the shooting of the film.

Bigelow was denied permission to film in Pakistan. So Chandigarh became Lahore.

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Posted: 2nd, March 2012 | In: Film | Comment


Harry Potter: Hogwarts castle at the Warner Bros Studio Tour – in photos

EVER wonder why the stars of The Harry Potter films are so small, all sons and daughters of stars from Michael Bentine’s Potty Time? It’s because they have to fit into Hogwarts. which is not larger than a small camper van. Jose Granell, model supervisor, has unviled a model of Hogwarts castle at the Warner Bros Studio Tour, Watford, London. The Hogwarts castle model was built for the first film ‘Harry Potter and the Philosopher’s Stone’, it was created for aerial photography and was digitally scanned for CGI scenes. It took 86 artists and crew members to construct, it measures over 50 feet in diameter and has over 2,500 fibre optic lights.

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Posted: 1st, March 2012 | In: Film | Comment


In the movies – The top 10 rules

IN the movies there are rules. Here are the Top Ten:

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Posted: 28th, February 2012 | In: Film, Key Posts | Comment


Oscars 2012: the best moments in photos

THE 84th Oscars wer a terrific show. Silence as an golden as the statuette as The Artist was named best film at the Oscars. Jean Dujardin became the first Frenchman to win an Academy Award for acting. Michel Hazanavicius, thanks three people for his best picture award for the same film: “Billy Wilder, Billy Wilder and Billy Wilder.” Nicholas Sarkozy, the French president, did as all politics must and thrust himself into the limelight saying the The Artist has made “French cinema proud”.  Meryl Streep scored her second Osar form 17 nominations for playing Lady Thatcher in The Iron Lady. Sacha Baron Cohen hogged the limelight, turning the AGM for the Hollywood film industry into a promotion for his new film by spilling Kim Jong-il’s ashes over the red carpet – but not Halle’s Berry’s chest (again). Another landmark was scored by Christopher Plummer, who at 82 became the oldest actor to win an Oscar, for his performance in The Beginners. Octavia Spencer for getting a gong for her role as the pastry chef in The Help, offering: “I’m freaking out … I’m sorry, I love you … I’m sorry, I love you.” Which might explain why the best actors work with the best scripts…

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Actress Angelina Jolie arrives before the 84th Academy Awards on Sunday, Feb. 26, 2012, in the Hollywood section of Los Angeles. (AP Photo/Amy Sancetta)

 

Posted: 27th, February 2012 | In: Film, Key Posts | Comment


Sacha Baron Cohen’s Oscar stunt gives Ryan Seacrest a powder – video

SACHA Baron Cohen was first banned from promoting his new film, The Dictator, on the Oscars red carpet then allowed to. Arch self-publicist Baron Cohen celebrated on Twitter:

VICTORY IS OURS! Today the Mighty Nation of Wadiya triumphed over the Zionist snakes of Hollywood. Evil and all those who made Satan their protector were vanquished and driven into the Pacific Sea. What I am trying to say here is that the Academy have surrendered and sent over two tickets and a parking pass! TODAY OSCAR, TOMORROW OBAMA!

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Posted: 27th, February 2012 | In: Film, Key Posts | Comment (1)


Oscars – 84th Academy Awards dresses, surgery and red carpet photos

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Meryl Streep arrives before the 84th Academy Awards on Sunday, Feb. 26, 2012, in the Hollywood section of Los Angeles. (AP Photo/Matt Sayles)

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Posted: 26th, February 2012 | In: Film, Key Posts | Comment


Oscars 2012: 84th Academy Awards – British nominees reception (photos)

THE Oscars – the 84th Academy Awards. Before the show the British nominees reception was held at the British Consul General’s Residence in Los Angeles, California. Victoria Beckham and the Rt Hon Jeremy Hunt, Secretary of State for Culture, were there. Which of them is the bigger actor, only you can decide…

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AP OUT: Victoria Beckham arrives at a reception to honour the British Nominees of the 84th Annual Academy Awards, held at the British Consul General's Residence in Los Angeles, California.

Posted: 25th, February 2012 | In: Film | Comment


Sacha Baron Cohen banned from Oscars – Dictators gotta dictate

CONGRATULATIONS to Sacha Baron Cohen for getting barred from the Oscars. The Academy Of Motion Picture Arts & Sciences has revoked Sacha Baron Cohen‘s invite. What has the Academy member and Hugo star done to offend?

Well, he wanted to rock up dressed as the eponymous star of his new firm The Dictator. The Academy don’t like the promotion. It’s an AGM not an entertainment show. So he’s banned.

An Oscars spokesperson tells Deadline Hollywood:

”We would hope that every studio knows that this is a bad idea. The Red Carpet is not about stunting.” Oh really? Then why did Trey Parker and Matt Stone of South Park crossdress down the Red Carpet as J-Lo and Gwyneth Paltrow in evening gowns in 2000? Or Ben Stiller appear as an Oscar presenter in full blue Avatar makeup and hair in 2010?

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Posted: 23rd, February 2012 | In: Film | Comment (1)


Iron Sky: A feeble sense of humour means Nazis will love it

THE Berlinale film festival has given a platform to Iron Sky, the Finnish film in which moon-living Nazis invade Earth

It’s 2018 and the Nazis are zooming back to Earth for one final dash at conquest. As Werner Von Braun said: “Vot gos up musst kom down.”

Director Timo Vuorensola told The Wall Street Journal:

“It’s a funny thing, you make a movie about Moon Nazis and the people who get offended are the Americans. I was expecting the Germans to take it badly… I find that when you make fun of Americans, but you aren’t an American, it’s not always accepted.”

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Posted: 17th, February 2012 | In: Film | Comment (1)


Winners and photos – Bafta Film Awards 2012

HERE are the winners and nominees for the Bafta Film Awards 2012. It was cold on the red carpet. The women wore off-the-shoulder gowns and big grins– acting talent commanding teeth not to chatter and skin not to prick and blister against the flashing bulbs. Clooney, Pitt and all the men wore vests, suits and heavy overcoats, preferring to look cool rather than be very cool indeed…

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Holliday Grainger and Joseph Mawie in the press room at the 2012 Orange British Academy Film Awards at the Royal Opera House, Bow Street, London.

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Posted: 12th, February 2012 | In: Film, Key Posts | Comment (1)


Behind the scenes at the 64th Baftas – photos

BEHIND the scenes at the 2012 Baftas. The 64th Bafta awards will feature such starry stars as George Clooney, Brad Pitt, Tilda Swinton, Gary Oldman and Michael Fassbender. Penelope Cruz. They will tread the red carpet outside Covent’s Garden’s Royal Opera House. We went behind the scenes. Here are the photos of the stars, the dresses, the metal faces on sticks and the food…

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EMBARGOED TO 0001 MONDAY FEBRUARY 6. Fettler Piotr Lichon of New Pro Foundries in West Drayton, West London puts the finishing touches to the Iconic BAFTA Film Award masks ahead of the ceremony later this month.

Posted: 11th, February 2012 | In: Film | Comment


The 18th Screen Actors Guild Awards – in photos

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Angelina Jolie, left, and Brad Pitt arrive at the 18th Annual Screen Actors Guild Awards on Sunday Jan. 29, 2012 in Los Angeles. (AP Photo/Vince Bucci)

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Posted: 30th, January 2012 | In: Film | Comment


India bans The Girl With The Dragon Tattoo – Daniel Craig’s Enya dies horribly

THE anal rape scene in the Hollywood remake of The Girl With the Dragon Tattoo means the film will not be screened in India. You’d suppose all those frescos and carvings of sex and buggery would make the Indians au fait with sodomy. It wasn’t just the rape India’s Central Board of Film Certification wanted  chopped and changed , it was all the sex scenes, of which there at least three. Director David Fincher was noncompliant and refused to make the changes.

Sony Pictures India says:

The Censor Board has adjudged the film unsuitable for public viewing in its unaltered form and, while we are committed to maintaining and protecting the vision of the director, we will, as always, respect the guidelines set by the Board.

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Posted: 29th, January 2012 | In: Film | Comment


The sequel to the 1986 film Ferris Bueller’s Day Off is here – video shivers

THE sequel to the 1986 film Ferris Bueller’s Day Off is looming. On YouTube, ChuckaChucka2012 has uploaded this video.

You’ll like it. You may not like the sequel – how can it live up any billing? But the taste beings back warm memories and a small shiver of life past. Here’s Matthew Broderick in a new white bathrobe.

Anorak will spend the rest of the day is a nostalgic fugue.

Posted: 27th, January 2012 | In: Film | Comment


What is Oscars movie posters told the truth?

WHAT if posters advertising films up for an Oscar told the truth? Let’s see:

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Posted: 27th, January 2012 | In: Film | Comment (1)


Highland boatmen take James Bond’s Skyfall on a coarse boating trip

IN the run up to Christmas, the tiny West Scotland village of Crinan was swamped by film crews capturing the blistering finale for Skyfall the new Bond Film.

Duntrune Castle (the oldest intact and inhabited castle in Scotland) on the north side of Loch Crinan was to be a central point and there were to be boat chases, explosions and the usual over-the-top Bond ructions galore.

The Loch has little in the way of soft sandy beaches and rocks are everywhere.

Regrettably, there were no Italian Cruise Liner Captains around so the film crews hired local boatmen to steer the craft being being filmed in chase sequences. Unlike the Costa Concordia crew, the sturdy Highlanders were instructed to go like hell and stay hidden from the cameras but, for ‘God’s sake’ above all else, keep the highly paid, allegedly macho and/or beautiful, people starring in the film alive and well.

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Posted: 26th, January 2012 | In: Film | Comment


Oscars 2012: Full lit of nominees

THE 84th Academy Awards will feature the following films running for the gongs. The two big stars are Hugo, with 11 nominations, and The Artist, with ten.

TTHE NOMINEES

Actor in a Leading Role
Demián Bichir in A Better Life
George Clooney in The Descendants
Jean Dujardin in The Artist
Gary Oldman in Tinker, Tailor, Soldier, Spy
Brad Pitt in Moneyball

Actor in a Supporting Role
Kenneth Branagh in My Week with Marilyn
Jonah Hill in Moneyball
Nick Nolte in Warrior
Christopher Plummer in Beginners
Max von Sydow in Extremely Loud & Incredibly Close

Actress in a Leading Role
Glenn Close in Albert Nobbs
Viola Davis in The Help
Rooney Mara in The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo
Meryl Streep in The Iron Lady
Michelle Williams in My Week with Marilyn

Actress in a Supporting Role
Bérénice Bejo in The Artist
Jessica Chastain in The Help
Melissa McCarthy in Bridesmaids
Janet McTeer in Albert Nobbs
Octavia Spencer in The Help

Animated Feature Film
A Cat in Paris – Alain Gagnol and Jean-Loup Felicioli
Chico & Rita- Fernando Trueba and Javier Mariscal
Kung Fu Panda 2 – Jennifer Yuh Nelson
Puss in Boots Chris Miller
Rango – Gore Verbinski

Art Direction
The Artist Production Design: Laurence Bennett; Set Decoration:
Robert Gould
Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows Part 2 Production Design:
Stuart Craig; Set Decoration: Stephenie McMillan
Hugo Production Design: Dante Ferretti; Set Decoration: Francesca
Lo Schiavo
Midnight in Paris Production Design: Anne Seibel; Set Decoration:
Hélène Dubreuil
War Horse Production Design: Rick Carter; Set Decoration: Lee Sandales

Cinematography
The Artist – Guillaume Schiffman
The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo – Jeff Cronenweth
Hugo – Robert Richardson
The Tree of Life Emmanuel Lubezki
War Horse Janusz Kaminski

Costume Design
Anonymous – Lisy Christl
The Artist – Mark Bridges
Hugo – Sandy Powell
Jane Eyre – Michael O’Connor
W.E. Arianne Phillips

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Posted: 24th, January 2012 | In: Film | Comments (3)


Banksy’s Coming For Dinner has to be a spoof?

BANKSY’S Coming for Dinner is a film starring Joan Collins, Stephen K Amos and Tamara Beckwith. The idea is that Bansky, the artist, is coming for dinner at Joan’s country estate. The film purports to be the work of an Ivan Massow. If it is, he is sitting on a work of parody that might be a hit. Unless, it’s not. In which case, grab the rotten tomatoes and pray that the man coming to dinner is not the real Banksy but an armed criminal on the run from Broadmoor…

Posted: 23rd, January 2012 | In: Film | Comment


In photos – London Critics’ Circle Film Awards winners, dresses and losers

IT’S the 2012 London Critics’ Circle Film Awards, at BFI Southbank, Belvedere Road, London. Not to be confused with the Critics Choice Awards, the Golden Globe, the Oscars, the BAsildon Critics Choice Awards and many more…. The Artist won big – and will win big at the Oscars.

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Michael Fassbender and Carey Mulligan arriving for the 2012 London Critics' Circle Film Awards, at BFI Southbank, Belvedere Road, London.

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Posted: 19th, January 2012 | In: Film | Comment


In photos – The Golden Globes 2012 (every dress and pose)

THE Golden Globes 2012 – in photos – the show that features Ricky Gervais saying mean things to the famous mongs, who chortle along and leave their table drinks well alone. No-one is ever filmed drinking at the Golden Globes. This is becasues: a) everyone is a lizard; b) faces are more frozen than the ice cubes; c) though more people watch America’s porn genre than 90% of Hollywood films, the place is a haven for prudes..

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Giuliana Rancic arrives at the 69th Annual Golden Globe Awards Sunday, Jan. 15, 2012, in Los Angeles. (AP Photo/Matt Sayles)

Posted: 16th, January 2012 | In: Film | Comment


In pictures: Critics’ Choice Awards 2012 – Clooney and The Artist win big

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From left, Viola Davis, Allison Janney and Emma Stone walk onstage to accept the award for best acting ensemble for "The Help" during the 17th Annual Critics' Choice Movie Awards on Thursday, Jan. 12, 2012 in Los Angeles. (AP Photo/Chris Pizzello)

Sean Penn to receive Joel Siegel Award at 2012 CCMA’s
More Movie Awards Archives Coming Soon!
17th Annual Critics’ Choice Movie Awards (2012) – Best Picture: The Artist

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Posted: 13th, January 2012 | In: Film | Comment


Madonna’s W.E. premiere in London – in photos

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Madonna arriving for the UK Premiere of W.E. at Odeon Kensington High Street, London.

MADONNA looked fantastic at the UK Premiere of W.E. at Odeon Kensington High Street, London. It’s the bipic in which Andrea Riseborough plays Wallis Simpson and James D’Arcy does the abdicated King Edward VIII. Crowds flocked.

Posted: 12th, January 2012 | In: Film | Comment


Warhorse Premiere photos: Kate Middleton brings the allergies

TO the Premiere of the firm Warhorse, featuring Kate Middelton, the Duchess of Cambridge, who is allergic to horses. Well, that’s what she tells Princes Anne and the rest of the gang…

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The Duke and Duchess of Cambridge arriving for the UK premiere of War Horse, at the Odeon Leicester Square, London.

 

Posted: 9th, January 2012 | In: Film | Comment


Benedict Cumberbatch to play Khan in Star Trek 2

SHERLOCK is what Benedict Cumberbatch is best known for, but soon, he’ll be tackling the legacy of the mighty Ricardo Montalban (mighty mainly because of his funny name and the fact he wore a false chest in The Wrath Of Khan and starred in Crossroads) as he plays Khan in the new Star Trek movie.

Yessum, Cumberbatch has been cast in J.J. Abrams’ sequel to his 2009 “Star Trek” rehash.

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Posted: 5th, January 2012 | In: Film | Comment