Books | Anorak - Part 11

Books Category

The latest books and literature reviews, comment, features and interviews, with extracts from famous texts and neglected gems.

Helping the Retarded to Know God

BOOK of the day: Helping the Retarded to Know God. Published 1969 by Contordia.

Add it to the list of terrible book titles.


Posted: 13th, January 2013 | In: Books, Flashback | Comments (2)

Self-help books are only for the educated

EVER buy a self-help book? Laura Vanderkam notes:

[T]he people who buy these books are, like all book buyers, “pretty comfortable,” says John Duff of Penguin. “It’s going to be that middle-class person, reasonably well-educated” and in “very rarefied” company, as “our market for all books is really very limited. Most people stop reading when they leave school.” Those who don’t stop probably have their acts together.

Call it the paradox of self-help. “The type of person who values self-control and self-improvement is the type of person who would seek more of it in a self-help book,”Whelan says. “So it’s not the unemployed crazy lady sitting on the couch eating potato chips who reads self-help. It’s the educated, affluent, probably fairly successful person who wants to better themselves.”

Read the rest of this entry »

Posted: 9th, January 2013 | In: Books | Comment

Self-help book of the day: How to Good-bye Depression: If You Constrict Anus 100 Times Everyday

BOOK of the day is for those of viewing the gaping year ahead with apathy and misery. It’s Hiroyuki Nishigaki’s How to Good-bye Depression: If You Constrict Anus 100 Times Everyday. Malarkey? or Effective Way?


I think constricting anus 100 times and denting navel 100 times in succession everyday is effective to good-bye depression and take back youth. You can do so at a boring meeting or in a subway. I have known 70-year-old man who has practiced it for 20 years. As a result, he has good complexion and has grown 20 years younger. His eyes sparkle. He is full of vigor, happiness and joy. He has neither complained nor born a grudge under any circumstance. Furthermore, he can make #### three times in succession without drawing out.In addition, he also can have burned a strong beautiful fire within his abdomen. It can burn out the dirty stickiness of his body, release his immaterial fiber or third attention which has been confined to his stickiness. Then, he can shoot out his immaterial fiber or third attention to an object, concentrate on it and attain happy lucky feeling through the success of concentration.If you don’t know concentration which gives you peculiar pleasure, your life looks like a hell.

Read the rest of this entry »

Posted: 1st, January 2013 | In: Books | Comment (1)

1941: Home Meat Curing Made Easy (with Pig FISTING)

IN Home Meat Curing Made Easy, home butchers back in 1941 could learn how to cut up a pig, a lamb or any family member and rub it into tasty glory. It was a book also enjoyed by mass murderers:

Read the rest of this entry »

Posted: 30th, December 2012 | In: Books, Flashback | Comment

April Bloomfield’s A Girl and Her Pig: Recipes and Stories – the hilarious reviews

WHAT are the critics saying about British-born, New York-based chef April Bloomfield’s A Girl and Her Pig: Recipes and Stories? If you like eating pigs, it promises to be cracking read. Her intro even offers the chance to chortle: “When I was girl, I wanted to be a policewoman…”

She turned to another kind of piggery for a career. On Amazon, though, many are outraged and upset. The reviews are memorable.

Pity the piglets:

This is the most disgusting cover and should be taken out from any book display… The cover of this book is absolutely disgusting, revolting and insensitive… I don’t think I can hold it in my hand without cringing, and I cannot imagine the “book” being displayed where young children are present.

I read no more:

This is the most disgusting cover and should be taken out from any book display.The killing of animal for food is a fact of life but doesnt need to be shown as a trophee. In fact as soon as it appear on Amazon, it simply put me off culinary book altogether. I am a regular customer of cook books but i have to say that this put me off completely to buy anything for a long time – Nash

I saw this book in a bookstore and felt bad for the poor pig, what angered me next was a woman who dragged her young daughter over to see it and they both laughed. What the hell is wrong with people when they find dead animals amusing? I really wanted to slap both of them! It’s a very sad world we live in 🙁 – Gail Witham

Meanwhile…in Russia: 

What a tasteless, insensitive, repulsive cover. Dead baby animal on display. Don’t bother to argue that is what meat is. Graveyards are full of corpses. I don’t need to see photos of them displayed on the cemetary walls  – CBC

I’m not pigist but…:

I would lose my appetite everytime I picked up this cookbook to prepare anything from it.

I’m not a chef. I’m an ordinary person who likes to cook and entertain. I do handle larger cuts of meat and poultry that I cut up myself. I’ve cleaned freshly caught fish…

This is America, the land of free speech and the right to express an opinion… I am not willing to spend my money on a product that carelessly displays a dead animal for commercial appeal – Cathy

Do judge a book by its cover:

Poor pig that got murdered. I find the cover distasteful. Dont judge a book by it’s covers? In this case, I have! – Don Grego

The Malaysian sequel- A Girl and her Puppy:

It saddens me to see a book so casually flaunting a killed pig. Actually, this is only a piglet.. several weeks old. Would this be so acceptable had it been a calf (“veal”), or better yet a puppy? – L. Jorgensen



Who else if off to buy one, then..?

Posted: 29th, December 2012 | In: Books | Comment (1)

Eye of Sauron made of Stacked Tolkien Books

ONE day all bookshops will sell books stacked into a theme. This stack features books by Tolkein:

Spotter:22 Words

Posted: 4th, December 2012 | In: Books | Comment

Julie Burchill: Unchosen: The Memoirs of a Philosemite

 A WHILE back I (along with others) received an email from the divine goddess Julie Burchill. She was seeking my financial support for a book she wants to publish called Unchosen: The Memoirs of a Philosemite – about her adoration of the Jewish race. She had signed up to a crowd-funding publishing outfit called Unbound – if an author can find enough loot via backers (ie interested readers with cash) to sponsor their book, then they, too, will find themselves between covers.

Read the rest of this entry »

Posted: 22nd, November 2012 | In: Books | Comments (7)

Inappropriate bar code: the Paediatric Handbook

INAPPROPRIATE bar code placement of the day: the Paediatric Handbook:

Posted: 26th, October 2012 | In: Books | Comment

Stieg Larsson’s letter to Eva Gabrielsson

STIEG Larsson wrote a letter to his partner, Eva Gabrielsson. On November 9th of 2004, Stieg Larsson died. He was 50. He left behind a letter. The envelope was titled:  “To be opened only after my death”.

Read the rest of this entry »

Posted: 12th, October 2012 | In: Books, Celebrities | Comments (2)

Jimmy Savile book of the day: Other People’s Children – A Handbook for Child Minders

JIMMY Savile book of the day: Other People’s Childrena Handbook for Child Minders”… Previously: Love Is An Uphill Thing and Benjamin Rabbit and the Stranger Danger

Spotter: Dangerous Minds

Posted: 10th, October 2012 | In: Books, Celebrities | Comments (5)

Jimmy Savile Book of the day: ‘Love Is An Uphill Thing’

JIMMY Savile book of the day:  “The rags-to-riches autobiography of JIMMY SAVILE OBE – LOVE IS AN UPHILL THING.”

Previously in Jimmy Savile books.


Posted: 9th, October 2012 | In: Books, Celebrities | Comment (1)

Jimmy Savile’s ‘Benjamin Rabbit and the Stranger Danger – What a child needs to know about strangers’

BECAUSE we are reviewing Jimmy Savile’s life’s work in light of allegations of him attacking young girls, we cast an eye over the introduction he wrote for Irene Keller’s book Benjamin Rabbit and the Stranger Danger – What a child needs to know about strangers.

It’s the familiar faces you need to worry about…

Read the rest of this entry »

Posted: 2nd, October 2012 | In: Books, Celebrities | Comment

Funny names of real authors

FUNNY names of real authors. (The author of the family planning book is ANITA HARDON)…

Read the rest of this entry »

Posted: 27th, September 2012 | In: Books | Comment

Rod Hull’s Emu On His Own might be the saddest book ever

IS Rod Hull’s Emu on his Own the world’s saddest book?

Spotter: @scaryduck

Posted: 22nd, September 2012 | In: Books | Comment

Buy work by Roger Hiscocks

NOMINATIVE determinism? Roger Hiscocks has a book:


Posted: 19th, September 2012 | In: Books | Comment

Joseph Anton: life for Salman Rushdie under the fatwa

ONE good thing about that 1989 fatwa – it gave Salman Rushdie something to write about, other than naughty but nice cream slices and fallen angels. To plug his new book, Joseph Anton, Rushdie talks about life under a death sentence:

He unlocked the front door, went outside, got into the car, and was driven away. Although he did not know it then — so the moment of leaving his home did not feel unusually freighted with meaning — he would not return to that house, at 41 St. Peter’s Street, which had been his home for half a decade, until three years later, by which time it would no longer be his.

Read the rest of this entry »

Posted: 13th, September 2012 | In: Books | Comment

The Colony Room bio! a Soho establishment story

I NEVER had the pleasure of being called ‘c*nty’ by Soho’s Colony Room founder and proprietor Muriel Belcher. Some people have all the luck. So, I’ll have to settle for second best.

Sophie Parkin’s history book of the high culture boozing parlour, The Colony Club 1948-2008, is due out on 10 December 2012 – and she’s declared open a dedicated website where you can find more details – click here.

Read the rest of this entry »

Posted: 11th, September 2012 | In: Books | Comment

50 Shades of Grey – the Lego years

50 Shades of Grey: the Lego years:


Posted: 4th, August 2012 | In: Books | Comment

The Blood We Share: Ian Huntley’s brother Wayne investigates Soham murderer’s path to murder

WAYNE Huntley has written a book, published to coincide with the 10th anniversary of the murder of Holly Wells and Jessica Chapman, the schoolgirls murdered by his older brother Ian Huntley in Soham, Cambridgeshire. The Blood We Share has been front-page news on the Sun, which yesterday yelled: “FAMILY FURY AT KILLER 10 YEARS ON – I WISH MY EVIL BROTHER HUNTLEY WAS DEAD.”

The Sun detailed elements of Huntley’s “cushy” life in prison. He “DEVOURS steaks” and eats “slap-up meals”. And:

LOVES watching Manchester United games on prison TV — unmoved by the fact that his two victims were wearing the team’s red shirts when he killed them.

That Ian Huntley is a nasty piece of work seems unworthy of additional comment. But rather than wishing him dead, as the headline states, Wayne Huntley suggests his brother has a conscience that does not allow to face the truth:

“I believe he knows the truth is too awful for him to admit — it would mean even more people in prison would want to kill him.”

Read the rest of this entry »

Posted: 9th, July 2012 | In: Books, Key Posts, Reviews | Comment (1)

Poetry of the Taliban – ‘The Taliban’s aesthetic sensibilities’ in rhymes

BOOK of the day: Poetry of the Taliban, with introduction from Hous bin Pharteen and Mustafa Herod Apyur Pouppr, translated into English by Norm de Poom and German by Hans Zupp. It’s distributed by Pharoah Nuff books and published by Warren Peace. No, of course not. This book is no parody. It’s the real deal.

The contrast between the severity of their professed ideology and the license of the Taliban’s aesthetic sensibilities – in which unrequited love, bloody vengeance and the thrill of battle, religion and nationalism, even a desire for non-violence, are expressed through images of wine, powerful women, song, legend and pastoral beauty – provide a fascinating insight into the minds and hearts of these deeply emotional people.

Read the rest of this entry »

Posted: 28th, June 2012 | In: Books | Comments (6)

Clive James and his Unreliable Memoirs – what every adolescent boy should read

CLIVE James is not dead. Twitter lit up with news that the writer and raconteur was dead. He isn’t But he is ill. I read one of his books when younger. James has leukaemia, kidney failure and lung disease. James, the TV reviewer who went on to make great telly, told the BBC:

“I’ve been really ill for two-and-a-half years. I’m getting near the end. I’m a man who is approaching his terminus.”

If you like “Twin miracles of mascara, Barbara Cartland’s eyes look like the corpses of two small crows that had crashed into a chalk cliff“, I urge you to read Unreliable Memoirs, an account of his early years. It’s a cracking read that any adolsescent boy needs to look at. Adult males should look at it again.

Read the rest of this entry »

Posted: 24th, June 2012 | In: Books, Celebrities | Comments (2)

The 10 most awful books covers and titles

ARE these the 10 most awful book titles and covers in English literature? (More epic covers here. And more lusty stuff is here.)


Picture 1 of 9

Posted: 19th, June 2012 | In: Books, Key Posts | Comment

Have you read the Necromonicon?

HAVE you read the Necromonicon? It’s Al-Azif’s , aka Abdul Alhazred, greatest work. It was translated by  H. P. Lovecraft in 922.

“If knowing the unknowable is crazy…I don’t want to be saved…”

Some background:

In 2005 I was called, in my capacity of Artisan’s Book, to look after the restoration of a book found in an old house-in-Vhallennes Weppes (59 North) by a Notary following the death of the owner.

The book, in a terrible state, has been identified as a French translation of Kitab al-Azif of Abul Hazred by historians, antiquarians and bibliologues also called on the restoration project and studies.

A restoration workshop was installed instead of Vhallennes to limit additional damage that could cause repeated displacements

After a long series of photographs of over 600 pages of the book, the book has been fully digitized in order to list all the missing parts, whether physical, graphic or typographical

In 2007 the first tests of facsimiles have even created through a process of ever more powerful computer.

The identity of the author of this translation, dated 1751, remains obscure to date. However, it is possible to advance the name of Alceste-Tudal-Aymour ARTOIS , a Theosophist who had distinguished himself in many translations of works in Semitic languages. The blibliologues, Thomas Vandeleare , has no knowledge of authors of that era that could cause such work on an Arabic text of the 8 th century. The fact that D’Artois ATA has decided Keep anonymity on a work such as this one remains a mystery total.


Posted: 18th, June 2012 | In: Books | Comment (1)