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News | Anorak - Part 41

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A weird anti-masturbation video: beyond parody

jehovah masturbation video

 

This Jehovah Witness anti-masturbation training video contains parts reportedly from Watchtower, the sect’s magazine. It’s brought to us by former Jehovah’s Witness Lloyd Cedars. He notes:

Ever since realizing at the age of 30 that I had wasted decades of my life in a harmful, abusive cult, I have tried to channel my anger and frustration in positive ways – by creating content that can help those struggling with Jehovah’s Witness indoctrination begin thinking for themselves (preferably more quickly than I did)!

He says this about the video:

Two extremely sensitive videos have been leaked from inside Watchtower – one for men, and one for women. Both seem to be intended as induction videos for new “bethelites,” or workers at Jehovah’s Witness branches globally and the headquarters in New York.

Presented by Governing Body helpers Ralph Walls and Gary Breaux, the videos perfectly illustrate the extent to which Witness sex lives are policed, and give a glimpse of the religion’s growing paranoia about homosexuality.

The rebuttal for these videos is in production, and will be released on Saturday, January 27, 2018. There will also be an article about the videos on JWsurvey.org.

Please note: yes, the clips of Walls and Breaux are real! The only thing I’ve added is the music, the captions, and the stock footage. 🙂

 


Spotter: Boing Boing

Posted: 28th, January 2018 | In: News, Strange But True | Comment


Transfer balls: Benzema joins Arsenal for the umpteenth time

Karim Benzema is on his way to the Emirates. Yeah, really. Sports Illustrated announces: “Arsenal Strikes Deal to Bring Karim Benzema to the Emirates.” We’ve been here before. Many times. And before we turn to the Daily Mirror, the source of the SI’s scoop, a look at what we wrote in April 2017:

“Real Madrid striker Karim Benzema to be Alexis Sanchez replacement,” thundered the Daily Mirror.

Newspaper readers will know that Benzema joined Liverpool in 2014 (Daily Star) and Arsenal in 2015 (MetroDaily Star (twice), Daily TelegraphThe Sydney Morning Heraldand again in 2017 (The Sun). He never left Real Madrid. And today the papers are having another crack at the Benzema to Arsenal story.

And so to today’s Mirror: “Real Madrid star Karim Benzema has agreement with Arsene Wenger to join Arsenal but Gunners must improve bid.” And: “Real Madrid star Karim Benzema has agreed to join Arsene Wenger at Arsenal, according to reports.” What reports? “The 30-year-old would be welcomed at the Emirates and reports from Spain now suggest he has an agreement with Wenger.”

No link to any report and suggestions coming out of Spain. But the Express, however, does, linking to Diario Gol. Slap it through Google translate and you get:

On the sidelines, his immediate step points to London: as Diario Gol has learned, the player’s agreement with his compatriot / friend, Arsène Wenger , who wants him at Arsenal next summer, is total. The only problem is the figures of the transfer: the club ‘gunner’ does not exceed 40 million between fixed and variable Karim to maintain the cache. While Real Madrid requires a minimum of 60 ‘kilos’.

There’s not a single source for the story. But one orphaned report on a Spanish website enough for it to become a big story in the British mainstream media. And this in the Star:

 

 

And this from the Express:

 

“Karim Benzema has agreed to leave Real Madrid for Arsenal, according to reports,” says talkSport. Not so. It’s one claim reported on many times.

Benzema to Arsenal. We’ve heard it all before.

Such are the facts…

Posted: 27th, January 2018 | In: Arsenal, Back pages, News, Sports, Tabloids | Comment


Transfer balls: Arsenal target Aubameyang booed as Borussia prepare to lose out

Has Pierre-Emerick Aubameyang signed for Arsenal yet? No. Today the Gabon striker played for Borssia Dortmund in their 2-2 draw with with Freiburg in the Bundesliga. There is no news. Borussia Dortmund striker plays up front for Borussia Dortmund.

But the journalisomobile is in full cry. It won’t be stopped by fact alone. So the Mail thunders: “Borussia Dortmund hierarchy ready to ‘break up’ with Arsenal target Pierre-Emerick Aubameyang.”

Says who? The Mail’s story is pinned “according to Sky Sports Germany”. He “may” leaves, says the Mail. Or to put it another way, he may not. “Hans-Joachim Watske and Michael Zorc are understood to hold the opinion that it would be better for all parties involved to ‘break up’.”

 

 

‘Understood’ is shorthand for there are no quotes. But over on Sky Sports Germany there are no facts either. But we do get a photo of Dortmund fans displaying a message to Aubameyang: “No player is bigger than our club.”  Which the Standard garbles into the story: “Arsenal target Pierre-Emerick Aubameyang shunned by Borussia Dortmund fans with banner.” How can you be shunned and greeted by a 60ft banner? Maybe next week the fans will ignore Aubameyang with a plane trailing a huge banner featuring the legend “Pierre Who?”

As the fans boo their star, Borussia Dortmund sporting director Michael ZorcZorc tells Sky Sports Germany:

“We are prepared to implement a transfer under certain parameters – but only if these parameters are fully met. Arsenal has started several attempts so far. We have all rejected so far.

“Either our demands are fulfilled, then there can be another transfer, or else they will not be fulfilled and Auba will play in Dortmund until the summer, so it is also discussed and accepted by the Aubameyang family.”

Dortmund want £60m or else they’ll keep paying the player who wants to leave and upsets the fans and the team. Not much of an ultimatum is it…

 

Posted: 27th, January 2018 | In: Arsenal, Back pages, News, Sports, Tabloids | Comment


Blackstone’s Ratio and the rape of justie

Why are men being accused of rapes they did not commit? And why are men being being wrongfully arrested and charged? Do police have enough resources to investigate? Is it because police are too quick to believe a claim, not investigating with an open mind but enforcing an agenda that demands successful prosecution? William Blackstone opined that “it is better that 10 guilty persons escape than that one innocent suffer”. That thinking has been subverted by a culture that holds utter belief in the accuser. Guilt is assumed. Accusers are labelled ‘victims’ and ‘survivors’ with no need to hurdler barriers to justice.

And what of rape – has society redefined the crime? Do we consider a rapist someone who had sex in full knowledge their partner did not or could not consent? We should. Rape is not regretful sex. It’s much more serious than that.

It’s horrendous to be the victim of a malicious accusation. It’s also horrendous to believe you were raped and unable to secure justice and move on. Police need the resources and freedom to investigate and gather evidence. Their role must not be politicised.

The BBC reports:

 All current rape and serious sexual assault cases in England and Wales are to be reviewed “as a matter of urgency” to ensure evidence has been disclosed.

Why only current ones?

Director of Public Prosecutions Alison Saunders warned the review could see “a number of cases” dropped.

Warned? Who is being warned?

It comes after the collapse of several rape trials because evidence had not been shared with defence lawyers.

Those case should never have reached trial. Liam Allan, for one, was damaged by a system that ignored evidence of his innocence. The investigating officer failed to reveal evidence from the complainant’s phone that destroyed the prosecution’s case.

BBC legal correspondent Clive Coleman said there had been a failure to share digital evidence in each of the cases.

Back to Blackstone, then. If we think an innocent man could be prison for rape they did not commit, all rape and serious sexual assault cases should be looked at. Time to restore Blackstone’s Ratio to the justice system.

Spotter: BBC

Posted: 27th, January 2018 | In: News | Comment


Spurs balls: Mauricio Pochettino to join Real Madrid and understanding the expert

No sooner has Mauricio Pochettino been linked with the Real Madrid manager’s job then the BBC says the Spanish giants have made a move for him. This might be some news from Zinedine Zidane, the current boss of Real Madrid, who led them to back-to-back Champions’ League triumphs in the past two seasons. Real are having a poor season by their high standards, fourth in La Liga, a whopping 19 points shy of leaders Barcelona.

Inevitably talk turns to who next at Real. And for reasons not all that clear, Real apparently like the Spurs manager, who’s never won anything meaningful as a coach (four manager of the month awards is the total haul). Spurs are fifth in the Premier League. They are in the Champions League, their path to a Round of 16 tie with Juventus is decorated with a 3-1 home win over Real. There should be Rule for when bigger clubs approach the manager of a small club they’ve just lost to. (Maybe The Anorak Rule? The Sorene Rule?)

As for the facts “revealed” in the Mail’s report, well, get a load of this line:

Sportsmail understands that initial contact has been made between Real Madrid officials and associates of Pochettino. Sources in Spain believe he is tempted by the possibility of working at Real Madrid.

Not exactly replete with definites is it. But “Real have made Pochettino their first-choice target…. It is understood that Madrid would not want Pochettino to replace Zidane mid-season… Pochettino would be handed a significant transfer budget as the club attempt to return to the pinnacle of Spanish football.”

I was in agreement with all those believes and maybes until I read that part about Real Madrid spending big to secure success. Nah! Not Real with all those homegrown players and commitment to locality.

Helping us work out if Real really are going to make moves for Pochettino is Sky, which notes: “Real have shortlisted the Spurs boss to take over at the Bernabeu, according to Guillem Balague.” He’s the expert who told us Alvaro Morata had signed for Arsenal, Santi Cazorla would join Atletico Madrid, Juan Mata was joining Liverpool and Cristiano Ronaldo was returning to Manchester United.

Such are the facts…

Posted: 27th, January 2018 | In: Back pages, News, Sports, Spurs, Tabloids | Comments (3)


Teenagers and binge drinking: last orders at the pub of mum and dad

More miserabilism in the news that parents who give their children booze as part of a bid to promote considerate drinking produce more binge drinkers than parents who don’t. A story in The Lancet (“Association of parental supply of alcohol with adolescent drinking, alcohol-related harms, and alcohol use disorder symptoms: a prospective cohort study”) looks at Australian parents who respond to surveys and their children.

Researchers found that, on average, 62 per cent of teenagers who got booze from “other sources” went on to “binge drink” – against 81 per cent who got booze from their folks and other sources. Just 25 percent of those who got alcohol only from their parents binged. As ever, if you run out of policy ideas, just tell the mob your interventionism is about protecting the kids. You can come up with pretty much any from of prohibition if it is dressed up as protecting der kinder.

The report tells us:

In short, parental supply is not associated with any benefit (ie, reduction in drinking behaviours or harms). These results support the promotion of a precautionary approach to adolescent alcohol supply by parents; to reduce the risk of alcohol-related harm, parents should avoid supplying alcohol to children. Non-supply appears to be the safest option (obvious in some ways), if the parental and societal aim is to protect the health of adolescents and young adults.

One issue with this story must be what is defined as binge drinking. It’s…4 drinks in “one session”. Is that a binge? The NHS says men and women are advised not to drink more than 14 units a week on a regular basis – and that’s one of the lowest recommendations in those part of Europe that bother to cook up advice. That’s “six pints of average-strength beer or 10 small glasses of low-strength wine”, says the NHS. Given that the study included 18-year-olds, might it be that binging is actually drinking responsibly?

 

 

“While governments focus on prevention through school-based education and enforcement of legislation on legal age for buying and drinking alcohol, parents go largely unnoticed,” says professor Richard Mattick, from the University of New South Wales, who led the research. “Parents, policy makers, and clinicians need to be made aware that parental provision of alcohol is associated with risk, not with protection. We advise that parents should avoid supplying alcohol to their teenagers if they wish to reduce their risk of alcohol-related harms.”

No thanks, mate. Risk is part of growing up. I’ll have a pint of mother’s ruin – and a family ticket to Seville.

Posted: 26th, January 2018 | In: News, The Consumer | Comment


Stormy Daniels is ‘Making American Horny Again’

stormy daniels tou

 

If you want to see what Donald Trumps did or didn’t see you can catch aid to masturbation Stormy Daniels at The Trophy Club in Greenville, South Carolina, tomorrow.

The show is part of Daniels’ “Making America Horny Again Tour”, her entrepreneurial reaction to the Wall Street Journal’s claim that Trump paid her $130,000 to keep quiet about an alleged shag. In 2009 In Touch magazine reported Daniel’s story about her alleged sex with Trump.

“He saw her live. You can too,” oozes the ads on The Trophy Club’s Facebook page.

What else Donald’s eyes see in the throes of passion can be only guessed at. But for the fuller experience, I suggest taking along a pack of Cheetos and a child’s mitten.

Posted: 26th, January 2018 | In: Celebrities, News, Politicians | Comment


Action on Sugar and the new Puritans know what’s best for the poor and chilled

You don’t need to share a big back of crisps of chocolates, you know, the small sacks of the stuff you can buy in cinema foyers. A friend of mine eschews the small packets and asks for the “fat bastard” popcorn bucket. He finds it just the right amount. But some people thinks he’s spending his money on too much nosh. They want a return to those halcyon says of less, when rationing was all the go. The Guardian says the country is gripped by an “obesity crisis” – which it isn’t –  and wants us to listen to the uncharitable charity Action on Sugar, which is demanding a 20% sugar tax on all sugar-enriched confectionery.

The poor will pay more for their sugary treats. The better off and thick won’t much notice. (Unless they add a new tax to wine, which is full of sugar.)

AoS also wants a ban on supermarket deals for “sharing” bags of treats like M&Ms, Maltesers, Cadbury Dairy Milk and Giant Buttons. The stuff’s being made too cheap. People are buying too much. There is too much freedom.

Graham MacGregor, professor of cardiovascular medicine at Queen Mary University of London and chairman of Action on Sugar is outraged. “It is shocking that food companies are being allowed to exploit consumers by manipulating them into purchasing larger size bags of chocolate confectionery on the cheap,” he says. “Theresa May is letting companies get away with this despite pledging to help the socially deprived when she first became the prime minister. Companies must be held accountable and reminded to reconsider their ethical and corporate responsibility.”

It turns out you help the deprived by, er, depriving them of things they enjoy. And the easily manipulated should be manipulated not by Bertie Bassett but by anti-sugar campaigners. No money for a skiing holiday this year, but you’ve got a few quid for a big bag of Revels on the sofa in front of the telly. You get your pleasures where you can. But other people know what’s best for you. Step back from the Minstrels trough, fatso. Stop being chilled about your weight and diet. It’s panic stations time. (Call 0800TASTE4STRESS – Our therapists are waiting for your call.)

According to the data, the most sugary sharing bag is a pouch of Brookside Dark Chocolate Pomegranate (198g), which contains 29 teaspoons of sugar in one bag – “four times the maximum daily limit for adults”. Maximum limit? It’s not a limit that if exceeded causes you to overdose. It’s a recommendation.

The Guardian doesn’t mention the reply from the Industry body the Food and Drink Federation. “There is no substantive evidence that they make any meaningful difference to obesity,” it says. “Instead of demonising individual nutrients, products or categories we should instead be promoting balanced diets.”

They all agree on one thing: the purpose of life is health and longevity. So wrap you and yours in cotton wool, avoid all risk and take your five a day. It might not be fun. But at least you’ll be miserable for longer…

NEXT UP: The Pension crisis and people living longer than ever!

Posted: 26th, January 2018 | In: Broadsheets, Key Posts, Money, News, The Consumer | Comment


Transfer balls: Aubameyang’s Arsenal debut is stating the obvious

Transfer balls: are Arsenal going to sign Borussia Dortmund striker Pierre-Emerick Aubameyang. The Germans have turned down two bids this transfer window. But a third bid might just do it because the BBC says Arsenal are “already planning the 28-year-old Gabon striker’s debut”.

Says who? The Beeb links to a story on the Daily Express (aka bullshit.com), which announces: “Aubameyang to Arsenal: Arsene Wenger very confident of deal, debut already being planned.” The Express links to Bild as the source of its story. t the foot of a story on how the German’s want Arsenal’s Olivier Giroud and how the Frenchman would fit in at Borussia, the writer notes: “Arsenal manager Arsène Wenger (68) is scheduled to plan with Aubameyang for the next match at Swansea City (January 30).”

How Bild knows that is not mentioned. And, then, all it claims to know – that at the end of the transfer window, Aubemayang could play for Arsenal. that’s not insider knowledge; that’s stating the obvious. But hook it to the journalisomobile and you get the Mirror delcaing: “Pierre-Emerick Aubameyang ‘set to make Arsenal debut next Tuesday’ as Gunners close in on £60m deal.” And then the killer first line: “Pierre-Emerick Aubameyang could make his Arsenal debut as soon as next Tuesday.” Or to put it another, he might not.

But to the Mirror, guesswork amounts to something being “revealed”:

 

arsenal balls daily mirror

 

And this:

 

More revelations than Elijah

 

Such are the facts…

Posted: 25th, January 2018 | In: Arsenal, Back pages, News, Sports, Tabloids | Comments (2)


Presidents Club Dinner: moral outrage trumps cancer victims

presidents club dinner

 

Lots of reaction to the President Club do, a charity fundraiser in London in which a soak of rich men (is that the correct group term?) convened in Park Lane for a night of extempore giving in the company of able-bodied, attractive female serving staff. The event’s been going for 33 years, but this year’s shindig at the flashy Dorchester Hotel on Park Lane has been damned. A journalist for the Financial Times says while working undercover she experienced lots of wandering hands and the needy blokes who equate being minted with sexual attraction treating young women as chattels.

Many upset voices have taken to the airwaves. #SexistDinner runs the hashtag on social media. Kate Maltby, the woman who survived Damien Green MP touching her knee, says it’s a game-changer. David Meller, who worked at the event, has quit the board of the Department for Education. The Prime Minister is “appalled”. Jess Philips MP says the women were “bought as bait”. Ubiquitous TV face and pal to the super-rich David Walliams says he had no idea he was at a slave auction when he entertained the bastards and is crawling over broken glass to get back in with the right sort of people.

 

 

The money raised is tainted. In the rush to damn, the actions of a few men at a “notorious” dinner  are hurting the most needy.

Great Ormond Street hospital – sending the money back, will not accept future donations
Received: £530,000 between 2009 and 2016.

Comment: “We are shocked to hear of the behaviour reported at the Presidents Club charitable trust fundraising dinner. We would never knowingly accept donations raised in this way. We have had no involvement in the organisation of this event, nor did we attend and we were never due to receive any money from it.”

Evelina children’s hospital (part of Guy’s and St Thomas’ NHS trust) – sending the money back
Received: The Presidents Club pledged £650,000 to fund a six-bed high-dependency space within a new intensive care unit. Construction is under way. At the dinner, Richard Caring pledged £400,000 to put his name on the unit – Evelina confirmed that would not be going ahead.

Comment: “We are very alarmed by the allegations about the behaviour of some of those attending the Presidents Club fundraising dinner. This is not the kind of event we would wish to be associated with and we will therefore be declining funding from it and returning all previous donations from the Presidents Club.”

Clatterbridge cancer charity – sending the money back
Received: £15,000 towards the building of a new specialist cancer hospital in Liverpool.

Comment: “We can confirm that we received a donation of £15,000 from the Presidents Club charitable trust last year.

“Following reports of completely unacceptable behaviour at their event we will be returning that donation.”

Royal Academy of Music – sending the money back and will not accept future donations
Advertisement

Received: £10,000 scholarship for a child violinist with special needs.

Comment: “The allegations of sexual harassment are deeply disturbing. The Royal Academy of Music received a £10,000 donation from the Presidents Club in July 2017, which was awarded as a scholarship to a gifted violin student. We had nothing to do with the event last week, or previous Presidents Club fundraising events.

“In light of today’s allegations, we will be returning the £10,000 donation and will not be accepting any future donations from the Presidents Club. The student will not affected by this course of action. We would never knowingly associate with an organisation which condones the type of behaviour we have learned about today.”

Cancer Research UK – will not accept future donations
Received: £20,000 towards equipment for children.

Comment: “We are shocked by the allegations of inappropriate behaviour. Such behaviour is intolerable and completely incompatible with the values of Cancer Research UK.

“We have never had any involvement with the Presidents Club and no one from Cancer Research UK has ever attended the dinner.

“We did receive a one-off donation from the trust in the past, which has already been spent to fund research into childhood cancers.”

Can it be right that these charities think grandstanding is more important than helping the pained, in need and deprived? Do the women who worked at the event want this? Has anyone thought to ask them – or are they mentally negligible dolts whose views are worth less than their wages and contacts books?  Madison Marriage, the Financial Times reporter who worked at the event, says the 130 hostesses were asked to sign a five-page non-disclosure agreement about the event upon arrival at the hotel. But surely that doesn’t include a ban on reporting criminality?

And on what planet can it be right that moralisers and the offended trump the needs of cancer patients? Answer: this one, apparently. Let’s spot the real victims and not let a few sad men and moralisers hold sway.

Posted: 25th, January 2018 | In: Key Posts, Money, News | Comment


Manchester United balls: Jose Mourinho and the Sun’s selfie preservation society

So how does the Sun headline nine photographs of Manchester United manager Jose Mourinho minding his own business on a walk close to his London home?

Like this:

WHY SO GLUM?

Well, there is a stranger with a camera tracking his private life, possibly calling out his name, as paparazzi are wont to do, in the hope you’ll look at them. But the Sun doesn’t think the man with the big camera is making the Manchester United coach look at the pavement. And that’s odd because in one image, Mourinho is seen posing happily for a selfie with a passer by. Both Mourinho and the celeb spotter are smiling. Or as the Sun has it:

Jose Mourinho looks fed up as he poses for selfie with a workman…

No. He looks happy posing for a photo with a man who took the trouble to ask for a selfie. Might it be the other cameraman belching out his name like a lobotomised parrot that’s making him “moody” and “glum” as he walked down a Knightsbridge road close to his London home?

Posted: 23rd, January 2018 | In: manchester united, News, Sports, Tabloids | Comment


Minimum alcohol pricing is prohibition for the poor and mentally negligible

A strange burst of statistics in the Telegraph, which publishes words from a parliamentary debate on a minimum unit price on alcohol. We learn that “just 4 per cent of the population consume almost one-third of all the alcohol sold in England”.

Is that unfair – should booze be more evenly distributed; and should there be more alcohol so that we can all drink more?

Rosanna O’Connor, director of Alcohol, Drugs and Tobacco at Public Health England (PHE) aims to explain: “Around 4.4 per cent of the population are drinking just under a third of the alcohol consumed in this country. That’s around 2 million drinking just over 30 per cent of the alcohol.”

The greedy sods. More booze for everyone! No, no. This is about health. It’s also about preventing the poor from drinking as much as the wealthy by making booze more expensive. It’s prohibition for the mentally negligible.

The Scottish government thinks that by setting a minimum price for alcohol it will cut the amount consumed. The surcharge goes to the retailer. It’s not a tax. The cash will compensate the vendor for loss of sales. Here’s an example:

A lower limit of 50p per unit of alcohol would put the minimum price of a four-pack of 4% ABV lager at £3.52, while a bottle of 12.5% ABV red wine could not be sold for less than £4.69.

The middle-class drinker won’t notice the hike as much as the less well off drinker, who buys the cheap, high-strength alcohol. The poor and thirty drinkers will either have to drink less or raise more funds for their booze by, say, getting a job as a hedge fund manager, a football agent, engaging in some other nefarious activity or running a booze train to England.

Posted: 23rd, January 2018 | In: News, Politicians, The Consumer | Comment


Manchester United: Sanchez is no mercenary and Arsenal gain hope

The news media is on no doubt which of Arsenal and Manchester United got the better deal when Alexis Sanchez moved to Old Trafford and Henrikh Mkhitaryan headed to London in a swap plus cash deal. Every back page leads with Sanchez:

 

alexis sanchez arsenal manchester united

 

There’s a lot of guff about how Sanchez did and didn’t move for the money – my view: so what if he did; it’s a job and his duty to get the best pay he can to perform it. Not every athlete can be like Tim Duncan, the San Antonio Spurs star who twice helped his club by accepting contracts for less than his market value. Most players listen to their agents. And if journalists and pundits want to look around football for mercenaries, they should lower their gaze toward the men in shiny tracksuits.

The other notable thing is that Sanchez is being marketed heavily from the off, with United posting a video of the Chilean playing a few bars of ‘Glory Glory’, a song I’d always associated with Tottenham Hotspur.

 

 

Over at Arsenal, Arsene Wenger appraised his new player in unusual terms: “He’s a very complete player. He creates chances, he defends well, he can absorb distances and he’s very committed as well.”

The upshot is that both sides lose a player who were under performing and gain one who offers hope.

Posted: 23rd, January 2018 | In: Arsenal, Back pages, Broadsheets, manchester united, News, Sports, Tabloids | Comment


Cathy Newman repeatedly tells Jordan Peterson what he’s saying in horrendous interview

If you cannot understand what your interviewee is saying, you can always couch it in terms you do understand. When Channel 4 journalist Cathy Newman interviewed University of Toronto psychology professor Jordan Peterson, she did just that, opting to bypass Peterson’s actual words and debate points Peterson didn’t say. Her preferred method was to tell Peterson over and over “What you’re saying is…”

The upshot is that anyone tuning in will fancy reading Peterson’s book 12 Rules for Life: An Antidote to Chaos. Camille Paglia calls him “the most important Canadian thinker since Marshall McLuhan”. You might not agree with him, but it helps to listen:

 

 

Peterson debates the interview: “She fabricated on the fly the villain she hoped I’d be”. And on his right to offend, he nails it: “All you have as a journalist is the right to offend people and hurt their feelings.”

 

 

His video the psychological significance of biblical stories  is worth watching.

Posted: 23rd, January 2018 | In: News, TV & Radio | Comments (2)


L’Oreal model Amena Khan resigns over tweets calling for destruction of Israel

Turns out L’Oreal model Amena Khan isn’t worth it.  Khan, who became the first woman in a hijab to model L’Oreal’s face and hair unguents, has resigned “because the current conversations surrounding it detract from the positive and inclusive sentiment that it set out to deliver”. Eh?

 

loreal kahn antisemitism

 

A L’Oreal spokesperson has more: “We have recently been made aware of a series of tweets posted in 2014 by Amena Khan, who was featured in a UK advertising campaign. We appreciate that Amena has since apologised for the content of these tweets and the offence they have caused. L’Oréal Paris is committed to tolerance and respect towards all people. We agree with her decision to step down from the campaign.”

She’s deleted her posts. But someone saved them. Here they are:

 

loreal racism model

 

Nice one, Amena. You might wonder why she wants the world’s only Jewish state to be utterly destroyed. The assumptions could be the some people will look at her and think she’s a bigot.

 

 

Let’s have a look at what Khan told Vogue she got the job:

“How many brands are doing things like this? Not many. They’re literally putting a girl in a headscarf -whose hair you can’t see- in a hair campaign. Because what they’re really valuing through the campaign is the voices that we have. You have to wonder—why is it presumed that women who don’t show their hair don’t look after it? The opposite of that would be that everyone that does show their hair only looks after it for the sake of showing it to others. And that mindset strips us of our autonomy and our sense of independence. Hair is a big part of self-care.”

Not sure if those noble words extend to Israeli women, who if their country is ended, as Amena hoped, would very possibly all be dead. But that’s not to say those uniquely barbaric Jews can’t and shouldn’t look after their hair as they await their next slaughter. Because as anti-Semites never tire of telling us: they’re worth it.

Posted: 22nd, January 2018 | In: Celebrities, Key Posts, News | Comment


Clickbait balls: Is this a hint Manchester United’s Sanchez is new face of Greggs?

 

Trinity Mirror is looking to take control of the Express. The company, which publishes the Daily Mirror, will then surely set about creating the largest clickbait farm in British football news. Both newspapers sites are stuffed full of utter tosh designed with one purpose: to trick fans looking for news on their club into clicking links and seeing the ads.

In today’s Express, readers are presented with the headline: “Is this the clue Arsenal will sign Pierre-Emerick Aubameyang?” A clue? Well, Arsenal’s deal makers are in Germany and Borrussia Dortmund, Aubemeyang’s club, say the Gunners have tabled an offer for their star player. But those are not the clue to which the Express refers. The clue is that “Ladbrokes believe striker Aubemayang is set to arrive too with the odds on him joining now 1/8.” Yep. What a bookie “believes” is a clue to a multi-million pound deal.

 

.”Manchester United was one of the teams that he dreamt about” says  Barbara Astorga 

After what looks like a sponsored story dressed up as clickbait, which itself is balls dressed up as news, the Mirror shows the Express how they do it.

When the Manchester Evening News reported on a drive-thru Greggs coming to the area – “The first AND ONLY drive-thru Greggs is in Greater Manchester and it’s open now” – other Trinity Mirror ignored the sore’s uniqueness and noted:

The Leicester Mercury: “A Greggs drive-thru has opened in Manchester – so we asked whether one is coming to Leicester.”

“When we heard the news that Manchester were getting their very own drive-thru, we wanted to know if we were getting one in Leicester – soon. so we got in touch with Gregg’s to find out – but it’s not good news. Greggs got back in touch to say there are no further Drive Thru shops planned to open in the immediate future.”

The Liverpool Echo the story was headlined: “Is Liverpool getting a Greggs drive-thru?”

“But unfortunately for all our Scouse Greggs fans, there are no current plans to open a drive thru in Liverpool.”

The Grimsby Telegraph: “Drive-thru Greggs may find its way to Grimsby as new concept is trialled for nationwide rollout.”

“The concept is being tried out at Irlam Gateway Service Station, in Salford, before a potential nationwide roll-out, though bosses say there are no immediate plans to open any more.”

Lincolnshire Live: “Could drive-thru Greggs be coming to Lincoln? Bakery’s new concept set for nationwide roll-out”

“The concept is being tried out in Manchester before a potential nationwide roll-out, but bosses say there are no immediate plans to open any more.”

The Bristol Post: “Is Bristol getting a Greggs drive-thru?”

“Although the company hasn’t said yet whether it plans to open a drive-thru branch in Bristol, its chief executive Roger Whiteside said it wanted the chain to have drive-thru shops in all sorts of convenient locations – so we wouldn’t rule out one appearing here just yet.”

Somerset Live: “Will Somerset get a Greggs drive-thru if the first one is a hit?”

“The concept, follows the launch of Greggs delivery service in Manchester, is being tried out here before a potential nationwide roll-out, but bosses say there are no immediate plans to open any more.”

If the Express and Mirror merge, look out for such scoops as: “Is Manchester United’s Alexis Sanchez the new face of Greggs?”; “Is this a hint Manchester United’s Sanchez is new face of Greggs?”; “Is this the real reason Sanchez left Arsenal for Manchester United?”

Spotter: Press Gazette

 

Posted: 22nd, January 2018 | In: Back pages, manchester united, News, Sports, Tabloids | Comment


Durham’s mini police bring their own sarcasm

The spirit of Pavel Morozov is evoked in Durham, where the local constabulary have created a ‘Mini Police’ force. A platoon of uniformed nine to 11 year olds is on patrol.

Durham police outline the mission: “The objective is to introduce these children to a positive experience of policing and to get them involved in the local community.”

And you will all be inducted:

A digital platform also encourages schools to embrace the Mini Police concept in their environment covering topics such as lesson plans, finding neighbourhood policing teams and sharing good practise.

If your kinder believe in the State’s every law and want to see them all upheld, sign up here. Failure to do so is not a hate crime – yet.

 

durham mini police

One of life’s great “experiencences

 

 

The Mini Police project within Durham Constabulary is a fun and interactive volunteering opportunity for 9 to 11-year-old children. The Mini Police support the force priorities, through participation in community engagement events. Those involved can look forward to developing a confident voice through enjoyable experiencences [sic].

Children who become part of the programme help to tackle local issues, as highlighted by their own communities. By assisting the police service, they also carry that ownership and pride back into the community they live in.

 

What do these new community owners do?

mini police

Police really are getting younger.

 

Posted: 22nd, January 2018 | In: News, Strange But True | Comment


Middlesbrough fans arrested for urinating in QPR’s goalie’s water bottle

The Metropolitan Police have arrested a Middlesbrough fan who, allegedly, urinated in QPR goalkeeper Alex Smithies’ water bottle. Footage appears to show the fan taking a leak into the bottle before lobbing it back onto the pitch.

 

boro-fan-bottle-qpr

Leaky defence

 

The Met say:

After an investigation, the MPS Football Unit can confirm that the male arrested at the QPR-Boro game yesterday has been charged with throwing an item on to the pitch.

The male has been bailed and will appear at court next month.

Cleveland Police say they will “remove him from attending Boro games again”.

 

Posted: 22nd, January 2018 | In: News, Sports | Comment


Manchester United: Mata is the antidote to Sanchez and Pogba’s greed

How much does Manchester United’s Paul Pogba earn? This is not to shame ‘Old Pogba’, as the BBC dubs him, to cast him as a footballing mercenary, a barb former Arsenal defender Martin Keown has aimed at Alexis Sanchez as the Chilean prepares to leave Arsenal for a £450,000-week deal at Manchester United.

The vast majority of us work for the money. Footballers should be no different. Although some of us want footballers to be role models for the slack-jawed masses, which is why the Guardian has made Juan Mata its footballer of the year. The Manchester United midfielder heads the Common Goal project, in which players and managers donate 1% of their salary to charity. Good for him and the recipients of his generosity, but relegating an athlete’s ability with the ball to somewhere below their morals is unhelpful to anyone who sees football as a fun leisure pursuit. Does journalism award prizes to commentators and editors on the strength of how many charities they give to? Do newspapers publish staff earnings in league tables and link wage packets to their owner’s net worth? The maximum fee for professional footballers was scrapped in the 1960s. The current obsession with footballer’s earnings and spending power looks a lot like snobbish disdain.

 

Young man from working-class background buys house!

 

And in the rush to sneer at footballers, facts are manipulated to suit the narrative. When Pogba signed for United on 2016, the Daily Mail stated his wage at £290,000-per week. Today the Mirror reports that Pogba earns £200,000-a-week. That’s quite some difference. And the Express says Pogba wants his wage”doubled” to match the “£500,000-a-week” Sanchez is set to earn.

Pogba’s basic salary is £165,000 a week, says the BBC. But his 41-page contract contains substantial incentives to earn more.

Will United give Pogba such a massive raise because his agent senses an opportunity? You wouldn’t bet against it. If the club are desperate enough to pay Sanchez a massive wage and in so doing risk destabilising the team – the reason Pep Guardiola gave for Manchester City pulling out of any deal for Sanchez – they’ll pay through the nose to keep their main marketing asset happy. Good for them. The rest of us should all agree on one thing: everyone should be on huge wages.

Posted: 22nd, January 2018 | In: Back pages, Key Posts, manchester united, Money, News, Sports, Tabloids | Comment


Transfer balls: Manchester City race to sign ‘the new Paul Pogba’

Manchester United midfielder and marketing maestro Paul Pogba is 24. In media terms that’s old. The BBC for one is tired of old Pogba and has found “the new Paul Pogba”, aka Boubakary Soumare, 18.

The Daily Mail agrees, reporting that Manchester City, Everton and Leicester are looking at the  “new Paul Pogba”. The Lille teenager is on the market for a mere £20m-rated. That’s a snip for a player who’s made a whopping three starts for the struggling French club.

 

Boubakary Soumare

 

The Old Paul Pogba cost Man United around £90m when he joined when from Juventus. So news that the new version is available for much less should appeal to many clubs and brands.

What we don’t learn in the Mail’s story is who first called Soumare “the new Paul Pogba”. The Sun also fails to name a source for the claim in its story “Manchester City step up chase for Lille’s ‘new Paul Pogba’ Boubakary Soumare”.

There’s no word from Soumare. But rumours suggest he fashions himself as “the new Norman Hunter”.

Posted: 22nd, January 2018 | In: Back pages, Manchester City, News, Sports, Tabloids | Comment


Manchester United pay through the nose for Arsenal’s bargain Sanchez

When Emmanuel Petit isn’t spending time with his hair, the former France and Arsenal player is creating to-deadline ‘news’ for Paddy Power, the bookmakers. On the firm’s website ‘writes’ that Arsenal “could have sold him [Alexis Sanchez]  last summer and received at least double the amount they’ll get now.” Er, no. The £60m Manchester City offered the Chilean last summer also included a signing on payment and a cut for the player’s agent, a man widely reported to be getting £10m from the £35m Manchester United have offered Arsenal. Arsenal were not getting £60m.

But, say it was £40m to Arsenal (the £60m less £10m to the agent and £10m to the player), the £20m Arsenal will get for Sanchez is boosted by Henrikh Mkhitaryan going the other way. He cost United £30m in 2016. Arsenal will get a player worth around that price – it’s what he would have cost them – plus £20m. That’s not too shabby. Factor in not paying Sanchez the £300,000 a week Arsenal offered him in a new contract – he’s on £130,000 a week; about the same sum Mkhitaryan earns at United – and that Sanchez is free agent in the summer, and Arsenal’s bankers aren’t jumping from top-floor windows just yet.

Petit goes on:

As for Mkhitaryan, since he signed for United he hasn’t been involved enough. I’m not sure he has a winning mentality, and sometimes he reminds me of Ozil: you really have to push him to show his character and put him under pressure to display his best qualities. There’s no doubt he has great skill, but I’m not sure he’s the kind of player that Arsenal need – they should be focused on other positions.

Put that through the tabloid mincer and it comes:

 

 

When the Armenian signed for United, he was greeted by his new manager Jose Mourinho thus:

“We have brought in the player who was voted the best player in the French league [Zlatan Ibrahimovic] and with Micki we have brought the player who was voted the best player of the Bundesliga. He was voted not by the fans, not by the journalists but voted by the fellow players and that is what means more, I believe, because when your fellow players are the ones that choose you then it means a lot.

“Micki is a fantastic player and what I like more is something that is undeniable, which is the number of goals that he scores by not being a striker. His number of goals per season is really high for somebody that is not a striker. The number of assists is also very clear because it shows clearly his creativity, his vision and his concept of collective play, and that is something that I believe is really important for a club like us.

“We try to be dominant and will, for sure, face teams with a very defensive profile which is his capacity of acceleration of the game. He has a change of speed with the ball and without the ball, and that is very, very important for a club like ours.”

“Mikhi Mouse”? Petit’s words are being manipulated, of course. But there’s no need because what else he says is entirely stupid and needs no sensationalising:

Arsenal are struggling to bring in top-quality players, and also to keep the ones they have. It has been like this for a long time. They must be more competitive on the market, both when buying and selling. Times have changed since I left Arsenal, but I’m pretty sure Arsène is still heavily involved when it comes from to the transfer market.

Can you keep a player earning £130,000 a week from being attracted to earning £500,000 a week at a different club?

…but with the money Arsenal have, they should be aiming higher. Because they are not competitive on the pitch at the moment, they need to be more competitive with wages: if you can’t guarantee trophies or at least compete to win them, then you must offer players more in order to come to the club. That’s just the way it works.

It helps if you have as much money as your rivals. Gary Jacob explains the “way it works”:

United earn and can spend much more money on wages, while City have a mega wealthy owner….Arsenal have championed a sustainable model built on being able to generate more income from tickets and corporate activities, but trail United in commercial income.

The model means Arsenal’s top earners are not way ahead of their lowest earners.

The bulk of Arsenal’s players earn between around £60,000 a week and £70,000 a week. Arsenal handed Alex Iwobi a contract worth around £35,000 a week when he put in some positive performances as they were keen to tie him down. At other clubs, inferior players earn relatively less by comparison….

In short: Arsenal take more of a punt than the two Manchester clubs or Chelsea on younger, less experienced players.  As Arsene Wenger has said:

“We have to revisit the way we structure our club, and our scouting policy. You look at world-class players now, you look at [Cristiano] Ronaldo, Neymar, Sanchez, their level of financial demands and the level of their costs, you have to go younger and certainly these players are not affordable.

“[Finding future stars] is more difficult nowadays because the competition is everywhere, it is very big. What is important today is that we are the club that can maybe give them a chance, more than many other clubs.”

Arsenal cannot compete with mega-rich owners who see the clubs as a branding exercise. But they can find stars of tomorrow. Indeed, when Sanchez joined the Gunners from Barcelona, didn’t they recruit a bargain, arguably paying under the odds for a top talent?

Posted: 19th, January 2018 | In: Arsenal, Back pages, manchester united, News, Sports | Comment


Kazakh oligarch’s $179,000 wedding cake doubles as a starter home

To a wedding in Kazakhstan, where guests are touring the $179,000 wedding cake that doubles as a starter home for newly weds Amirzhan, grandson of Shymkent oligarch Serikzhan Seitzhanov, and Aruzhan, daughter of Kairat Satybaldy, a Kazakh businessman, nephew of the country’s president. Built by Renat Agzamov, a former Russian boxing champion, the cake is well appointed, with master bedroom, basement polo studio, games room and living quarters for umpteen servants.

 

Реализовали сложнейший международный проект🔥 диаметр торта 3 метра, высота 4,2 ( с тележкой) . Вес около 1500кг. С такими размерами доставить заготовки в другую страну – это ОЧЕНЬ сложно ! Но мы справились, потому что у нас самая сильная команда профессионалов в мире!🔥🔥🔥 Перед вывозом торта в зал – ровно 3 суток без сна, но результат того стоит! Благодарю свою команду за мощный рывок в космос 🚀 Просто ценю и уважаю каждого😘❤️. Благодарю принимающую сторону за очень тёплый и душевный прием🙏! Как приятно работать, когда тебя любят, ценят и уважают😘❤️. Ну и самое главное – счастья молодым и благополучия 🙏🙏❤️.

A post shared by RENAT AGZAMOV (@renat_agzamov) on

 

The icing on the cake is that, according to the World Bank, the GDP per capita for Kazakhstan is US$7,715.

 

Posted: 19th, January 2018 | In: News, Strange But True, The Consumer | Comment


Manchester United’s fee for Arsenal’s Alexis Sanchez confuses the Daily Mirror

Manchester United are going to pay an “incredible” £182m for Alexis Sanchez. So says the Daily Mirror. And it’s wrong, of course. A desperate and rich United have agreed to pay a £35m transfer fee for the 29-year-old Chilean. That’s pretty much it.

But the Mirror tots up the £500,000-a-week ages Sanchez will earn before tax on a four-and-a-half year contract and adds £117m to that £35m. It then adds a further £20m Sanchez will get by way of a “signing on payment”. That’s £172m. But the Mirror conjures £182 by double counting £10m Sanchez’s agent will earn, which is already incorporated in the £35m transfer fee.

 

daily mirror sanchez

£10m becomes £20m at the stroke of a pen

 

But aside from the pisspoor accounting, readers have to imagine that United will pay Sanchez over four years wages in one tranche. They won’t, of course.

And there’s the wages. The Sun says Sanchez will earn £505,000 a week. The Mail says it’s £450,000, a week – £350,000 basic plus £100,000 in image rights. That’s a licence for United to exploit Sanchez’s name commercially on stuff like mugs and other merchandising spin-offs. Buying Sanchez is not just about buying his ability on the pitch. United will earn from Sanchez’ name. It’s not wages. It’s a partnership.

Sanchez stands to earn a fortune. But the Mirror thinks his vast income is simply not sensational enough and needs inflating.

But you can get to £180m if you include wages, fees and tax:

 

 

Posted: 18th, January 2018 | In: Arsenal, manchester united, Money, News, Sports, Tabloids | Comment (1)


Stormy Daniels: what’s it’s like to have sex with Donald Trump

Ever wonder what sex with Donald Trump is like? There might be bedwetting and orange skids on the sheets. But what about the actual intercourse? Lending Trump watchers and other enthusiastic sex watchers a small moistened helping hand is Stormy Daniels, a pneumatic aid to masturbation who tells us via a 2011 edition of In Touch magazine that sex with Trump in 2006 was “textbook”.

 

donald trump Stormy_Daniels_2010

Stormy in a G-Cup

 

In most of my school textbooks, sex was depictions of gigantic breasts and squirting knobs drawn in the margins. In Stormy’s edition of York Notes, we get more words than images:. “I actually don’t even know why I did it,” says the porn star of the billionaire, “but I do remember while we were having sex I was like, ‘Please don’t try to pay me’.” Well, d’uh. For one thing, where’s she’s gonna swipe the credit card?

She says he asked her to sign a DVD of one of her skin flicks and called her a “smart businesswoman” before they parted.

Anyhow, this is news because Trump says they never shagged. And she agrees, also stating that in no way was she paid $130,000 to never mention the incident.

Which she has and hasn’t.

Posted: 18th, January 2018 | In: Celebrities, News, Politicians | Comment


Arsenal: Wenger laments Walcott sale

Everton have signed Theo Walcott from Arsenal. Walcott has joined on a £20m on a three-and-a-half year contract. This is good news for all parties. Walcott has stagnated at Arsenal. Everton could be the flip he requires to restart a career that promise much and delivered less. In his 12 seasons at Arsenal, Walcott has scored 108 goals in 397 appearances. Not too shabby at all. But the feeling persists that the stats should have been more impressive.

“It felt like it was time for me to move on [from Arsenal],” says Walcott. “It was sad but it’s exciting at the same time and I want to reignite my career and push Everton to win things as they have done before. The manager is very hungry and it’s just what I need. I’ve had a couple of chats with him and straightaway I felt that hunger and that desire that he wanted from me.”

In a statement, Arsenal said: “We all thank Theo for his contribution to the club and wish him well for the future.”

Arsenal manager Arsene Wenger says he did not want Walcott to leave. But if you don’t give a player with ambition a starting berth in a team of journeymen, he has to go.

 

Posted: 17th, January 2018 | In: Arsenal, News, Sports | Comment (1)