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Manchester City Balls: Chelsea Fans Display Banner Praising Frank Lampard’s Goalscoring

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OF course Frank Lampard, Chelsea’s record goalscorer (203), struck for Manchester City to deny Chelsea three points at the Etihad.

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Posted: 21st, September 2014 | In: Chelsea, Manchester City, Sports | Comment


Savage Balls: Manchester City Should Breaks The Rules, Chelsea Buy Success And Liverpool Didn’t Win

TALKING Balls: The BBC’s football expert Robbie Savage is talking about Manchester City in the Daily Mirror.

Robbie Savage column: Arsenal, Liverpool and Man City can forget Champions League Final win already

One game into the Champions’ League and Savage delivers a rousing speech that only Chelsea should bother turning up for the tournament’s remaining games.

Best league in the world or not, the opening statements from England’s clubs in the Champions League this week were an embarrassment.

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Posted: 19th, September 2014 | In: Arsenal, Chelsea, Liverpool, Manchester City, Sports | Comment


Chelsea Balls: Is Badge-Kissing Cesc Fabregas The Most Fickle Man In Football?

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GOOD old Cesc Fabregas. He’s the Spanish footballer with Barcelona “DNA”, Arsenal in his heart and Barcelona in his blood. He’s Cesc Fabregas, the the self-declared Arsenal fan (“I will always be an Arsenal fan”), who agitated for a move to Barcelona – who said “my whole family are Barcelona supporters”; who said in 2011, “If some day I leave Arsenal it will never be to sign for another English team. I’m very sure”.

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Posted: 18th, September 2014 | In: Arsenal, Chelsea, Sports | Comment


Chelsea Balls: Welcome To the Stamford Bridge Job Centre Cristian Manea

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THE Sun says Chelsea are looking to sign 17-year-old Romanian Cristian Manea for £2.3million. He’s a good player who will surely go on to have a professional career at some level.

Of course, the transfer season doesn’t open until Janaury, so Chelsea will have to wait a while before recruiting yet another player to farm out on loan.

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Posted: 16th, September 2014 | In: Chelsea, Sports | Comment


Liverpool ‘Trolls’ And The Trouble With Fabregas And Torres At Chelsea

THE Daily Mirror’s Brian Reade – the man who ‘assassinated’ an area and its white population in the “White Man’s Gulch” of Eltham – is upset at treatment meted out to Chesela’s Cesc Fabregas And Liverpool’s Fabio Borini:

Why are Fabio Borini and Cesc Fabregas now having to defend themselves against online character assassinations?

That question is soon followed by another?

Borini, who spurned two moves away from Anfield this summer has taken abuse from Sunderland, QPR and Liverpool trolls for being a greedy little git. Since when has having the determination to fight for your place at the club you signed for been a crime?

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Posted: 12th, September 2014 | In: Chelsea, Liverpool, Sports | Comment (1)


Transfer Balls: Arsenal Sign Adrien Rabiot Then Sell Him To Roma To Smash Manchester United’s Kevin Strootman Bid

TRANSFER Balls: A look at the utter rot passed off as fact in the mainstream media. Today, the Daily Express has news for Arsenal fans: Paris St-Germain are looking to offload midfielder Adrien Rabiot to Roma. PSG are after Roma’s Kevin Strootman, 24, who is also a target for Manchester United.

Regular readers of Tabloid Balls readers will recall that The Metro said Rabiot was already an Arsenal player.

 

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Posted: 8th, September 2014 | In: Arsenal, Chelsea, manchester united, Sports | Comment


Transfer Balls Awards: Arsenal Sign Cavani And Khedira, Manchester United Get Vidal, Kroos And Hummels – Falcao To Liverpool

TRANSFER Balls: Over the summer Anorak has been highliting the utter balls newspapers and football websites have presnted as fact. Time to review some of the choices cuts. As ever the biggest balls features Liverpool, Arsenal, Manchester United and Cheslea.

 

The Daily Mail told Manchester United fans that Miranda was on his way to the club from Atlético Madrid. He was looking at local schools for his children. He never left home.

 

 

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The straw-clutching CaughtOffisde wesbite told its readers that Arsenal had signed Sami Khedira. The player remains at Real Madrid.

 

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And:

 

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Posted: 2nd, September 2014 | In: Arsenal, Chelsea, Key Posts, Liverpool, Manchester City, manchester united, Sports | Comment


Transfer Balls: Radamel Falcao Joined Chelsea Twice, Signed For Manchester City And Manchester United And Headed To Arsenal And Liverpool

TRANSFER Balls: A look at reporting on Radamel Falcao, the Monaco player linked to Arsenal, Manchester United, Manchester City, Liverpool and Cheslea. It’s been a pretty rich summer of utter balls being passed off as a fact.

The Metro says Falcao has agreed to join Manchester United for £51m.

 

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Is that to be believed? In 2013, the Mirror said Falcao had joined Manchester City for £54m.

 

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The Mirror added:

…the deal is also a major coup for Pellegrini, with 27-year-old Falcao keen to work for the Chilean, who is expected to sign a two-year deal at City within a fortnight.

 

On August 29 2014, The Week asked if Falcao had joined Real Madrid.

 

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On August 29, the Metro said Arsenal had a clear run to buy Falcao:

 

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The ever dire Goal.com said that Falcao had signed for Chelsea.

 

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The equally rubbish CaughtOffide stated that, yes, Falcao had joined Chelsea.

 

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Of, course the same site said Cheslea had bought Falcao for much less money the year before.

 

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But then the Mirror said Falcao had “already agreed” to kon Real Madrid. That was January 2013.

 

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On Augut 7 2014, Falcao was heading to Liverpool.

 

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On August 17, Falcao was heading to Juventus, said the Daily Mail.

 

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It’s a Transfer Balls Royal Flush as Falcao is linekd with all give of English football’s biggest clubs.

Such are the facts…

 

 

Posted: 1st, September 2014 | In: Arsenal, Chelsea, Liverpool, Manchester City, manchester united, Sports | Comment


Transfer Balls Dead Cert: Radamel Falcao Heads To Manchester City, Chelsea Or Liverpool

TRANSFER Balls – betting special. Every day the betting industy pumps out PR missives that desperate journalists can turn into a story. Let’s take a look and see what the trusty bookmakers have been feeding the press about Monaco’s Radamel Falcao, linked, as he has been, with moves to Arsenal, Liverpool, Chelsea and Manchester City.

As ever, there is no talk on the size of the market. It might be that a few people have actually been mad enough (or got insider knowledge – ed) to gamble on the transfer season being as it is full of “lies” (source: Arsene Wenger).

 

The Daily Star tild us to put our money on Falcao to Liverpool:

 

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Posted: 31st, August 2014 | In: Chelsea, Liverpool, Manchester City, Sports | Comment


Transfer Balls: Loic Remy Has Left QPR to Join Liverpool, Chelsea and Arsenal. Now Read On…

TRANSFER Balls: Loic Remy has left QPR to join Liverpool, Chelsea and Arsenal. Now read on…

The Daily Express has news:

According to West London Sport, 27-year-old Remy rejected a new contract at QPR on Friday and will undergo a medical at Chelsea tomorrow. But those plans could change as Arsenal put their hat in the ring, with Wenger likely to descend into a bidding war with Mourinho for Remy’s services.

No need for any war. The Mail says Loic Remy has joined Chelsea for £8m. The paper announced:

Loic Remy has completed a move to Chelsea from QPR

 

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Posted: 31st, August 2014 | In: Arsenal, Chelsea, Sports | Comment


Transfer Balls: Chelsea Pay £16m For Torres To Join Milan As Costa Lies Injured

TRANSFER Balls: What news of Cheslea’s Fernando Torres?

The Sun says Torres is “close to agreeing a £10m move to AC Milan”.

This, says the paper, will give Chelsea a return of £4m because – get this – Torres will earn a £6m ‘loyalty payment’ from the deal because he still has 18 months left on his five-year £150,000-a- week contract.

The Mail says it’d worse than that.

The Spanish striker therefore wants Chelsea to pay up the two years remaining on his deal – totalling around £16m – if he is to leave the club.

Will Chelsea miss the Spaniard? Last season Torres featured in 28 Premier League matches and scored five goals. So. No. They won’t.

But he might return to Stamford Bridge. The Telegraph says he’ll go to AC Milan on loan. Torres earns £9m a year at Cheslea. Milan have offered his  £7m a year. Will Torres be able to muddle by on less money?

But the Indy says Torres wants a permanent deal or no deal at all.

In other Chelsea news, Diego Costa has injured his hamstring in training. He will be out for 6 weeks (Mail).

Over to you, Torres…

 

Posted: 28th, August 2014 | In: Chelsea, Sports | Comment


Transfer Balls: Fernando Torres Leaves Chelsea And Says He’s ‘Made For’ Liverpool

TRANSFER Balls: IS Cheslea’s Fernando Torres leaving Chelsea. The Times says Torres is heading to Roma on loan. The del also involves Roma receving £20m for striker Mattia Destro, 23.

Torres has two years left on his Chelsea contract. It pays him a meagre £180,000 a week.

Walter Sabatini, a Roma director, flew to London yesterday for the second time in a week, accompanied by Mauro Baldissoni, the club’s general manager, to try to thrash out a deal. Sabatini tried to tempt Chelsea and Manchester United into buying Mehdi Benatia on his first visit at the weekend and is also looking for a replacement in England for the Morocco defender.

The Mail has reported this month that Torres is wanted by Valencia, Atletioc Madrid and Inter Milan.

Dod they all really want Torrest, the man who gave the Indy this headline on August 13:

Fernando Torres fails to score in 266 pre-season minutes after another miserable night for Chelsea

He had his chances to score agasint the mighty Slovenia’s NK Olimpija Ljubljana:

 

Why is player who was so good now so bad? The Mirror quotes Jose Mourinho:

“Fernando is a good player and will not be sold. Maybe the self-esteem in terms of goalscorer is not at the top. All eyes are on him and when he misses a goal, everybody remembers. But his work for the team is fantastic and because of that we can play with two of the forwards at the same time, no problem…”

£50m for a good player. What does a great player cost? And if Cheslea give him the boot, what then for Torres’ faltering self-esteem?

Well, he’s not going to Roma. The Telegraph reports:

“It’s true that Chelsea are interested in Mattia,” Destro’s agent said on Thursday. “But the reports regarding a swap deal have no foundation, it’s all speculation.
“Roma don’t want to sell Mattia and Mattia prefers to remain at Roma.”

Still, at least the Chelsea fans love him…not:

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Maybe Torrest should go back to Lvierpool. As he said:

“One day, Steven Gerrard came to say to me, ‘Fernando, now, you have to think of yourself. Do what you have to do’,” Torres told French magazine So Foot. But when I went to tell him that I was going to accept the Chelsea offer, it destroyed him. Announcing my departure from Liverpool to Gerrard was one of the most difficult moments of my career. He was my best team-mate and I am not sure of finding another like him in the future. We were made for each other.”

Stranger things have happened…

Posted: 21st, August 2014 | In: Chelsea, Liverpool, Sports | Comments (2)


Transfer Balls: Mehdi Benatia Wants Bayern Munich, Talks To Manchester United And Hopes To Play For Chelsea

TRANSFER Balls: Roma defender Mehdi Benatia has been the subject of feverish speculation. The British press have linked him with move to Manchester Untied, Cheslea and Manchester City. So far we have learned that United have bid £24 million in a bid to, er, gazump Chelsea’s £30m bid or a player who prefers to play for Manchster City.

Yesterday the Star told its readers that Benatia is going nowhere:

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Posted: 20th, August 2014 | In: Chelsea, manchester united, Sports | Comment


Transfer Balls: Sami Khedira Wants Arsenal, Teases Chelsea And Moves To Bayern Munich

TRANSFER Balls: The reporting on Real Madrid’s Sami Khedira. Is he heading to Arsenal? Chelsea? Anywhere? All these facts are from today’s media:

The Metro says the German World Cup winner is available for £8m.

 

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Posted: 17th, August 2014 | In: Arsenal, Chelsea, Sports | Comment


Transfer Balls: Mehdi Benatia Agrees Manchester City Deal But Joins Manchester United For £6m Less Than Chelsea Bid

TRANSFER Balls: A look at reporting on Roma’s Mehdi Benatia and his move to Cheslea, Manchester United, Manchester City and, well, anyone…

 

Today, Sky Sports Jim White tweets:

 

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Posted: 16th, August 2014 | In: Chelsea, manchester united, Sports | Comments (3)


Transfer Balls Full House: Marco Reus Joins Arsenal, Manchester United, Chelsea, Liverpool And Man City

TRANSFER Balls: A regular look at rumour and speculation being passed off as fact in the media. So, is Borussia Dortmund’s Marco Reus heading to the Premier League? As ever, the media contest is to link every top player with every top English club.

 Daily Mirror, December 26, 2013:

Manchester United target Marco Reus will cost £40m… Midfielder Reus had a £29.4m buy-out clause in his contract at Borussia Dortmund. But it is understood the situation has changed since Bayern Munich activated a similar clause to snatch Mario Gotze last summer.

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Posted: 26th, July 2014 | In: Arsenal, Chelsea, Liverpool, Manchester City, manchester united, Sports | Comment


Transfer Balls: Sami Khedira Signed For Arsenal On Deadline Day

TRANSFER Balls: A regular look at rumour and utter balls being passed off as breaking football news in the media. Today we look at news on Real Madrid’s Sami Khedira.

The Metro, July 24:

Sami Khedira is still hopeful of sealing a move to Arsenal this summer despite suggestions that the Gunners have given up trying to sign him.

The Metro does not say how it knows Khedira is hopeful, only that he is. The paper’s ability to read minds is famed.

But over in the Express, the German’s hopes of playing for the Gunners turn to disappointment:

Arsene Wenger is ready to abandon his pursuit of Sami Khedira, Morgan Schneiderlin and Lars Bender. The Arsenal boss is considering deploying Jack Wilshere in a midfield holding role next season.

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Posted: 25th, July 2014 | In: Arsenal, Chelsea, Sports | Comment


Transfer Balls: Chelsea Want Miranda But Mourinho Doesn’t

TRANSFER Balls: Who is heading to Chelsea?

Today the Daily Star has an “EXCLUSIVE”.

 

 

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CHELSEA are in talks over a £20m bid for Atletico Madrid defender Joao Miranda…

…sources close to the player insist he would be interested in joining Chelsea.

Number of sources named: nil.

Number of links in story to sources: nil.

In other news, Sky Sports reports, also today:

 

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Jose Mourinho insists Chelsea have completed their transfer business for the summer…”I have to say my club did a fantastic job, and not just because of what we bought, but because we did it in almost record time. The transfer market closes 31 August and we close our market on July 19. We finished the market today.”

The Golden Turd has yet to be awarded for the most fanciful transfer story, but the Star is straining to win it…

Previously: Manchester United bought Toni Kroos in the Daily Star.

 

Posted: 19th, July 2014 | In: Chelsea, Sports | Comment


Transfer Balls: Sami Khedira Agrees Arsenal Move Without His Agent Knowing

TRANSFER Balls: What news in the mainstream media of Real Madrid’s German midfielder Sami Khedira? Let’s look at the Daily Express’ reporting on the player’s move to Arsenal.

Daily Express, June 16 – and Khedira is a Gunner:

 

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Posted: 17th, July 2014 | In: Arsenal, Chelsea, Reviews, Sports | Comment


Transfer Balls: Sami Khedira Wants Arsenal And £6m More To Play for Manchester United

TRANSFER Balls: Is Real Madrid and Germany midfielder Sami Khedira heading from Real Madrid to Arsenal?

The Daily Star manages to link the player with four of the biggest English clubs:

Liverpool and Man United join Arsenal and Chelsea in four-way £24m fight for Sami Khedira

Jack Wilson is in full Balls mode:

Both Arsenal and Chelsea have been linked with moves for the 27-year-old Real Madrid midfielder.

Linked by whom? Jack doesn’t say. Instead he just speculates to deadline:

But their attempts to sign him could be hit by their Premier League rivals… Manchester United were after Khedira last summer and ready to try and snap him up again. Liverpool could also reportedly move for the German.

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Posted: 12th, July 2014 | In: Arsenal, Chelsea, Liverpool, manchester united, Sports | Comment


Transfer Balls: Paul Pogba Hates Arsenal, Loves Chelsea And Thinks Mourinho Should Be Sacked

TRANSFER Balls salutes the work of the Daily Star which conjures utter balls and turns it into news. This week, the Star announces:

Ex-Manchester United star Paul Pogba wants to join Chelsea

That’s the Manchester United “star” who made seven appearances for United, all as a substitute. So. Having stretched the language, we wonder about the root of the Star’s scoop. Reading on we learn:

JUVENTUS and France midfielder Paul Pogba has revealed that he wants to join Chelsea.

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Posted: 23rd, June 2014 | In: Chelsea, Sports | Comment


Transfer Balls: Manchester United’s Manchester United To Join Chelsea

Toni Kroos Manchester United

 

TRANSFER Balls hails the work of James Dickenson, who writes in the Express:

Toni Kroos puts Man Utd and Chelsea on ALERT with future still undecided

That’s the same Toni Kross the Express said has already joined United and presented as fact by the Manchester Evening News (“Kroos deal done”) and the Daily Mirror (“United have agreed deal in principle with Bayern for midfielder Toni Kroos”).

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Posted: 19th, June 2014 | In: Chelsea, manchester united, Sports | Comment


Chelsea Balls: ‘Arsenal Fan’ Cesc Fabregas Discovers That Everyone Hates Him

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SO. CESC Fabregas the man with Barcelona “DNA” and Arsenal in his heart has joined Chelsea. Good for him. But no-one really likes him. He is just about the most disloyal player on the market.

Reaction to the move been noisy. It seems that Fabregas can’t do right by anyone (except his bank manager).

The Times says he’s upset Chelsea fans:

Cesc Fàbregas risks Chelsea anger after revealing Arsenal regrets

Cesc Fàbregas risked angering fans of his new club after completing a move to Chelsea for £29.5 million last night when he appeared to regret being denied the chance of a return to Arsenal.

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Posted: 15th, June 2014 | In: Arsenal, Chelsea, Sports | Comments (4)


Chelsea Balls: Arsenal Fan Fabregas Follows The Money And Signs For Chelsea

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FINALLY! Chelsea have signed Cesc Fabregas from Barcelona. He’s the chap who left Arsenal by telling them: “I will always be an Arsenal fan.” He’s the chap who wanted to follow his heart to Barcelona. Fabregas most likely has one of those two-club hats. That’s how loyal he is.

When he left to Barcelona, Xavi uttered: “He is a football player with Barça DNA.”

Carles Puyol belched: “He is the future of Barcelona… His heart is already in Barcelona, even though we must wait another year for his body to be here.”

Lionel Messi seeped:  “Cesc has a place for Arsenal in his heart, but he has Barcelona in his blood. He will want to win win the biggest prizes in football, and I expect him to do that at Barcelona.”

The bullshit around Cesc is monumental.

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Posted: 12th, June 2014 | In: Chelsea, Sports | Comment


Transfer Balls: Arsenal Woo Fabregas Who Passes Chelsea Medical Twice

TRANSFER Balls with the Daily Fabregas – Anorak’s look at today’s reporting on the Barcelona player.

TalkSport cites the Daily Mirror:

Arsenal are passing up their right of first refusal to buy Fabregas back, as they feel they have greater priorities elsewhere…

That’s TalkSport, the organ that told its readers on June 5:

 

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The Daily Star has other news:

EXCLUSIVE: Manchester United end hunt for ex-Arsenal man Cesc Fabregas

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Posted: 12th, June 2014 | In: Arsenal, Chelsea, Sports | Comment