Anorak

TV & Radio | Anorak - Part 80

TV & Radio Category

Television and radio programme reviews, trailers, highlights, twilights and cinema news. Also the neglected gems from years past.

Russian Driving Tip Of The Day: The Tow Excuse Me

THIS Week’s Driving Tip of the day is brought to you by the Russian driver who tried to navigate his vehicle between one car towing another car. In Russia, this is how you drive. You pick the shortest route and go for it. If anyone is in the way, hoot the horn. If a building is in the way, hoot harder…

Posted: 11th, April 2010 | In: TV & Radio | Comment (1)


Britain’s Got Talent: Janey Cutler Might Be Susan Boyle

BRITAIN’S Got Talent looms and we get to meet Janey Cutler, billed as this year’s Susan Boyle.

In the tabloids, Britain’s Go Talent is a chance for ugly people to do well. We don’t mean ugly as in grotesque, just ugly as in Unlikely Gods Like Yourself (TM).

While the X Factor positions lip-synching Cheryl Cole – with a conviction for assault; neck tattoo and shaggability – as the nation’s sweetheart, the X Factor resident babe is eyebrow wrangler Amanda Holden. Holden is hard-to-like. But unlike Cole who looks out of reach for watching dads and sticky finger adolescents, the former Mrs Les Dennis seems within reach, the tarty office secretary who might at the Christmas party.

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Posted: 11th, April 2010 | In: Key Posts, TV & Radio | Comment


Hull Beats Alexander Guttenplan In University Challenge Final You Didn’t See

THE final of University Challenge 2010 and boy wonder Alexander Guttenplan –captain of Emmanuel College, Cambridge – is up before Jeremy Paxman – know all.

Gail Trimble guest stars.

Hull reacts…

Note: In the version broadcast after much editing and such, Guttenplan’s Emmanuel College beat St John’s College, Oxford 315-100, as the hero correctly answered the poser “Promis you won’t tell” with a nod…

N-note: The presenter said “good guess” after Guttenplan correctly answered a question about poet W. H. Auden. The student replied: “It wasn’t a guess.”

Posted: 9th, April 2010 | In: TV & Radio | Comment


Ricky Gervais Beats David Cameron In Christian O’Connell Radio Vote

RICKY Gervais and Christian O’Connell present Simon Cowell, from Wildlife Aid, with a cheque after Ricky won the most votes on the ‘Who’s calling Christian?’ slot on Absolute radio. Says Ricky Gervais: “Beating David Cameron [who came second in the poll of 60 celebs and names] was the important thing. If he can’t beat me, how’s he going to beat Gordon Brown? I’m made up that I’ve won, now I don’t have to enter Britain’s Got Talent or I’m a Celebrity.” Nto that Gordon Brown entered the race, he rather expected to win by default, as democracy dictates…

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Ricky Gervais and Christian O'Connell present Simon Cowell, from Wildlife Aid, with a cheque after Ricky won the most votes on the 'Who's calling Christian?' slot on Absolute radio.

Posted: 8th, April 2010 | In: TV & Radio | Comment


The Intenet Conspiracy – Is It Real? A Video

DOES the Internet really exist or is it all just a conspiracy? “Join us in this quest for justice and truth where facts and fiction will meet each other on an epic battle in the name of journalism.”

Posted: 7th, April 2010 | In: TV & Radio | Comment


In Pictures: Dhruv Baker Wins BBC MasterChef 2010

DHRUV Baker is the winner of MasterChef 2010, the addictive BBC TV show in which amateur chefs (how can it be MasterChef if they’re amateurs? Discuss.) try to impress professional telly eaters John Torode and Gregg Wallace with stone cold food congealed under arc lights. Dhruv beat Tim Kinnaird, a man who looked uncannily like a pleading beagle, and Alex Rushmer, a kind of rolled out Jenson Button with ColdPlay hair and sex appeal, to the big metal and paste ‘M”. Here’s Dhruv in pictures at home with his wife Aileen and son Arunat.

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STRICTLY EMBARGOED UNTIL 2100 HRS WEDNESDAY APRIL 7, 2010 Masterchef winner Dhruv Baker poses for photographs at his home in south London.

Posted: 7th, April 2010 | In: TV & Radio | Comments (2)


In Pictures: Chris Evans’ Snow Centre Breakfast Show Sporting Challenge

CHRIS Evans was at The Snow Centre in Hemel Hempstead, Hertfordshire, for one of his Friday Breakfast Show Sporting Challenges. This is radio you can see. Also there was Jonny Saunders, Chris Evans’ wife, Natasha Shishmanian and their son Noah. Chris will be showcasing ventriloquists all next week…

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Chris Evans during one of his Friday Breakfast Show Sporting Challenges at The Snow Centre in Hemel Hempstead, Hertfordshire.

Posted: 7th, April 2010 | In: TV & Radio | Comment


Lin Yu Chun Is The Next Whitney Houston Is Next Susan Boyle

LIN Yu Chun is the next Whitney Houston. And he’s the nest Susan Boyle. chances are that Lin Yu Chun is the nexy Amy Winehouse, Lady Gaga and, with that hair, Ann Widdecombe.

Lin Yu Chun is the one.

Posted: 7th, April 2010 | In: TV & Radio | Comment (1)


Pilipinas Got Talent: Reggie Ramirez Has Endless Love

REGGIE Ramirez performs Endless Love on Pilipinas Got Talent. The Philippines is not all about extreme Easter (NSFW pictures) and him (Mr Ed was right!). It’s about love…

Posted: 5th, April 2010 | In: TV & Radio | Comment


Dr Who: Matt Smith Lookalikes And Alan Clark

DR Who is back. The fans get Matt Smith. And Anorak sees traces of Richard D Zanuck with a dash of Alan Clark. Who does he look like? Smith looks and sounds far more extraterrestrial than David Tennant, who always looked like he was acting and wanted you to know it, too. Your ideas please as to whom Matt Smith looks like… And then work out why Tom Baker changed into any of them?

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Dr Alan Clark

Posted: 3rd, April 2010 | In: TV & Radio | Comment


Claudio Montuori Is Today’s Musical Interlude

CLAUDIO Montuori introduces the musical interlude of the day. In Lisbon, Portugal, Claudio Montuori is waiting to be discovered. Spike Jones – eat yer heart out. Ladies and germs, Mr Claudio Montuori…

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Posted: 2nd, April 2010 | In: TV & Radio | Comment


Sophie Dahl’s Eton Whores And 9/11 Cricket

SOPHIE Dahl hs written Miss Dahl’s Voluptuous Delights. It’s a cook book to go with her cooking show. The Telegraph digests and features Dahl in conversation:

She wasn’t inhibited by having a celebrated literary grandfather, Roald Dahl, from writing her own books…

She’s made of solid stuff. But not of her food is:

Too much rosewater in the rhubarb Eton mess, she warns, produces an effect “like walking into a bordello”.

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Posted: 1st, April 2010 | In: TV & Radio | Comment


BBC Radio 5 Live’s Nicky Campbell’s Epic Hunting Fail

BBC Radio 5 Live’s Mr Nicky Nicky Campbell is objective in his views on hunting and any breaking of hunting laws. Listeners, we deliver Mr Nicky Campbell:

nicki campbell 5 live

Posted: 1st, April 2010 | In: TV & Radio | Comment


England To Play China At Cricket, Live Grenades Ready

LISTEN up, cowboy. In today’s National Service Training Video we tell you how to toss a grenade. You toss a grenade..? Yes, you, madam, in the England whites and hooked hands. Yes, that’s right, you toss a grenade “far”.

In this video a Chinese soldiers tosses his grenade into the bunker wall. Problem is that he’s stood in the bunker.

Expect more such film in the coming months as China the world that it’s not all police brutality and weird growths and disgusting X-Rays:

Posted: 1st, April 2010 | In: TV & Radio | Comment


Beyonce’s Single Lady Sparks Car Devastation

EVERYONE wants to be a Single Lady with Beyonce. “You can be a Single Lady if you want.” So says Mum. Mummy knows best. Mums have been creating single ladies for eons. Daddy wants more from his son. Shiloh Pitt understands.

Posted: 1st, April 2010 | In: TV & Radio | Comment


Miodrag Gidra Stojanovic Beats Tiger Woods To Serbian Push Up Title

MOVE over Tiger Woods, make way for Miodrag Gidra Stojanovic. He holds the world record for ‘Serbian Push Ups”. Miodrag Gidra Stojanovic can thrust 50 in 10 seconds and 29,449 in 24 hours:

Posted: 1st, April 2010 | In: TV & Radio | Comment (1)


Pain: A Video Study

WHO needs Wayne Rooney to stamp on your goolies when you can make you own entertainment? Not that game lad:

Spotter: AttuWorld

Posted: 31st, March 2010 | In: TV & Radio | Comment


What The Daily Mail Sounds Like: A Song By Dan And Dan

EVER wonder what the Daily Mail sounds like? Anorak always thought it was the clack of marmalade-coated tongue hitting the roof of the Arkela’s mouth. What does spite and fear sound like? Surrey? It turns out it also sounds like Dan and Dan:

Posted: 30th, March 2010 | In: TV & Radio | Comment


ITV Fighting Robot Show Imitates The Simpsons

A NEW ITV game show in the pipeline will feature contestants doing battle with big fighting robots.

The Daily Miror says ITV America president Paul Buccieri “absolutely fell in love with the show”. Says he:

“We are talking giant, massive robots that you control. It’s every kid’s dream.”

And also the 2D reality of Dan Greaney and Allen Glazier who wrote an episode of The Simpsons back in 2004. In I, (Annoyed Grunt)-Bot.

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Posted: 29th, March 2010 | In: TV & Radio | Comment


Over The Rainbow Puts Graham Norton’s Bums On Seats

OVER The Rainbow is the TV talent show that’ll pick a winner to play Dorothy in a West End version of the Wizard of Oz from 20 hopefuls. This follows the success of the BBC’s other Lloyd Weber advertorials, a search for Oliver Twist (I’d Watch Anything) and a search for The Sound Of Music renegade nun (No Way To Stop It).

Now we can spend lots of weekends with Lloyd Webber. But the entire purpose of the thing is not to provide free publicity for Lloyd Webber, nor to allow the proles to glimpse live theatre without paying £50 for the privilege – and that’s just the parking. The entire purpose is to give Graham Norton the chance to follow up his line “You can still be Nancy” with “You can still be Dorothy”.

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Posted: 27th, March 2010 | In: TV & Radio | Comment


On Russia’s Version of QVC The Old Blade Sharpener Demonstration Fail

ON Russia’s version of QVC – QVCCCP – the wonderful Blade Sharpener Demonstration Fail is the go. Look on in wonder as with theses scissor sharpeners not only do you get a handy gadget but you ALSO get a man to switch the old crappy scissors for a new pair of blades that actually work.

Posted: 27th, March 2010 | In: TV & Radio | Comment


In Pictures: The Bill Is Killed Off After 25 Years Of Reality Policing

ITV has decided to axe The Bill, the show that used to show a fictional version of life in a police station and turned into a turgid soap where former EastEnders‘ jobbers went to go through the motions. It was supposed to reflect the copper’s life but with no sign of nicking celebs, it became far-fetched.

Ok, a few stars were showcased: Keira Knightley, in 1995, played Sheena Rose, a ten-yar-old with nicked coins; James McAvoy; David Walliams; knife criminal Sean Bean; Paul O’Grady played a transvestite; Kathy Burke was kidnapped; Chesney Hawkes sang.

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Posted: 26th, March 2010 | In: TV & Radio | Comment


Finnish Morning News Anchor Kirsi Alm-Siira Presents…

THE week’s news round-up is brought to you by Finnish morning news anchor Kirsi Alm-Siira.

Vid Spotter: The Daily Wh.at

Posted: 26th, March 2010 | In: TV & Radio | Comment


Meow Meow The Panda Bear Goes Nuts

TODAY’S polar bear news is hijacked by Meow Meow the angry panda. Once pandas where the big bears on the news agenda. Then the polar bears started sitting on ice and melting it to make them look small and hopeless.

The media lapped it up and the pandas were shafted. One a brighter note, with less gawping, the pandas have been shagging like Jesse James at a Tiger Woods pro-priest invitational and there are now millions perhaps billions of them.

Posted: 26th, March 2010 | In: TV & Radio | Comment


Florizel Street: 50 Years Of Coronation Street Gets Its Own Show

FABULOUS tale in tonight’s Manchester Evening News of the struggle writer Tony Warren had to convince Granada Television his brainchild Coronation Street was a good idea.

The bosses at Granada were not at all keen and the original title Florizel Street almost had the series flushed like the similarly-named toilet cleaner.

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Posted: 25th, March 2010 | In: TV & Radio | Comments (4)