The Consumer | Anorak - Part 41

The Consumer Category

We bring you the chic and unique, the best and most bizarre shopping offers both online and offline. We offer you tips on where to buy, and some of the less mainstream and crazy, individual and offbeat items on the internet. Anything that can be bought and sold can be featured here. And we love showcasing the best and worst art and design.

Infuse Your Home WIth the Kentucky Fried Chicken Candle


kfc candle

NOW you too can smell like a Kentucky Fried Chicken, thanks to the KFC scented candle, by Kathy Werking.

To make these candles, she fries chicken in all-natural soy wax and adds an infusion of family secrets.

Kentucky for Kentucky thrills us: “Let the fresh, fried sizzle of savory golden goodness drift into your hearts and homes with one of our most delectable creations to date.”



Posted: 20th, November 2013 | In: The Consumer | Comment

Worms in Wendy’s BLT Salad Are Not About The Money

worm wendy's

“I TASTED something sour. And I was like ‘wait, this is strange.’ I spit it out and then I see what looked like a worm to me,” says Ivette . She’d bought a Wendy’s BLT salad from a Florida drive-thru. “That’s the worm that I actually saw on the salad, not the one that was in my mouth. That was a different worm that was in the salad.”

She took the worm back to the eatery.

“They just brushed it off. Like it’s not a big deal. It’s just a worm. But today it’s a worm, what’s it going to be next time?” Ivette asked, who froze the salad. “I went to the hospital because I felt nauseated the entire time.”

Because this is America, Ivette has a lawyer to fight for her rights (ie: money). The worm has no official representation. Says attorney Mark Pacin.

“My client didn’t come to me and say ‘I want money.’ They came to me and said we want to make sure that others are aware as to what’s going on. This is not about money, this is really about public concern.”

And what price can be placed on that?


Posted: 20th, November 2013 | In: The Consumer | Comment

The Rolling Stones Were Proud To Withstand ‘Under-Age Sex’ – The 1994 Poster And T-Shirt



ONCE upon a time “underage sex” was a selling point used by The Rolling Stones’ marketing department. Back in 1994 for the Stones’ Voodoo Lounge tour, the legend went:

“Stones Withstand Divorce, Slander, Rip-Offs, Slagging, Under-Age Sex, Alcohol, Drugs”

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Posted: 19th, November 2013 | In: Flashback, Music, The Consumer | Comment

Johny Ive: The World’s Most Famous Designer And Reluctant Knight


LEANDER Kahney is talking about the world’s most famous designer, Essex-boy and graduate of Newcastle Polytechnic done very good,  Johny Ive. British writer Kahney has profiled the Apple legend in Jony Ive: The Genius Behind Apple’s Greatest Products. Here are a few extracts:

Phil Gray, who was his first boss after he graduated from design school, met him at the Olympics in London. “When I asked Sir Jony what was it like being a knight of the realm, he replied, ‘You know what? Out in San Francisco it means absolutely nothing. But back in Britain it is a burden.’”

At 25, he was headhunted by Apple.

“I remember very clearly Steve announcing that our goal is not just to make money but to make great products,” Ive later recalled. “The decisions you make based on that philosophy are fundamentally different from the ones we had been making at Apple… We were on the same wavelength. I suddenly understood why I loved the company.”

In the design studio:

Ive has the only private office. The front wall and door are made of glass, with stainless steel fittings, just like the ones in Apple’s shops. Except for a small shelf system, the office is bare with plain white walls, featuring no pictures of his family or design awards; just a desk, chair and lamp.

jonny-ive 99

Ive is Apple’s soul:

Just before he died on October 5, 2011, Jobs revealed the degree to which he had empowered Ive inside the company. “He has more operational power than anyone else at Apple except me,” Jobs said. “There’s no one who can tell him what to do, or to butt out. That’s the way I set it up.”

Said Ive:

“Our goal isn’t to make money. Our goal absolutely at Apple is not to make money. This may sound a little flippant, but it’s the truth. Our goal and what gets us excited is to try to make great products. We trust that if we are successful, people will like them, and if we are operationally competent, we will make revenue, but we are very clear about our goal.”

Well, I bought an Ive original. Then I bought another. And another…


Do Ive’s products match /reflect his changing of style? For hat Apple do next, wonder about Johny’s state of mind? He’s middle-aged; he’ll be thinking slim and knowing.



Lead Photo: In this file photo taken March 19, 1999, Jonathan Ive, left, Apple’s vice president of design, and Jon Rubinstein, Apple’s senior vice president of engineering, pose behind five iMac personal computers, at Apple headquarters in Cupertino, Calif. Apple CEO Steve Jobs may be the company’s most recognizable personality, but much of its cachet comes from its clean, friendly-looking designs, the product of its head designer, Jonathan Ive.

Posted: 17th, November 2013 | In: Money, Technology, The Consumer | Comment

Dave’s Killer Bread Founder Smashes A Life-Sized Cutout Of Himself And Goes Bonkers

dave killer bread


“HE went into the store and he smashed a life-sized cutout of himself because he’s the symbol of a brand,” says the witness to the 911 operator in Washington County.  “And he’s intimidating employees that are watching him. Basically, talking … preaching.”

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Posted: 17th, November 2013 | In: Strange But True, The Consumer | Comment

Does Sugar Make Your Children Hyper? No

sugar hyper


DOES sugar make your children hyper? No:


The BBC agreed:

The theory that too much sugar makes children hyperactive doesn’t stand up to the tests – it may be that the environment your child is in is the defining factor in how boisterous their mood is. This doesn’t mean sugar get’s off lightly though. It may not lead to hyperactivity but it does make your blood sugar drop which could make your children irritable and distracted.




Or as the wife of The Education Minister says in her column (you can keep the writing gig Sarah Vine as long as Gove keeps his job):


Screen shot 2013-11-16 at 11.17.38





Posted: 16th, November 2013 | In: Reviews, The Consumer | Comment

Tesco Sold Clay iPad To Kent Baker (Then Police Arrested Him For Fraud)

clay ipad

“I COUDN’T believe it when I saw what was inside the box. Maddie was devastated,” says Colin Marsh, who paid £470 for at Tesco in Whitstable, Kent. “I took it back to Tesco, but they said they couldn’t give me a refund and would need to carry out an investigation. Two days later, I got a call at about 8pm from the police asking if I could come down to the station to answer some questions. I just thought they wanted to know what had happened, but the next thing I know I’m being bundled into a cell. I was in there for three hours. It was then they told me the iPad had been activated in my name. I just thought ‘how can that possibly be?’ It didn’t make any sense.

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Posted: 16th, November 2013 | In: Technology, The Consumer | Comment

Dayna Morales: Waitress Denied Tip For Being Gay – Internet Goes Crazy And Lovely

UPDATE:   A husband and wife tell NBC 4 New York they did leave a tip. They say they have a credit card statement as proof. The tip was a generous $18. The wife says: “We’ve never not left a tip when someone gave good service, and we would never leave a note like that.”

Morales adds: “I don’t know, all I know is what I’ve been saying.”

Morales had recently announced that people were sending her tips from all over the world, and was donating some of the money to the Wounded Warrior Project. “I just felt like people have a right to know that — it’s fine if people want to donate to her or to the Wounded Warriors, but they’re doing it under a false pretense,” the wife said.


This is the original story:

WE all know that idiots get weird around gay people. Presumably their brains get tied in knots because they constantly and vividly imagine all that sex they do. They get a clear image in their minds about glistening gay naked bodies all writhing around. That’s because, absolutely 100% across the board, bigots are all a bit pervy.

And so to a waitress in New Jersey who had her £10 tip withheld and was left a crappy note by a bigoted customer, allegedly. She says she was denied her tip because she is a gay woman. She told the internet and now, she’s been inundated with more than £1,000 in donations from around the world.

no tip

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Posted: 15th, November 2013 | In: Money, Reviews, Strange But True, The Consumer | Comments (2)

Can Page 3 Girls Really Sell Hot Buffalo Wings? No…

ANROAK is old enough to recall the days when smut was a copy of Penthouse is a hedge. Once upon a time, smut was remarkably un-erotic. The nostalgia-proof  Great British sex comedy, gurning faces, with badly-dressed people in terrible bars captured in sickly colour tones by radiators. The smut industry was an ugly business. But have things changed much? No. Not judging by this photos form this PR event featuring Page 3 girls Brandy Brewer (left) and Gracie for the UK’s first Frank’s RedHot Buffalo Wing eating competition at Sticky Wings in East London.



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Posted: 15th, November 2013 | In: The Consumer | Comment

Semenology – The Semen Bartender’s Handbook

STUCK for a cocktail? You need semen. In Semenology – The Semen Bartender’s Handbook you can learn how to enliven your drinks.

Semenology - The Semen Bartender's Handbook



A Personal Touch (or several)


1 Semenology - The Semen Bartender's Handbook



Anorak’s drink expert recommends a Semen Shake to accompany…




Posted: 15th, November 2013 | In: Books, The Consumer | Comment

Britney Spears Smells Of Clowns’ Farts

spears circus

BRITNEY Spears is back. And to herald her return to Anorak’s pages, a new perfume. Her sheets have been scraped, her towels wrung out over a buckets and her underwear and hair ground to a fine powder. And you can now smell of Circus Fantasy.

According to the blurb:

The spectacle opens with juicy accords of sugar-coated raspberry and apricot blossom, reminiscent of tempting candy.

It’s stickier than Noddy’s bell on the roundabout.

The magic continues as blue peony, waterlily and addictive red sweetheart orchid take the limelight with delicious sensations and exhilarating temptations. The grand finale is a captivating sense of seductive sensuality, blending sweet vanilla wood, creamy musks and violet candy.

To recap: smells of lion’s breath and clown farts.

Comes in handy atomiser – see above.

Posted: 15th, November 2013 | In: Celebrities, The Consumer | Comment

Tesco Stars In An Unusual C-Word Conversation On Twitter

tesco mad



That’s how it began. And then it got weird.

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Posted: 14th, November 2013 | In: Technology, The Consumer | Comment

Great Ads: Jean-Claude Van Damme Splits for Volvo

GREAT Ads: Jean-Claude Van Damme for Volvo:

Posted: 14th, November 2013 | In: Celebrities, The Consumer | Comment

Who In The Vatican Stole A Copy Of Football Manager 2013?


WHO in the Vatican downloaded a pirated version of Football Manager 2013?

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Posted: 14th, November 2013 | In: Reviews, The Consumer | Comment

Sheffield Man With Fire Extinguisher Hose Up His Bum Racially Abused Staff At London Premier Inn

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TO the Premier Inn on London’s Leicester Square, where CCTV records a man emerging from a storage cupboard with a fire extinguisher hose up his bottom. He is pleasuring himself. He then urinates on the carpets. A hotel worker arrives. He is carrying a towel. This worker is Bangladeshi. He wraps the man in the towel. Police are called.

Wind the clock forward and Joseph Small, 20, is in the dock at Westminster magistrates’ court. The court hears that he told the hotel worker: ‘This country has been taken over by al-Qaeda – go back to Pakistan.”

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Posted: 13th, November 2013 | In: Reviews, Strange But True, The Consumer | Comment

Cockney Of The North: Northumberland Widow Receives ‘Brown Bread’ Letter For Dead Husband

dead man slang


ARE you brown bread? That’s Cockney rhyming slang for “dead”. Sheila Delhoy spotted the phrase on a letter sent to her husband Ken who died in February 2008. In 2010, Northumberland-based building suppliers Wack wrote to “Brown Bread” Ken. Now the same firm has delivered another letter to “Brown Bread”.

Says Sheila: “When my son Tony found out he rang the company straight away. He said to them ‘are you going to make this an annual thing to remind my mum her husband is dead and make her upset?’”

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Posted: 13th, November 2013 | In: Reviews, Strange But True, The Consumer | Comment

Chorley Shoplifter Had Massive Hoard Of Toilet Paper

TO Chorley, Lancashire, where, as ever things are afoot. Not a day goes by without  incident in Chorley:



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Posted: 13th, November 2013 | In: Strange But True, The Consumer | Comments (13)

Terrible Food: WeightWatchers Crown Roast of Frankfurters

TERRIBLE Food: WeightWatchers Crown Roast of Frankfurters. Because nothing says ‘slim’ like being sick:



More terrifying food from yesteryear…

Posted: 13th, November 2013 | In: Flashback, The Consumer | Comment