Anorak

The Consumer | Anorak - Part 96

The Consumer Category

We bring you the chic and unique, the best and most bizarre shopping offers both online and offline. We offer you tips on where to buy, and some of the less mainstream and crazy, individual and offbeat items on the internet. Anything that can be bought and sold can be featured here. And we love showcasing the best and worst art and design.

How Online Hotel Photos Can Lie: The Fantasy And Reality Gallery

EVER book a room at a hotel on the strength of the online brochure photo?  Oyster has produced examples of how the photos does not alway live up to the reality? Is it good marketing or an outright lie that makes the pool look huge and the room have a to-die-for view? Let’s see – each fantasy photo is followed by the real one:

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Posted: 4th, March 2011 | In: Key Posts, The Consumer | Comments (2)


Celebrities Polish Giant Pig Turd In Westminster

SO. There we were on Whitehall, when Christine Hamilton, Sharron Davies and Liz McClarnon arrived and stood by a gigantic turd.

While Old Mr Anorak popped off to borrow a chamois leather from a relative up the red road round the corner– McLarnon, once of Atomic Kitten is due a comeback; and Hamilton did make her Neil famous – someone said it was not a turd but a big fake sausage that would be signed for a rally organised by the National Pig Association.

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Posted: 3rd, March 2011 | In: The Consumer | Comment


A Triumph In Bras And Knickers At London Fashion Week: Photos

AMID these photos of the Triumph bra and knickers fashion show at London Fashion week is a photo of celebrity bath runner Tamara Ecclestone. Can you find her..?

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A model on the catwalk at the Triumph catwalk show, at Somerset House, in central London, as part of London Fashion Week.

Posted: 23rd, February 2011 | In: The Consumer | Comment


London Fashion Week 2011: The MAN Has A Head for Fashion

LONDON Fashion week: At the MAN Catwalk show, a design by New Power Studio at the Royal Opera House seems to say so much about fashion…

Posted: 23rd, February 2011 | In: The Consumer | Comments (3)


Wristband Indicates Wife’s Menstrual Cycle: Worst Tampon Ads Ever

THE ‘Help for Husbands‘ bracelet has been invented by Karl Dorn to show men when women wearing the thing are suffering from PMT.

It’s an idea. And that’s all it is. There is no working prototype and no patent. Says Dorn:

“Through my research I’ve found out that women’s body temperatures increase at certain times of the month. This little wristband would be temperature sensitive and change colour.”

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Posted: 23rd, February 2011 | In: The Consumer | Comment


Car Logo Kit Says All Germans Are Nazis

FLAG Story of the Day sees the makers of a car logo kit harps back to the glory days of German empire.

Vorsprung durch Blitzkrieg, as they still say in the Austrian hills…

Posted: 21st, February 2011 | In: The Consumer | Comment (1)


Hampshire Lapland Con: Defiant Parent Say Santa Is Real And Reindeer Can Fly

BIG news from Hampshire is that brothers Victor and Henry Mears have been convicted of misleading thousands of customers into visiting a what they claimed was a Lapland-style theme park.

Yep, they misled customers looking to, er, meet Santa, ride in his magic sleigh, pat the hands of little elves that make your toys for free and pet the flying reindeer.

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Posted: 18th, February 2011 | In: Key Posts, The Consumer | Comment


London Fashion Week Photos: Sticks And Stoners

LONDON Fashion Week is here…again. For all the fashion you can shake a stick-thin mo-del at got to Stylebrity

Posted: 18th, February 2011 | In: The Consumer | Comment


Orgy Of The Rich: Art Collectors Eat Clay At Cuts Protest

WERE you in New Bond Street for the Arts Against CutsUK Uncut and Space Hijackers protest against government cuts? The protest as called “orgy of the rich“. (We used to want to eat them, but shagging them first might be more tasteful.)

Meanwhile, inside Sotherby’s contemporary art auction, the money on the wall went for £44.4 million. The highlight as a pile of 1,000 hand-painted porcelain sunflower seeds by Ai Weiwei sold to a telephone bidder for £349,250.
That’s almost as mush as actual commodities are going for.

As they say at the orgy: “Let them eat clay!

Posted: 18th, February 2011 | In: The Consumer | Comment


Banksy’s First Artwork Found On Toilet Door: LA Pictures Are Authentic

IS that a Banksy artwork on a wall in Los Angeles? Anorak recalls the artist first daubings on the cubicle door at the Kebab and Moon public house in Bournemouth. That rudimentary ejaculating penis showed the kind of spray work evidenced in Charlie Brown’s smoke (see photos below). We can say that it is him. And if you want to buy the original Banksy Wanksy, you can by sending us tens of thousands of pounds in cash stuffed into a self addressed envelope…

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Art work on a wall in Los Angeles reputed to be done by the British graffiti artist Banksy.

Posted: 18th, February 2011 | In: The Consumer | Comment (1)


Rats On A Stick And Other Street Treats: Photos Of Revolting Food

STREET foods of the world: Rats on a stick? Anyone..? What about pig snout, also on a stick? Strawberries and bananas covered in sugar? They sound pretty good. And just great after a mouthful of bugs on a stick, starfish on a stick and the lizards on a stick. Our advice, eat the stick and chuck away the wrapper…

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Duck heads

Posted: 18th, February 2011 | In: Key Posts, The Consumer | Comments (2)


RIP Ron Collins: The Cinzano Ad Was ITV’s Best Sit-Com

RIP Ron Collins. Advertising gets a bad press. But the WCRS founder was responsible for those Cinzano starring Leonard Rossiter and Joan Collins. This was the TV sit-com that never got made. You just got to see the best joke:

Posted: 18th, February 2011 | In: The Consumer | Comment


Harry Potter Bouncy Castle Is The Inappropriate Toy Of The Day

THE Harry Potter bouncy castle is the Inappropriate Toy of The Day.

Previously: Buzz Lightyear Sip Cup Is The Inappropriate Toy Of The Day

Posted: 17th, February 2011 | In: The Consumer | Comment


Countdown Anaslam: Nintendo Wii Abuses Players

PEOPLE playing a Nintedndo Wii version of Countdown are “SHITHEADS”.

Not out view, but that of the game’s makers. But Victoria Smith says she is no “SHITHEADS” and neither is her son Oliver, 3, whom she bought the game for to try to improve his vocabulary by playing the conundrum – a nine-letter anagram for “SHITHEADS”.

The lad puzzled over the anagram “SHAHSITED”. What could it mean? And then the legend was reveled. Of course: “SHITHEADS.”

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Posted: 11th, February 2011 | In: The Consumer | Comment


Snail Found In Tesco Duck Wrap Stars On BBC Show

THE Tesco’s fusion cuisine Hoi Sin Duck Wrap contains an added bit of crunch: a snail.

Sue Gray, 39, chomped down on her fancy sandwich and bit into a live snail. Her teeth shattered parts of its shell.

Says Sue, who works at the BBC:

“I was in the newsroom at work eating it and then I crunched something which I first thought must be a loose filling. When I saw a piece of shell, I immediately spat the rest of the wrap out on to the packaging and saw the snail. The girl sat next to me was horrified and I felt awful. I ran to the toilets straight away to wash my mouth out and clean my hands.”

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Posted: 11th, February 2011 | In: The Consumer | Comment (1)


Victoria’s Secret Model Loses Arm In Photo Shoot

VICTORIA’S Secret models are not all arms and legs – sometimes they are arm and legs.

In this photo Marisa Miller shows off “The Sexiest Polo” for the amputee community.

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Posted: 7th, February 2011 | In: The Consumer | Comment


Egypt: Kenneth Cole Sees Five Dead As A Marketing Opportunity

THANKS to the good people at Kenneth Cole the Egyptian protests – at least five deaths so far! – is now a marketing opportunity for belts, bags and shoes. The brand used the #Cairo hashtag to market its range of goods.

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Posted: 4th, February 2011 | In: The Consumer | Comment


How To Be Taller: Add ‘Solid Height’ For $47

WHAT is the “idiot-proof way” to get taller? At GrowTaller4Idiots.com, you can learn how to add 3 or even 4 inches to your HEIGHT. Don’t be like the “short guy” in the adverts. He’s bald. He’s got bins like Olive from On The Buses. He’s wearing a terrible suit. He has very small feet like a goat. But worse than that he’s SHORT. His tall associate is a patronising fool, but he’s in the land above your head, where everyone has Hollywood hair and reassuringly big feet. He is successful.

Says one user:

I Discovered the Secret to Add Several Inches of Solid Height to Anyone, No Matter What Your Age Is… Even If You Haven’t Grown in Years!

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Posted: 3rd, February 2011 | In: The Consumer | Comment


London College of Fashion’s MA Graduate Fashion Show Catwalk Photos: Hospital Chic

THE London College of Fashion’s MA Graduate Fashion Show – Catwalk photos: Hospital Chic hits the catwalk. It’s what all the cool kids will be wearing on the wards…

More: Stylebrity

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A model wears designs by Joanne Power the London College of Fashion MA graduate fashion show, at the Victoria and Albert museum in central London

Posted: 3rd, February 2011 | In: The Consumer | Comments (7)


Marks and Spencer’s Launches Austerity Range

AT the launch of a range of Marks and Spencer’s Nearly Naked lingerie outside the Marble Arch store in central London, Anorak stopped and wondered: Why are most photographers men?

Posted: 3rd, February 2011 | In: The Consumer | Comment


Kraft Brings Back Rationing To Britain: Cadbury’s Daily Milk Loses Two Chunks

FIRST CADBURY is sold to Americans. Then it reduces the size of its Dairy Milk bar by two squares – the 140g bar is now 120g. But – yep -the price remains the same.

Do Kraft Foods, the new owners of Cadbury, think the UK is still living on rations and Yanks can come over here and woo us with their chocolate and nylons?

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Posted: 2nd, February 2011 | In: The Consumer | Comments (2)


Woman Finds New Life Form Inside Can Of Beans

A WOMAN opened her can of beans, bought at the FoodMaxx store in Bakersville, California, and found this inside.

Anyone know what it is?

Posted: 1st, February 2011 | In: The Consumer | Comments (2)


Giant Colombian Ants In A Can Taste Like Bacon

YOU don’t have to be a giant Colombian to like giant Colombian ants now that the itchy treats come in cans. And the best bit about them is that they taste like bacon.

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Posted: 1st, February 2011 | In: The Consumer | Comment (1)


Bid For Fake Sunflower Seeds And Picasso’s Sex Life At Sotheby’s Impressionist and Modern Art Sale

THERE is money in art. Lots of it. At Sotheby’s Impressionist and Modern Art Sale, London, you can get close to a bowl of Ai Weiwei’s Sunflower Seeds. You can buy 100 kilos of his life-sized porcelain “seeds” for between £80,000 and £120,000. The portrait of Frans Hellens by Amedeo Modigliani is earmarked at £3 million. David Hockney’s Hotel L’Arbois Sainte Maxime of 1968, should fetch £2 million. The triptych, three studies for a portrait of Lucian Freud by Francis Bacon, will go for a lot more than £9 million. And for any banker aiming to look arty, the Picasso Portrait of his mistress and muse Marie-Therese from 1932 is expected to fetch around £18 million. And you thought extra-martial sex never paid off…

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Ai Weiwei's Sunflower Seeds go on display at the Sotheby's Impressionist and Modern Art Sale, London.

Posted: 31st, January 2011 | In: The Consumer | Comment


Toxic Waste Candy Contains Actual Toxins: Kids Love It

THAT Toxic Waste candy does exactly what it saw on the packet: it is packed with lead. The Nuclear Sludge sweetie imported form Pakistan is no good for you.

Circle City Marketing and Distributing, in Indiana (trading as Candy Dynamics) is recalling its Toxic Waste brand sour candies.

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Posted: 31st, January 2011 | In: The Consumer | Comment