Anorak

Key Posts | Anorak

Key Posts Category

When F Scott Fitzgerald and Ernest Hemingway compared penis size

Just as men took up painting to spend time with naked men and women, many famous writers were also preoccupied with sex. In A Moveable Feast, Ernest Hemingway notes the time he and fellow novelist F. Scott Fitzgerald, compared penis size:

In the time after Zelda had what was then called her first nervous breakdown and we happened to be in Paris at the same time, Scott asked me to have lunch with him at Michaud’s restaurant on the corner of the rue Jacob and the rue des Saints-Pères. He said he had something very important to ask me that meant more than anything in the world to him and that I must answer absolutely truly.

[…]

I kept waiting for it to come, the thing that I had to tell the absolute truth about; but he would not bring it up until the end of the meal, as though we were having a business lunch.

Finally when we were eating the cherry tart and had a last carafe of wine he said, “You know I never slept with anyone except Zelda.”

“No, I didn’t.”

“I thought I had told you.”

“No. You told me a lot of things but not that.”

“That is what I have to ask you about.”

“Good. Go on.”

“Zelda said that the way I was built I could never make any woman happy and that was what upset her originally. She said it was a matter of measurements. I have never felt the same since she said that and I have to know truly.”

“Come out to the office,” I said.

“Where is the office?”

Le water,” I said.

We came back into the room and sat down at the table.

“You’re perfectly fine,” I said. “You are O.K. There’s nothing wrong with you. You look at yourself from above and you look foreshortened. Go over to the Louvre and look at the people in the statues and then go home and look at yourself in the mirror in profile.”

“Those statues may not be accurate.”

“They are pretty good. Most people would settle for them.”

“But why would she say it?”

“To put you out of business. That’s the oldest way in the world of putting people out of business. Scott, you asked me to tell you the truth and I can tell you a lot more but this is the absolute truth and all you need. You could have gone to see a doctor.”

“I didn’t want to. I wanted you to tell me truly.”

“Now do you believe me?”

“I don’t know,” he said.

“Come on over to the Louvre,” I said. “It’s just down the street and across the river.”

We went over to the Louvre and he looked at the statues but still he was doubtful about himself.

“It is not basically a question of the size in repose,” I said. “It is the size that it becomes. It is also a question of angle.” I explained to him about using a pillow and a few other things that might be useful for him to know.

A pillow to rest our head upon when you lie down, pick up a good book and forget about it.

Spotter: BB; Flashbak

Posted: 15th, January 2021 | In: Celebrities, Key Posts | Comment


Elizabeth was not ready for the Trump Revolution

Elizabeth came to Washington DC from Knoxville, Tennessee, to march for Donald Trump.  She made it a foot inside the Capital before she says she was maced and forced back outside. Elizabeth is upset. Elizabeth was not ready to the Revolution.

Posted: 8th, January 2021 | In: Key Posts, News, Politicians | Comment


Hear James Baldwin’s great record collection on a Spotify playlist

Allan warren - Own work
James Baldwin taken Hyde Park, London Spotify

You can hear American writer James Baldwin’s record collection as Spotify playlist. In his hymned work Another Country, Baldwin hailed the creative power of music:

The beat: hands, feet, tambourines, drums, pianos, laughter, curses, razor blades: the man stiffening with a laugh and a growl and a purr and the woman moistening and softening with a whisper and a sigh and a cry. The beat – in Harlem in the summertime one could almost see it, shaking above the pavements and the roof.

Ikechúkwú Onyewuenyi, a curator at the Hammer Museum in Los Angeles, has gone further, creating a playlist of Baldwin’s listening. “I latched onto his records, their sonic ambience,” says Onyewuenyi. “In addition to reading the books and essays, listening to the records was something that could transport me there.”

Image: CC – Allan Warren – James Baldwin taken Hyde Park, London

Spotter: FlashbakHyperallergic

Posted: 31st, December 2020 | In: Key Posts, Music | Comment


Covid-19: A Shot at freedom but new war on NHS looms

Covid-19 has infected pretty much the entire country’s mainstream media with support for the Government’s upbeat diagnoses. With Brexit done, the UK’s negotiators can sit down with Covid-19 and hammer out a deal. You might suppose the virus is setting the agenda, but Priti Patel, the Home Secretary, says the country is “ahead of the curve”. Where Britain goes Covid follows – whether we go train, jet or big red bus.

Take the Labour-supporting Daily Mirror‘s lead news story. “Lockdowns could end as soon as February if the Oxford vaccine gets the nod from regulators within days,” says the tabloid. Could. If. Circumspection get thee hence. This is a “SHOT AT FREEDOM” – rather like the other vaccine lots of Britons have been injected with, which was also a shot at freedom.

Covid tabloid review
Then
Covid tabloid review

At least the Express deals in fact, declaring, “WE WILL BE FREE BY FEBRUARY.” Fact. Well, if the regulators approve the Oxford-AstraZeneca vaccine, which could happen…

Covid tabloid review

The Daily Telegraph and Daily Mail deliver the numbers: 10,000 medics and volunteers have been recruited by the NHS to help deliver the freedom vaccine. You can get the jab in sports stadiums and racecourses, says the Telegraph. The Mail suggests getting “a jab in your village hall”. (You getting an insight into how papers view their readers?)

An unnamed source tells the paper: “The vaccine is the way to make us safe and get us through this pandemic. We are throwing the kitchen sink at it”. Now wash your hands at the standpipe.

There is one dissenting voice. The Guardian looks at other ‘coulds’ and ‘ifs’. Dr Adrian James, president of the Royal College of Psychiatrists, says Covid-19 poses the greatest threat to mental health since World War Two. But even that’s not scary enough so the Guardian mutates his opinion into: “NHS urged to prepare for ‘biggest threat since world war’.”

As war looms, the Guardian says war continues. NHS staff have been denied the Pfizer/BioNTech vaccine, leaving doctors “scrabbling” to get immunised. A survey of medics finds “fear the government’s decision to prioritise over-80s and care home staff over health workers has left them at risk of catching the disease”.

The remedy is clear: get some Sun.

It’s gonna be great.

Posted: 28th, December 2020 | In: Key Posts, News, Tabloids | Comment


Having sex through a keyhole with tubby Prince Andrew

The Mail has an “explosive dossier” on Prince Andrew and a woman who claims she had sex with him when she was a teenager, Virginia Giuffre Roberts. It is “a bombshell” Daily Mail investigation circling the claim Roberts was trafficked to London by the prince’s paedophile friend Jeffrey Epstein when she was just 17 and forced to have sex with him.

You’ll quickly form the idea that there’s a lot of hearsay and titillation in the Mail’s Whoopee Cushion. But the hope is that the bit about the alleged sex will get readers panting.

And what of the facts? The paper’s headline suggests that the bath Roberts says she and Andrew had sex in might be too small for penetration. The Mail combines sex and alleged sex crimes with looking around someone else’s home. A fetish that might be on the fringes of the web is mainstream.

We’re going prowlin’ and peepin’ because “an exclusive through-the-keyhole view shows the bathroom in Ghislaine Maxwell’s mews house in Belgravia.” Don’t worry. She’s not in the tub. Maxwell, another of Andrew’s old muckers, is locked inside the US justice system. She faces six counts of recruiting and grooming girls and young women to be sexually abused by both her and Epstein. Prince Andrew told the BBC that he had first met Epstein through his girlfriend Ghislaine Maxwell in 1999. That’s them and Roberts in the photo above.

Inside the house where Virginia Roberts and Prince Andrew had ‘sex in the bath’ – so is the tub REALLY too small for two people to fit like Ghislaine Maxwell claims?

Dressing up reporters as chickens is one thing but surely the Mail didn’t mock up the Maxwell backroom and encourage two hacks to play the parts of Andrew and his alleged victim? No. Rules on social distancing forbid such things. They just looked at old planning records:

We have found a floorplan of the bathroom, taken from a 1987 planning application. We have also had access to much more recent images of the room. There are two observations. One is that the bathroom is indeed ‘small’, as both sides agree; cramped, if one wished to perform anything other than solo ablutions.

Oh, hark at the language. “One.” Is solo “ablutions” faux posho for masturbation?

The historic plan shows a ‘standard size’ — 5ft 6in by 2ft 4in — alcove bath, boxed in on two sides by walls and on a third by the back of the airing cupboard. The remaining 36 sq ft is largely taken up by a bidet, a lavatory and large sink. It is very bijou.

If size matters, should we also be told Andrew’s dimensions and also those of his alleged. victim? And given what we know about sex, isn’t the sink large enough – or the keyhole?

Andrew denies any wrongdoing. His “only defence against Miss Roberts’ detailed accusations remains blunt denial” says the Mail. Which makes you wonder if the paper’s explosive dossier went off in a confined space, the protected prince would be covered in anything but the stench of his own glory hole.

Posted: 12th, December 2020 | In: Key Posts, News, Royal Family, Tabloids | Comment


London pub takes order for one Scotch Egg and 63 pints

Tier 2-ers can order a Scotch Egg and thus legally order alcohol to float it in. According to the rules, a Scotch egg is a “substantial meal”, something that must be ordered if you want to drink in the pub. Pubs can order or make a load of Scotch eggs and lob them at the punters. And it does not have to be large Scotch egg – containing a full hard or soft boiled egg wrapped in pork and breadcrumbs – it can be a Scotch egg of any size.

And so to a pub in London, where an order has gone in for 63 pints of beer, 12 glasses of wine and one Scotch egg:

Yeah, a Chorizo Scotch egg, which sounds revolting.

Posted: 9th, December 2020 | In: Key Posts, News, Strange But True | Comment


Madeleine McCann Watch: German PR Prosecutor Hans Christian Wolters has 7 more years to nail Christian Brueckner

On the day Margaret Keenan, who turns 91 next week, became the first person in the UK to receive the Covid-19 vaccine, news breaks of Madeleine McCann. As the pandemic begins to end, media press f9 on the keyboard and inject a dose of the innocent child they recreated as ‘Our Maddie’.

And it’s not news at all. It’s on the BBC news website – the second top story. But the story is only that German prosecutor Hans Christian Wolters thinks Christian Brueckner kidnapped and murdered the child. Of this he is “very confident”.

Brueckner is in a German prison serving time for drug smuggling and rape. The 43 year old criminal was identified as a suspect in June. And six months on prosecutors do not have enough evidence to charge him.

So Wolters is reduced to guffing out PR and what sounds like a shakedown:

“If you knew the evidence we had you would come to the same conclusion as I do but I can’t give you details because we don’t want the accused to know what we have on him – these are tactical considerations.”

As he looks for evidence that leads to proof and a safe conviction, we turn away from grandstanding Hans to hear from Met Police commissioner Dame Cressida Dick, who says Operation Grange is a missing person inquiry as there is no “definitive evidence whether Madeleine is alive or dead”.

But Wolters has time to burnish his media profile. Last month the suspect lost an appeal against a further seven-year sentence for rape. So we can expect more of Hans and what he believes for some time to come.

“I can’t promise, I can’t guarantee that we have enough to bring a charge, ” says Hans Wolters, “but I’m very confident because what we have so far doesn’t allow any other conclusion at all.”

Better to keep an open mind, a tad of circumspection, especially when you’ve yet to get any hard evidence and are dealing with circumstantial evidence and an open case. But the TV camera tolls and Hans Wolters is ready for his close up…

Posted: 8th, December 2020 | In: Key Posts, Madeleine McCann, News | Comment


Roald Dahl was a hardcore anti-Semite – but hating Jews is ok

Roald Dahl is dead. He’s been dead since 1990. He was a brilliant writer for children. Buried on his official website run by his estate is an apology for his brazen and unalloyed anti-Semitism. “The Dahl family and the Roald Dahl Story Company deeply apologise for the lasting and understandable hurt caused by some of Roald Dahl’s statements,” goes the comment.

Jews, eh, those folk devils for Christian culture. Lots of talented people are and have been Jew haters. It goes with the territory of being a Jew living amongst non-Jews to experience the slights and slurs. It’s part of the culture.

The New Statesman printed this gem from Dahl in 1983, part of an interview with the writer: “There is a trait in the Jewish character that does provoke animosity, maybe it’s a kind of lack of generosity towards non-Jews… Even a stinker like Hitler didn’t just pick on them for no reason.”

That in the New Statesman, which much later came up with this explainer for everything wrong with the world and your life:

anti-Semitic new statesman kosher conspiracy
The Labour Party supporting New Statesman had a question that might have been rhetorical.

The Dahl family apology adds: “Those prejudiced remarks are incomprehensible to us and stand in marked contrast to the man we knew and to the values at the heart of Roald Dahl’s stories, which have positively impacted young people for generations. We hope that, just as he did at his best, at his absolute worst, Roald Dahl can help remind us of the lasting impact of words.”

But why apologise now, thirty years after Dahl’s death? Is it all about money? They’ve done rather well flogging his stuff, despite of what Dahl said about Jewish power:

“It’s the same old thing: we all know about Jews and the rest of it. There aren’t any non-Jewish publishers anywhere, they control the media – jolly clever thing to do – that’s why the president of the United States has to sell all this stuff to Israel.”

Hating Jews is ok, say the anti-Semites. It is systemic, of course, because it tells Jews that they are the problem. Sure Hitler was a mass murdering anti-Semite but it wasn’t his fault, see. It was theirs. It is not punching down to hate Jews. It is punching up. It is their differences from the norm, their faces, culture and very being that need correcting. That’s how systemic racism works. It pitches the minority as an ugly otherness in need of fixing.

When two Jewish children wrote to Dahl, his reply was, well, take a look:

Dear Mr Dahl, We love your books, but we have a problem … we are Jews!! We love your books but you don’t like us because we are Jews. That offends us! Can you please change your mind about what you said about Jews. Love, Aliza and Tamar.

Dahl replied that he against not Jews but “injustice”. Jews are fair game. Attacking Jews does not make you racist say the liberal idealists in their Islington town houses and Suffolk parlours. It makes you just and righteous.

But it won’t matter. Shakespeare and Dickens are rife with anti-semitism. Shylock and Fagin are characters that reinforce and pander to the readers’ prejudices. They’re on every classroom reading lists.

“If a person has ugly thoughts,” Dahl writes in The Twits, “it begins to show on the face.” Do we could dig him up, give him the once over and beat him with sticks? No need. No point. Hating Jews is the oldest story in Christendom. And everyone loves a story…

Posted: 7th, December 2020 | In: Celebrities, Key Posts, News | Comment


Robbie Savage, gambling on Spurs and the Mirror’s journalism of attachment

After Spurs easily saw off Arsenal with a 2-0 win, BBC radio DJ and Daily Mirror columnist Robbie Savage told his Twitter followers: “I went early on Spurs winning the league 🤷‍♂️💙⚽️ 08085909693 ,,, tell me why the won’t ? Tom the arsenal fans said arsenal would win the league this year ,, 😂🤦🏻‍♂️ 08085909693 #bbc606.”

Tom the Arsenal fans is clearly delusional, unable to see that club manager Mikel Arteta is learning on the job and the Gunners squad is populated by many players who’d struggle to get a game for Fulham. But what of Savage and his to-deadline opinions? You can find out more of what Savage thinks at the Daily Mirror:

Robbie Savage Spurs

In order, this is how Savage predicted the Premier League table, from first to last: Liverpool; Manchester United; Chelsea; Manchester City; ARSENAL; Wolves; Spurs… So that’s Spurs in 7th place, two behind Arsenal.

This guesswork is brought to readers in association with the Mirror’s latest betting partner. It might be that Savage didn’t write the thing, just saw his name added to to the top to give it a bit of omph and authenticity. After all he’s an ex-pro who works for the State broadcaster. You can trust him. Savage might know a thing or two. So place your bets!

Given the damaging impact gambling can have on people’s lives and that the Mirror pitching Savage’s words in an article which encourages betting – the prediction piece ends with a large button stating “BET HERE” – might it be useful to tell readers that Savage’s views are liable to change with the wind?

A radio phone-in is a bit of fun, a distraction from the important things in life. Losing your money and health because those same opinions encouraged you to gamble is far more serious.

Posted: 7th, December 2020 | In: Arsenal, Back pages, Key Posts, Money, Sports, Spurs, Tabloids | Comment


Covid-19 vaccine: Britain is world leader at panic buying

The Sun says Britain “beat the world to get a vaccine”. The Telegraph says the UK “leads the Western world” and talks of “Covid Liberation Day”. We’re “first in the WORLD” says the Mail. The jab is a marker in “victory over Covid-19” adds the Sun. It is “V-Day” guffs the Metro.

How the UK beat the world is by judging the Pfizer/BioNTech safe for use and ordering millions of doses of the stuff. We bought it first! The UK rules the world at queuing and possibly panic buying – although we’re not told which if any other nations were also standing in line. Was it just us?

Why the UK is first is unexplained. Was it a political decision? Did Brexit make us first?

The Daily Express accuses the European Medical Agency of “sour grapes” for criticising the UK’s “speedy approval” of the vaccine. Ministers say Brexit had “freed” the country from Brussels red tape. The medical regulator insists it had been working under European law. The virus is a propaganda tool. Mass death and fear always hosted political capital.

One minister tweeted that this is the moment Britain “led humanity’s charge against this disease”. Germany’s ambassador to Britain replied: “Why is it so difficult to recognize this important step forward as a great international effort and success.” Britain is governed by EU law, so argument is a specious one.

The upshot is that Britain’s medicines regulator, the MHRA, says the jab, which offers up to 95% protection against Covid-19 illness, is safe. So there it is. A vaccine designed in the USA and made in Belgium is billed as a victory for the UK and a jab in the eye to Johnny Foreigner. A medicine passed safe for human use after ten months rather than the ten years a drug typically takes to get approval is fine. You might even get one in time for Christmas, says the Sun, positioning the vaccine as a kind of seasonal gift. Perfume for her. Gadget for him. Needle in the arm for granny.

Health secretary Matt Hancock says the vaccine “is a triumph for all those who believe in science”. Believe. Not trust in human ingenuity. But actually believe in science, like you would believe in a religion. And the UK is science’s most loyal disciple.

And so to the jab. Downing Street press secretary Allegra Stratton says Boris Johnson would not rule out receiving the vaccine jab live on television. And there’s the rub: it’s a PR matter. The vaccine is coming. But do you want it?

And so to the jab. Downing Street press secretary Allegra Stratton says Boris Johnson would not rule out receiving the vaccine jab live on television. And there’s the rub: it’s a PR matter. The vaccine is coming. But do you want it?

PS: Maybe they inject Boris with a truth serum?

Posted: 3rd, December 2020 | In: Broadsheets, Key Posts, News, Tabloids | Comment


Government declares Christmas Truce in War with Covid-19 – virus considering position

“Christmas is saved,” says the Express. It’s “Bubbles with the baubles” trills the Metro – up to four households may be allowed to mix during the festive season. “Ho Ho Homes to Mix,” says the Sun. “Xmas gets go-ahead” is the Daily Mirror‘s lead. The Daily Mail wonders, “Who’ll be in your festive bubble?” The Government has declared a Christmas truce in the war with Covid-19.

As Britishers pop their heads over the parapets, taking part in funerals, prisoner swaps (you mean visiting granny in the care home? – ed), carol-singing and a football match, there is no guarantee that Covid-19 will play along.

As such, fraternising with the enemy should be avoided until a spokesman for Covid-19 – Dominic Cummings, Ivanka Trump or the bloke from Blue Peter who usually does panto but is available at a moment’s notice for other paid work? – tells us otherwise.

Helping to make sense of it all is our resident expert, Mr A. Turkey, who confides: “Whatever they dish up at such a wonderful time of the year, I’m in!”

Lead image: British and Germ(ans)s take a break from the mass killings to get their hair cut and talk about the war.

Posted: 23rd, November 2020 | In: Key Posts, News, Tabloids | Comment


Day Of the Dead: Buy Jose Posada’s Calavera T-shirts, cards, bags, prints and magnets

Mexican illustrator José Guadalupe Posada (1851 – 1913) is best remembered for his calaveras, representations of the human skull and skeleton seen in Mexico’s annual celebration the Day of the Dead ( Día de Muertos; October 31st – November 2nd).

Posada began creating calaveras in 1880 for publication in Antonio Vanegas Arroyo’s inexpensive coloured broadsides sold in markets, on the streets and at festivals.

Posada depicted animated skeletons at work, dancing, playing instruments, mourning the dead, illustrating rhyming ballads (corridos) and stories about love affairs. The stories and Posada’s art expressed the social and political concerns of the period. Death lampooned the vain and rich, including Mexico’s dictator Porfirio Díaz. In Posada’s calaveras, shorn of finery, rank and flesh, everyone was equal.

On January 20th 1913, 3 years after the start of the Mexican Revolution, José Guadalupe Posada died penniless. He was buried in an unmarked grave. In the 1920s that his work was rediscovered and hailed by French ex-patriot artist Jean Charlot who described Posada as “printmaker to the Mexican people”.

Flashbak Shop has prints of Posada’s brilliant work, plus bags, terrific magnet sets and T-shirts. Take a look here.

Check out the Calavera items on the Flashbak Shop.

Posted: 11th, November 2020 | In: Key Posts, The Consumer | Comment


ABC News: England parties likes its 1605 as Joe Biden win triggers fireworks extravaganza

Joe Biden is declared President of the US of A – and the country’s ABC News reports that the skies over London, England, have erupted in an explosion of light and sound to mark the happy occasion. Keen historians with access to big books and bigger brains (or just the internet – ed) will find it uncanny that the celebration for Catholic Biden should coincide with what Englanders call “Guy Fawkes’ Night”, an event that remembers when Fawkes and a group of fellow English Catholics launched a failed attempt to blow up King James I (1566-1625) and the Parliament on November 5, 1605.

Says one American reporter: “I’m getting rumours of a huge celebration on December 24, with bells, tinsel and a play to be performed in all English schools in which Joseph ‘Joe’ Biden and Mary Trump give birth to a new beginning for all mankind.”

Says no-one: “Are those drones?”

Posted: 9th, November 2020 | In: Key Posts, News | Comment


Bank wants children for its ‘WANK Coloring contest’

Wank the dog

To Japan, where the Nishi-Nippon City Bank invited children in Nagasaki. to colour in the bank’s mascot. Just add come colours to Wank The Dog.

From the bank’s website:

The popular event “Wank Coloring Contest” , which was held at the West Japan City Bank last year and attracted more than 2,000 works , is coming to the city of Nagasaki this year! Whether you are familiar with Wank or not , be sure to wield your arm for a gorgeous prize !

Wank the dog

The contest will be judged by Groovevisions, who created the “timeless” Wank The Dog. Entries are limited to one WANK per person.

Posted: 5th, November 2020 | In: Key Posts, Money, Strange But True | Comment


President Senile or President Lunatic – America decides

Can everything you want to know about the US election be summed up in a tabloid headline? The Daily Star achieves no little success with its front page:

President SEnile Biden

President Senile or President Lunatic? Vote now!

Posted: 5th, November 2020 | In: Key Posts, News, Politicians, Tabloids | Comment


New Yorker Leonard Shoulders falls into a sinkhole full of rats

Leonard Shoulders (real name), 33, was waiting for a bus in the Bronx, New York. Without warning, a sinkhole opened up beneath him. He fell in. He landed atop a pack of rats. Afraid of one crawling into his mouth, Leonard Shoulders kept his lips sealed. Unable to scream, he waited, enduring the horror and the pain from broken arm and leg. His brother tells the New York Daily News:

“He couldn’t move, and the rats were crawling all over him. He didn’t scream, because he didn’t want the rats going into his mouth.”

Leonard Shoulders (that name…) is now recovering in hospital.

In other news: New York City turkey farmer worries about shortage of meat for Christmas hotdogs.

killer giant invading german scottish rats britain daily star, daily express tabloids

Posted: 30th, October 2020 | In: Key Posts, Strange But True | Comment


The best Christmas cards delivered to your door

Over on Flashbak, they’ve greeting cards for any and every occasion. There are birthday cards, Christmas cards, cards for love and cards that simply say ‘I’m thinking of you’.

These greetings cards are printed on high-quality 330gsm Fedrigoni card. They come delivered to your door. Cards are either A5 or 5×7 and can be ordered as singles or packs of 10.

Shooting Star – From Les Etoiles; Derniere Feerie by Joseph Mery and illustrated by J.J. Grandville, 1847.
Utagawa Hiroshige – Drum bridge at Meguro and Sunset Hill, 1857 Meguro taikobashi yūhinooka (The Drum Bridge at Meguro and Yuhi (or Sunset) Hill). Ukiyo-e print shows hows pedestrians crossing a stone bridge during a snowstorm.
Mano Poderosa (The All-Powerful Hand), or Las Cinco Personas (The Five Persons), 19th century. Oil on metal (possibly tin-plated iron), Mexico, Brooklyn Museum.
Comet – Illustration from French satirical magazine ‘L’Assiette au Beurre’, 1910. Artist Unknown.
Leonid Meteor Shower Over Niagara Falls -1892 – Illustration from Edmund Weiss, Bilder-Atlas der Sternenwelt [Image atlas of the star world], Stuttgart, 1892 via Smithsonian Library Washington DC.
FUCK 2020 featuring Santa Claus With a Handgun by Will Crawford – 1912.
Louis Wain, Three Cats Singing, c. 1925, Greeting Card
Utagawa Hiroshige (Japanese 歌川 広重), aka Andō Hiroshige (Japanese 安藤 広重; 1797 – 12 October 1858) : Travellers on horseback in the snow, woodblock colour print. between circa 1835 and circa 1837.

See the full range of Christmas cards on the Flashbak Shop.

Posted: 27th, October 2020 | In: Key Posts, The Consumer | Comment


Spell out your name and desires with these fantastic erotic alphabet fridge magnets (NSFW)

A bloke one revealed that NORWICH was not his favourite football team, but an acronym he’d send his wife. The other liberty he’d take was to have the leading ‘N’ stand for’ Knickers’. As you try to work out the code, you might like to cook up of of your or just spell the entire message and stick it to your fridge with these fantastic fridge magnets featuring Joseph Apoux’s Erotic Alphabet of 1880.

Flashbak has fine range of merchandise featuring the racy letters, including prints for each letter (perfect for the smallest room), and a great set of stickers. And these magnets are every bit as good. You can buy the full 26 letters on three economical sheets, or each letter as an individual magnet in a choice of three sizes.

  • It’s ‘Knickers Off Ready When I Come Home’.

Posted: 21st, October 2020 | In: Key Posts, The Consumer | Comment


New Covid Tier Rules Explained: Boris Johnson can meet a tech guru for a ‘working lunch’ in a Manchester hotel room

Manchester covid

How do you report on the pandemic, the confusion sewn by a government with all the nous of a puppy sat by a pile of poo and Boris Johnson air-punching Manchester mayor Andy Burnham on the telly, treating him and the city with all the contempt of a bully thanking his victim for bringing so much lunch money to school.? If you’re the Sun you lead with Meghan Markle in a green dress and pictures of a “takeaway food app addict” being hoisted from his Surrey flat, before presumably being dropped on Salford as an emergency fuel source.

Helpfully, the Express does lead with the Covid-19 story, telling us: “Only National Unity Will Defeat Virus”. Which means: comply or die. Which sounds like a threat. Question the Government and you risk lives. Comply with the Government and your business will go bust, you’ll run out money and die from curable cancers. But you’ll do so in the warm glow that it was for the common good – especially for the NHS which must be “saved” for when we rally need health care and granny, who’s seen neither the outside world not any loved ones for months.

The Mirror says Johnson’s “playing poker with the pandemic”, which makes him sound more fun than fool. Such is the tabloid’s love of betting apps and deals that fill the pages, you expect to see the story sponsored by Paddy Power and a shot of Johnson pulling down his trousers to reveal a pair of green knickers on which are displayed the odds for “everyone dead by teatime”.

The aforesaid Burnham wanted £65m to “prevent a winter of real hardship”. Johnson and his chums offered £60m. They then handed over £22m and forced a Tier 3 lockdown on Manchester. That £60m might still be on the table. But Johnson did his usual bluster and bluff and failed to answer questions about what is on offer and what is not.

We know Johnson thinks Tier 3 is fine and the following venues throughout Manchester must shut or else: bars, unless they serve meals, betting shops, casinos, Bingo halls, games arcades and soft play areas.” You know, all the places Johnson and his Government spend the evening when the lap dancing club is full.

But there is help. The Star brings news: work in the pub. People from different households in different tiers can mix indoors if they are doing work. Call it a “working lunch” and you can mix indoors. “People are permitted to meet indoors for work purposes in high or very high areas,” says an unidentified Government wonk. If Johnson (London – Tier 2) wants to meet a tech guru in a Manchester hotel room, (Tier 3), he can.

Just remember to bring your own pole.

Posted: 21st, October 2020 | In: Key Posts, News, Tabloids | Comment


Scotland’s drinkers accept Nicola Sturgeon’s Covid-19 challenge to booze outdoors

Nicola Sturgeon likes things to be short and sharp – and you’d imagine her husband does, too. Scotland’s First Minister (her) says the decree to shut all pubs, bars and restaurants in central Scotland from 6pm this Friday until October 25 is “intended to be short, sharp action to arrest a worrying increase in infection”. This lock out will stop the rise in coronavirus cases.

In other bits of Scotland, licensed premises can serve alcohol outdoors. The people of Scotland accept the challenge:

Brave heart (freezing cold arse).

Posted: 8th, October 2020 | In: Key Posts, News, Politicians | Comment


Of course Facebook banned QAnon – it’s part of the conspiracy

Hard cheese on anyone searching for QAnon conspiracy theory stuff on Facebook. The publisher, sorry, social media platform has banned all mention of the group that blames all bad things on a shadowy cabal of elite Satan-worshipping paedophiles. According to theory, only Donald Trump can defeat the blood-sucking child killers.

QAnon believers claim someone called Q is sending them coded messages about Donald Trump’s war with the ‘deep state’. It is, as with all conspiracy theories, utterly devoid of evidence or proof. But if you believe the CIA murdered JFK, that Barack Obama was not born in the USA, the moon landings were faked, Prince Philip offed Princess Diana, VIP paedophiles were murdering children in Westminster or that the 9/11 terror attacks were carried out by the Jews (most conspiracy theories end with the Jews), banning all mention of such things will not change your mind. It will most likely make you believe your theory all the more. Why ban the ridiculous and not debunk it? Facebook is surely just in on the conspiracy, right? Rebuttal is proof. Not that conspiracies requires proof, relying instead on unblinking faith and an open-eyed belief in a reality that transcends mere fact.

ted heath
Conspiracy theories are mainstream
anti-Semitic new statesman kosher conspiracy
If in doubt, blame the Jews

But the really deal with conspiracy theories is that they are entertaining, give good telly, sell lots of books and distract you from the truth. You know, that we are all controlled by a lizard called Brenda?

Posted: 7th, October 2020 | In: Key Posts, News | Comment


Buy prints from the Mark Weiss Rock Legends Archive – wow!

Mark “WEISSGUY” Weiss is a world-renowned photographer who has traveled the globe photographing music legends from Van Halen, Ozzy Osbourne, Debbie Harry, The Clash, Prince, Queen, The Ramones, Aerosmith, and Mötley Crüe to Metallica, Guns N’ Roses, Bon Jovi, and KISS. Weiss’s images capture the artists onstage, backstage and behind the scenes. His images are now available to buy at the brilliant Flashbak Prints Shop.

He visually documented historic events including the US Festival, Live Aid, the Moscow Music Peace Festival, and the PMRC hearings in Wash­ington, DC. His photographs have been pub­lished in thousands of magazines worldwide, and he is responsible for two of the era’s defin­ing album covers, Bon Jovi’s Slippery When Wet and Twisted Sister’s Stay Hungry. His inimitable photographs helped craft the visual imagery of rock and metal in the 1980s.

Growing up in Matawan, New Jersey, Mark made a deal with a neighbor at thirteen years old to mow his lawn for the summer in exchange for a 35mm camera. He then filled his teenage nights sneaking into concerts to shoot the biggest acts of the ’70s. After being arrested for selling photographs outside a KISS concert in 1977, he walked into the offices of Circus with his portfolio and soon landed his first centerfold spread – a photo of Aerosmith’s Steven Tyler. Soon after, he became the publication’s staff photographer.

In the years to come, Mark became a fan favorite and a star in his own right, with a Creem magazine reader’s poll ranking him as one of rock’s top photographers of the era. 

Rock prints

Buy the prints her – you can get the signed by Mrs or unsigned. Either way the quality is outstanding.

Posted: 7th, October 2020 | In: Key Posts, The Consumer | Comment


Everyone Murdered By Teatime – watch a strange Soviet film from 1966

This Soviet film from 1966 presents a series of murders seemingly without end. The perpetrator becomes the next victim. And then… Well, you can watch it and see what occurs:

Spotter: Boing Boing

Posted: 5th, October 2020 | In: Film, Key Posts | Comment


Alexander Dorogokupetz : the teenager who threw eggs at Frank Sinatra and lived to tell the tale

On Flashbak the story of Alexander Dorogokupetz, the 18-year-old who carried a small bag containing three eggs into a Frank Sinatra concert and tossed them at the singer. He struck a few days after the so-called Columbus Day riot, when as many as 35,000 bobbysoxers overwhelmed the area around New York City’s Paramount Theatre for a chance to see the return of the dreamy Frank Sinatra.

There was a lot that irritated Dorogokupetz about Sinatra and his fans. In particular, the bow ties frustrated him, those famous bow ties they were famous for wearing. Why, he thought, did people say he looked like Sinatra if he wore one, and not that Sinatra looked like him? He had a collection of two hundred bow ties at home, and had got his first when he was seven years old. Bow ties were his thing, not Sinatra’s.

There was a lot that irritated Dorogokupetz about Sinatra and his fans. In particular, the bow ties frustrated him, those famous bow ties they were famous for wearing. Why, he thought, did people say he looked like Sinatra if he wore one, and not that Sinatra looked like him? He had a collection of two hundred bow ties at home, and had got his first when he was seven years old. Bow ties were his thing, not Sinatra’s.

Sinatra began singing I Don’t Know Why (I Just Do). This was what Dorogokupetz had wanted, a romantic song, the more romantic the better. He thought of himself as a singer too, having been in the choir at high school. Sometimes, he told people he was a better singer than Sinatra. As proof, he would sing a plaintive duet, done solo.

He threw the first egg gently, and missed. The second, more forceful, hit Sinatra between his eyes, as he was singing the first “you” of the song, his mouth open: “I don’t know why I love you…”

Sinatra stopped.

The third egg hit him on the chest of his gray suit, glancing his bow tie. For each egg, there was a gasp from the crowd. The “horde of female rug-cutters,” the papers said, “were confronted with the deliberate desecration of their bow-tie idol.” Someone shouted, “get the skunk who done it!”

The Teenager Who Egged Frank Sinatra And The Bobby Sox Riot – New York City, 1944

Posted: 1st, October 2020 | In: Celebrities, Key Posts, Music | Comment


Christmas Gifts: 26 Erotic Stickers from Joseph Apoux’s Alphabet Pornographique

Hold the satsuma. Stocking fillers come no fruitier than this collection of stickers featuring all 26 letters of Joseph Apoux’s Erotic Alphabet of 1880. A single print of the French artist’s ‘Alphabet pornographique’ and the A-Z as individual wall art are available as prints on fine art paper. But to customise a skateboard, laptop or book, the stickers are the tops.

Joseph Apoux's Alphabet Pornographique
Buy the Stickers here

The entire sheet measures 14inches square, and individual stickers are just over 5cm square. Two of the prints below give you an idea of how the designs appear as in the flesh. Global shipping is on offer. So you can send them as a gift to anyone anywhere.

Joseph Apoux's Alphabet Pornographique
Joseph Apoux's Alphabet Pornographique

Joseph Apoux’s Alphabet Pornographique and other delights are the Flashbak Shop.

Posted: 25th, September 2020 | In: Key Posts, The Consumer | Comment