TV & Radio Category
Television and radio programme reviews, trailers, highlights, twilights and cinema news. Also the neglected gems from years past.
Barry George Does Big Brother
BELOW the news that Barry George is “quitting Britain”, the Daily Star reports on Big Brother: “LUKE MY STORY – YES BEX – YES I WANT SEX”.
George may realise that attracting a mate requires something more sophisticated than stalking, such as announcing it via a national newspaper.
Look out for wannabe stalkers strapping on sandwich boards bearing the legend “I AM HUNTING YOU” and waiting for women to wander past.
In an exclusive, tell-all interview with the Daily Star Sunday, the Luke Marsden, Big Brother housemate emeritus, “confessed how he… can’t wait to ply her with booze and have his wicked way…”
Readers might wonder if this is an extract from George’s dairies or a D-list celeb telling all?
See if you can guess whose saying the following lines, George or Marsden:
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Posted: 3rd, August 2008 | In: Tabloids, TV & Radio | Comments (3)
Carol Voderman And The Market For Celebrity Talent
CAROL Vorderman is worth what the market can stand:
But between them, Vorderman and the TV station have proved there is a market in talent – a fact the BBC’s trustees failed to grasp in their report on stars’ pay in June 2008. They concluded that performers like Jonathan Ross are not paid more than the market rate – even though the BBC won the auction for him by outbidding rivals.
The trustees did not realise that with so few buyers of talent (and C4 now proving it cannot bid with the big boys) the BBC is the market. And it did not realise that an employer creates the value of its stars by giving them formats and exposure – just as Channel 4 created much of Miss Vorderman’s value.
The Countdown experience should teach the BBC that wages go down as well as up. It is a lesson for boardrooms too.
The celebrity league table.
More Vorderman
Posted: 2nd, August 2008 | In: Celebrities, Money, TV & Radio | Comments (2)
That Official Big Brother 9 News In Full
BIG Brother 9 Watch: Anorak’s looks at Big Brother news in the media…
The Dail Star is the “Official Big Brother Paper”. It knows the ins and the outs of life in the house.
Fans fear there is a plot to keep geeky Luke in the house.
Viewers hoping to evict a wannabe tonight are in for a shock because the phone lines have already closed… The majority believe that is why chiefs are trying to fix the poll to stop the skinny student from being evicted.
GEEKY Luke Marsden was last night hoping for a hot reunion with busty Bex Shiner after he was booted out of the house.
The plot thickens…
Posted: 2nd, August 2008 | In: Tabloids, TV & Radio | Comment
Not Jill Dando’s Killer Barry George And Tabloid TV BBC
BARRY George has had his conviction for the murder of BBC TV presenter Jill Dando quashed on appeal. He has been in prison for eight years.
Says Mr George: “I want to thank my family, my legal team, my medical team and all the people who have supported me at Belmarsh, Whitemoor and Manchester prisons, and all my supporters.”
On the BBC 10 o’clock news, this was the lead story. And twice during the feature Mr George was called an “oddball”.
Anorak cannot help but think of libelled Robert Murat, called an “oddball” by the tabloid press in its obsession with the Madeleine McCann case. He’s the Mail’s “oddball“.
Farmer Joaquim Marques was also called an “oddball” by the Daily Mirror. The Sun saw another Madeleine McCann “oddball” in a photofit.
Mick Donovan, who was allegedly found in the company of missing schoolgirl Shannon Matthews, was the Sun’s “oddball“.
Michael Jackson has been the Star’s “oddball“.
Lembit Opik, the MP, has been a Mail on Sunday “oddball“.
When did the BBC become tabloid TV?
Posted: 1st, August 2008 | In: Tabloids, TV & Radio | Comments (12)
Sports Quote Of The Day: Steve Cram’s Olympics
SPORTS Quote of the day: BBC athletics nodding head Steve Cram
“Martyn Rooney is always sometimes guilty of not committing occasionally”
And he’s off…
Posted: 1st, August 2008 | In: Back pages, TV & Radio | Comment
Big Brother 9: Mute Maysoon’s April Rains
BIG Brother 9 Watch: Anorak’s looks at Big Brother news in the media…
MAYSOON, everybody. It’s the Big Brother housemate (emeritus) who sounds like a patois greeting in April. It’s Big Brother’s May-soooooon…
Hats off to Big Brother for following the arrival of its first disabled housemate, the blind sighted Mikey, with the mute Maysoon.
So much for tokenism.
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Posted: 1st, August 2008 | In: Tabloids, TV & Radio | Comment
Do The Licence Payer: BBC Fined, And Elisa Roche Auditions For Countdown
IT would not surprise us to learn that Pudsey Bear, BBC Children In Need’s overstuffed monocular mascot, has 20-20 vision.
The BBC has been fined £400,000 for “deliberately cheating” the public with fake phone-in competitions. The BBC is funded by the public, meaning that we have been cheating ourselves. And that is not on!
Right it is then that we should pay, and the Beeb has been censured.
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Posted: 31st, July 2008 | In: Money, Tabloids, TV & Radio | Comments (3)
Acting Up A Storm: Coronation Street Cops Beaten Black And Blue
“BACKLASH over Coronation Street’s girl-on-girl gang violence storyline,” screams the Mail.
Coronation Street is show scenes of two fictional characters – policewomen Mel Morton and Abi Sharpe – being beaten up by a troupe of actresses.
The Mail is appalled.
“But after almost five decades on air, Coronation Street is set to deliver its biggest shock yet with gratuitous scenes of girl-on-girl gang violence.”
There are four large colour stills of the “gratuitous violence” on the Mail’s website. View them at your own risk.
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Posted: 31st, July 2008 | In: Tabloids, TV & Radio | Comment (1)
Do The Numbers: More Countdown Auditions, With The Telegraph And BBC
AUDITIONS for the person to replace Carol Vorderman as the nation’s favourite TV brain box move on to day 4:
Vorderman, who is reported to earn in the region of £900,000 a year from the show, announced she was leaving on Friday.
Vorderman’s agent said on Saturday that the star felt forced to step down from the show when she was told to take a 90% pay cut from a salary understood to be in the region of £1m.
NICOLE MARTIN (Telegraph)
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Posted: 31st, July 2008 | In: Broadsheets, Celebrities, Money, TV & Radio | Comments (4)
Madeleine McCann: The McCanns’ Ireland State Visit And Coronation Street Plots
MADDIE WATCH – Anorak’s at-a-glance guide to press coverage of Madeleine McCann, Kate McCann, Gerry McCann
BELFAST TELEGRAPH: “Madeleine McCann parents set for Irish visit”
Has the missing child been spotted in Ireland?
The couple and their young twins are expected to make the journey this autumn and plan to make a television appearance while they’re in the country. The couple’s visit will be their first time to arrive in Ireland since their four-year-old daughter Madeleine went missing last year.
This reads like a visit from a head of state:
Kate and Gerry are expected to take up on an open invitation to appear on RTE’s The Late Late Show to address the nation and thank the Irish for their “incredible support”.
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Posted: 31st, July 2008 | In: Madeleine McCann, Tabloids, TV & Radio | Comments (569)
Do The Sums: More Countdown Auditions, With The Guardian
AUDITIONS for the person to replace Carol Vorderman as the nation’s favourite TV brain box move on to day 3: The Guardian:
HEIDI BLAKE (Guardian)
So, farewell then, Carol Vorderman. Following 26 years of co-hosting Channel 4’s flagship gameshow, the woman recently dubbed “Mrs Countdown” is set to take her final bow after reportedly being given 48 hours to accept a 90% cut to her £1.2m pay packet or resign
ZOE WILLIAMS (Guardian)
But to return to that 90% – as any true maths fan would – that was a cut from 800 grand, so it would have left her with £80k.
LEIGH HOLMWOOD (Guardian)
Previous reports put her salary between £900,000 and £1m a year.
Posted: 30th, July 2008 | In: Broadsheets, Money, TV & Radio | Comments (2)
Big Brother 9: The Premier League Plot
BIG Brother 9 Watch: Anorak’s looks at Big Brother news in the media…
NEWS on the Star’s cover page that seven “BIG BROTHER FIXERS TO FACE BOOT”.
The Star has learned of a “sensational secret-code plot to fix the show”.
Anorak has been replaying old tapes, alongside watching the live feed, and can confirm that the code involves the angle of Rex’s parting, the tone and duration of Mohamed’s grapsing and the number of times Lisa blinks in any given hour.
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Posted: 30th, July 2008 | In: Tabloids, TV & Radio | Comment
Reclaim The Streets From New York Cyclists
CYCLISTS in New York. Cycle at your own risk:
As Anroak’s Man In NY says:
According to Gawker (via Gothamist and the NYT’s City Room) the cyclist was arrested while the cop has been put on “modified assignment” pending an investigation. Though what on earth the poor guy on the bike could have been doing to warrant this kind of treatment beats me.
He was cyclist. Get them before they get you:
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Posted: 29th, July 2008 | In: TV & Radio | Comments (4)
Do The Time: More Countdown Auditions, With Joey Barton
MORE auditions for Carol Vorderman’s former job as the nation’s favourite brain box, featuring Joey Barton…
STEVE WILSON (Telegraph)
Barton was bought from Manchester City just a year ago for £5 million and is on wages that amount to around £70,000 a week.
ROB STEWART (Telegraph)
Newcastle midfielder Joey Barton will refuse to accept a cut in his £55,000-per-week basic wages when he meets the club’s hierarchy for crucial talks on Tyneside following his release from prison.
PATRICK MULCHRONE (Mirror):
Three in five want the £60,000- a-week former England player sacked, a poll has shown. The row has seen some refuse to renew season tickets.
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Posted: 29th, July 2008 | In: Back pages, Money, Tabloids, TV & Radio | Comment
Do The Math: Those Countdown Auditions, With Sara Nathan And Abi Titmuss
AUDITIONS are well underway for the woman to replace Carol Vorderman as the nation’s favourite brain box.
SARA NATHAN (Sun):
GLAM girl Abi Titmuss was greeted with a queue of four men for the launch of her new book today
SARA NATHAN (SUN)
Just three men turned up to have her sign The Secret Diaries Of Abigail Titmuss at London’s Liverpool Street station.
Do the math…
Posted: 29th, July 2008 | In: Tabloids, TV & Radio | Comments (6)
Carol Vorderman Takes Stars From the Bottom
CAROL Vorderman has taken one from the bottom and Countdown is bereft of a sum meister and letter turner.
While the talk is of equipping one of Bruce Forsyth’s Dolly Dealer’s with a calculator, the Mirror says “Star back axed Carol”.
The stars backing Carol are:
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Posted: 29th, July 2008 | In: Celebrities, Tabloids, TV & Radio | Comments (2)
Big Brother 9: Bully For Rachel Rice And Hitler
BIG Brother 9 Watch: Anorak’s looks at Big Brother news in the media…
BIG BROTHER is embroiled in a new “BULLY ROW”.
Oh, for those innocent days, when we sat in our Big Brother hides, looking on for sings of talent and under-the-duvet breeding. Now the twitching is all about the bitching, and news is that Welsh bird Rachel Rice is on the receiving end.
“You’re a liar and sell out,” says Rex to Rachel.
Yeah, that’s bullying. You can keep your kebab shop shankings and tag-team happy slapping. What worse is there than callings someone fake?
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Posted: 29th, July 2008 | In: Tabloids, TV & Radio | Comments (9)
If Britain Did Charity Balloon Releases
BLOW up the balloons. Release the balloons. Make the orphans in Bristol smile…
Spotter: Fiona
Posted: 28th, July 2008 | In: TV & Radio | Comment (1)
Countdown Carol Voderman Is 11 Per Cent Less Attractive Than Myleene Klass
“COUNTDOWN MELTDOWN,” says the Mirror. “Shocking truth of how Carol and Des were FORCED to quit.”
News was, and still is, that Vorderman was offered a 90 per cent pay cut in her £800,000 salary to keep her job as celebrity sums worker outer on the Channel 4 show. She was offended, appalled and RAGED OUT.
Anorak has enjoyed Carol’s work over the years and can that she has been treated unfairly, being as she is only 79 per cent less attractive then she was when her last pay deal was set.
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Posted: 28th, July 2008 | In: Celebrities, Money, Tabloids, TV & Radio | Comments (12)
Britain’s Got Talent Dog Dies On Stage
IN Anorak’s soon-to-be-bestseller book ‘I Was A Mail Order Tabloid Whore”, Old Mr Anorak recalls the prefect tabloid story with which he made his name. And it goes like this:
A SNOOKER-playing dog who won fame on Wir Fahren Gegen Engelland has been accidentally mown down and KILLED by his owner.
Now imagine his surprise when he opened the Sun and learned:
A SNOOKER-playing dog who won fame on Britain’s Got Talent has been accidentally mown down and KILLED by his owner.
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Posted: 27th, July 2008 | In: Celebrities, Tabloids, TV & Radio | Comments (4)
Carol Voderman’s Countdown Erect Join
CAROL Voderman (surely Phwaorderman? – Ed) has left her job as sum solver–in-residence on TV’s Countdown.
Now read on as the Daily Mirror’s front page screams: “HM ELLY OVRN ESCKIGA”.
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Posted: 27th, July 2008 | In: Celebrities, Tabloids, TV & Radio | Comments (18)
Farewell Zezi Ifore: Big Brother 9 Presenter Evicted
BIG Brother 9 Watch: Anorak’s looks at Big Brother news in the media…
FAREWELL Zezi Ifore, Big Brother’s Little Brother presenter.
No longer will you be live-ish in the Big Brother studio, but pre-recorded and only live on Sundays.
You showed us all that presenting can be a vocation, requiring presence, humour, delivery, style, vim and substance.
The students at Anorak’s Department Of Learning Entertainment (DOLE) thank you.
Posted: 26th, July 2008 | In: TV & Radio | Comments (6)
Big Brother 9: Kathreya Kasisopa Love You Engrish
BIG Brother 9 Watch: Anorak’s looks at Big Brother news in the media…
IT’S Big Brother’s Kathreya Kasisopa. And the Sun says she has a “secret ex-husband nearly 30 YEARS her senior”.
It’s a tabloid secret, a nugget of information the Sun has unearthed by fearless journalism and asking, “Have you ever been married?”
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Posted: 26th, July 2008 | In: Tabloids, TV & Radio | Comments (2)
Kate Garraway Interviews Madonna’s Brother
OVERHEARD On TV: GMTV’S – Kate Garraway interviews Madonna’s brother Christopher Ciccone
KG: “Would you marry Madonna?”
CC: “No”
KG: “Why not?”
CC: “Because she’s my sister”
Research…
Posted: 25th, July 2008 | In: Celebrities, TV & Radio | Comments (5)
Big Brother 9: Luke Marsden IS Sexually Active
BIG Brother 9 Watch: Anorak’s looks at Big Brother news in the media…
ANORAK is not in the least bit surprised to learn that Big Brother’s Luke Marsden is a “LOVE CHEAT” and a “sex-hungry stud”.
Having watched the show, Luke’s bedding technique is rooted in a plan to bore the female into a sense of catatonia and then pounce, or at least sidle over and play a tickling game.
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Posted: 25th, July 2008 | In: Tabloids, TV & Radio | Comments (5)
