Anorak | Sandwich Spread

Sandwich Spread

by | 29th, March 2004

‘CHARLIE Stubbs is a busy boy: not only is he the only builder in Weatherfield, he’s also set himself up as some sort of charity for desperate, deranged women.

‘I don’t want him!’ ‘Neither do I!’

In fact, so busy is Charlie that he’s had to farm out some of his ‘work’ to his assistant Jason.

Charlie and Jason had gone round to a Mrs Fanshaw’s to do some work on her plumbing, quite literally as it turns out. “I’ve bought you a special biscuit,” she purred to Jason, “and then afterwards I’d like you to come upstairs and take at look at the springs on my bed.”

Jason couldn’t believe his luck and afterwards went straight to The Rovers to brag. “She even offered to make me a sandwich as well,” he said. “She always does,” replied Charlie.

Charlie’s now turned his attention from Bev to her daughter Shelly, pouncing on her in the back room of The Rovers. “We mustn’t,” she told Charlie. “What about me mam?” Surprisingly he didn’t add: “Don’t worry love, I’ve already seen to her.”

Shelly is clearly having a bit of a mental patch (lack of pies?) as not only has she fallen for the world’s smarmiest builder, she’s also got herself demoted from manageress of The Rovers to barmaid after throwing an impromptu and illegal after-hours lock-in.

Fred happened to look out of his window to see the lights in The Rovers blazing and a drunken Penny King and Mike staggering out at midnight.

Fred – who was still waiting for a reply from his marriage proposal to Penny – didn’t take too kindly to this and vented his anger on Shelly who discovered to her cost that hell hath no fury like a butcher scorned.

Fred Elliott has nothing on Karen McDonald, however, when it comes to fury. The woman is a

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Posted: 29th, March 2004 | In: Strange But True Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed: RSS 2.0 | TrackBack | Permalink