We bring you the chic and unique, the best and most bizarre shopping offers both online and offline. We offer you tips on where to buy, and some of the less mainstream and crazy, individual and offbeat items on the internet. Anything that can be bought and sold can be featured here. And we love showcasing the best and worst art and design.
A bloke one revealed that NORWICH was not his favourite football team, but an acronym he’d send his wife. The other liberty he’d take was to have the leading ‘N’ stand for’ Knickers’. As you try to work out the code, you might like to cook up of of your or just spell the entire message and stick it to your fridge with these fantastic fridge magnets featuring Joseph Apoux’s Erotic Alphabet of 1880.
Flashbak has fine range of merchandise featuring the racy letters, including prints for each letter (perfect for the smallest room), and a great set of stickers. And these magnets are every bit as good. You can buy the full 26 letters on three economical sheets, or each letter as an individual magnet in a choice of three sizes.
Mark “WEISSGUY” Weiss is a world-renowned photographer who has traveled the globe photographing music legends from Van Halen, Ozzy Osbourne, Debbie Harry, The Clash, Prince, Queen, The Ramones, Aerosmith, and Mötley Crüe to Metallica, Guns N’ Roses, Bon Jovi, and KISS. Weiss’s images capture the artists onstage, backstage and behind the scenes. His images are now available to buy at the brilliant Flashbak Prints Shop.
He visually documented historic events including the US Festival, Live Aid, the Moscow Music Peace Festival, and the PMRC hearings in Washington, DC. His photographs have been published in thousands of magazines worldwide, and he is responsible for two of the era’s defining album covers, Bon Jovi’s Slippery When Wet and Twisted Sister’s Stay Hungry. His inimitable photographs helped craft the visual imagery of rock and metal in the 1980s.
Growing up in Matawan, New Jersey, Mark made a deal with a neighbor at thirteen years old to mow his lawn for the summer in exchange for a 35mm camera. He then filled his teenage nights sneaking into concerts to shoot the biggest acts of the ’70s. After being arrested for selling photographs outside a KISS concert in 1977, he walked into the offices of Circus with his portfolio and soon landed his first centerfold spread – a photo of Aerosmith’s Steven Tyler. Soon after, he became the publication’s staff photographer.
Buy the prints her – you can get the signed by Mrs or unsigned. Either way the quality is outstanding.
The marketing blurb for Inspired Luxury Escapes is tempting: book your “escape” to Krakow. There’s booze, sausages and the world’s No.1 Nazi death camp:
As the Christmas period approaches, Krakow transforms into a captivating winter wonderland. With the Old Town’s medieval streets providing the backdrop, wander 80 market stalls picking up unusual decorations while sampling traditional Polish dishes. Not to mention everyone’s favourite festive tipple – mulled wine. Included in our special offer is a tour of Auschwitz-Birkenau, the most notorious Nazi concentration camps.
Mulled wine and so much more than the more humdrum Nazi death camps advertised on other Christmas escapes:
Its a “great way to get into the Christmas spirit”:
Book now to ensure disappointment in the depravity of humankind.
Hold the satsuma. Stocking fillers come no fruitier than this collection of stickers featuring all 26 letters of Joseph Apoux’s Erotic Alphabet of 1880. A single print of the French artist’s ‘Alphabet pornographique’ and the A-Z as individual wall art are available as prints on fine art paper. But to customise a skateboard, laptop or book, the stickers are the tops.
The entire sheet measures 14inches square, and individual stickers are just over 5cm square. Two of the prints below give you an idea of how the designs appear as in the flesh. Global shipping is on offer. So you can send them as a gift to anyone anywhere.
Stuck for a housewarming gift, anniversary pressie or something to put in the downstairs loo to entertain the guests? Don’t be. You can buy Jospeh Apoux’s fabulous Erotic Alphabet of 1880 as a poster and study all 26 letters as individual prints. Buy two prints to represent the happy couple’s initials, perhaps; three for the ménage à trois; and lots for the orgy (bulk deals available on request).
All the letters are printed on the most gorgeous fine art paper using the best inks.
Give them the gift that keeps on giving. See the whole range here.
If you would like to spell out a word, name, slogan or whatever on a T-shirt, bag, card or print, please get in touch here:
Say ‘FUCK 2020’ with these great T-shirts from the always brilliant Flashbak. There are also cards and a great Tote bag featuring Santa Claus with a Handgun by Will Crawford, created way back in 1912. Our pick is the T-shirt. The unisex T-shirt’s come in black and a large range of colours.
Did you see the books arranged behind Prime Minister Boris Johnson at Castle Rock school in Coalville, Leicestershire. Was the school librarian making a point in their choice of books to backdrop Boris? Titles on the top shelf included: Betrayed, The Resistance, The Subtle Knife, Fahrenheit 451, The Toll, Oliver Twist and Terry Pratchett’s genius Guards! Guards! What could it all mean asked the assembled hacks. “No comment,” said the school, which is, of course, a comment.
“Books seen behind Boris Johnson tell their own story,” says the Guardian headline. “Has a savvy school librarian or English teacher snatched a golden opportunity to have a pop at the PM in front of the nation?” asks a reporter from the TES. “Are the books behind Boris artfully arranged with a secret political agenda and commentary on the current government?” mused the Indy.
What you might not also have noticed is the PM’s words on the exams results fiasco. “I’m afraid your grades were almost derailed by a mutant algorithm,” guffed Boris. “I know how stressful that must have been for pupils up and down the country. I’m very, very glad that it has finally been sorted out.”
That mutant algorithm was coded by human beings. Sally Collier, the head of England’s exams regulator Ofqual has resigned. Jonathan Slater, the most senior civil servant in the Department for Education (DfE), is ‘stepping down’. But Gavin Williamson, the Secretary of State for Education, aka The Mutant, remains. Look for codes and symbols of defiance by all means, but in so doing try not to miss the obvious. Nearly 800 libraries have closed since 2010. Johnson holidayed amid the exam disaster-class, popping up to tell us that he was reading Lucretius’s On the Nature of Things.
Johnson, that school librarian and political pundits dialling in opinions from seats positioned in front of their bookshelves – watching on for signs of wrong-thinking by their peers and enemies – all assure us that books matter. But schoolchildren suffer through the lack of books and formal education. The local library has gone and there’s no longer a free space to sit, read the think. Books have been reduced to props. And that is telling.
You can buy a Covid-19 Plush toy and snuggle up to a stuffed effigy of the virus that has killed and contributed to the untimely deaths of thousands of people.
Somebody wrote the following:
It’s quite incredible (and mildly terrifying!) how a bunch of tiny microbes can have such a profound impact on the world.
You’ve been trying your very best to avoid it for the last few months, but now you can get your well-sanitised hands on COVID-19 – in cuddly plush form!
As you search the web for a cancer cuddly or an ebola action figure, another company says a small percentage of money raised from sales of the cuddly Covid-19 plus toy will go to “charities supporting healthcare workers who need essential supplies, vulnerable families who need care and children who are losing healthy meals due to school closings.”
As nurses and doctors snuggle up to the thing that might kill them at work – and the sane wonder why you didn’t just give all the money to charity – you can know that the Covid-19 toy is made in China – just like the real thing!
Says no-one: ‘Where can I get Covid-1 to 18 and complete the set?’
Sunglasses should only be worn indoors by professional gamblers, prisoners, Jack Nicholson, Z-listers who wants to be noticed, hungover international cricketers and anyone who understands the risk of being mistaken for Bono. Sunglasses make elderly women look like assassins and elderly men look shifty, especially if they’re wearing a dog collar and / or talking to children. This is how you wear glasses and look the business. It’s about style and need in harmony. And if you want to look sharp and not pay over-the-odds for shades, you can do so at our pals Smart Buy Sunglasses. They offer free shipping and 100-day returns.
Madeleine McCann: a look at repotting on the missing child. In the stead of any news on the hunt for the missing child, the Daily Express gawps at the parents. News is that Gerry McCann had an ‘image fixed indelibly’ in his memory from less than an hour before his daughter disappeared”. This was “revealed during a book written by the parents on the missing toddler”. First up, dear Daily Express: get a sub-editor. Yesterday’s garbled news form Reach plc titles (the Express, Star and Mirror) was riddled with typos and literals.
The scoop is that Kate McCann wrote something in her book, Madeleine: Our Daughter’s Disappearance and the Continuing Search for Her. That book was published in 2011. The Express has taken 9 years to tell its readers what was “revealed in it”.
Here’s the extract – “the heartbreaking account of Gerry’s final memory of seeing his daughter”:
“Madeleine was lying there on her left-hand side, her legs under the covers, in exactly the same position as we’d left her. For Gerry, this became one of those images I described earlier, pictures that fix themselves indelibly, almost photographically, in the memory. He paused for a couple of seconds to look at Madeleine and thought to himself, she’s so beautiful. After pulling the bedroom door to, restoring it to its original angle, he went to the bathroom before leaving the apartment.”
As the Express reads old books to ‘reveal’ nothing new, the Mirror looks at Christian Bruckner, the convicted German peadophile and rapist accused of kidnapping and murdering Madeleine McCann, a claim he denies. The headline is a sort of anti-news:
Madeleine McCann suspect Christian Brueckner ruled out of raping and murdering girl, 11
Claudia Ruf was kidnapped from Grevenbroich, Germany, in 1996, while walking her neighbour’s dog – before her partly burned body was found dumped around 40 miles away
A police spokesman told German newspaper Bild: “After comparing the information obtained, it can be said that Christian B was not in Grevenbroich at the time in the case of Claudia Ruf. In addition, a DNA comparison is said to have been negative.”
Are we now at the point where every unsolved case of child abduction and murder is to cross-checked with Christian Brueckner’s life? Good to look but why now – why not check him before? It all looks a b it ike PR, as if the police having pointe the finger at the revolting Brueckner are desperate to keep his name in the frame. This might be in hope that someone who knows something comes forward. But right now the is only circumstantial evidence linking Brueckner to the worlds most famous missing child. And in light of any evidence saying he committed a crime against her, we should presume he did not.
The brilliant Flashbak art prints shop has a great collection of work by Walker Evans (November 3, 1903 – April 10, 1975). Evans was an American photographer and photojournalist best known for his work for the Farm Security Administration (FSA) documenting the effects of the Great Depression. Much of Evans’s work from the FSA period uses the large-format, 8×10-inch (200×250 mm) view camera. He said that his goal as a photographer was to make pictures that are “literate, authoritative, transcendent”.
Walker Evans set the tone for the American documentary movement of the 1930s and for street photographers of the 1940s and 50s.
See the great Flashbak art prints shop here.
We’re a service that prints images onto protective face masks. Whether it’s a replication of your own face or your favorite meme, we care about the details. Our masks are sure to make people around you do double-takes and have a brighter day.
Spotter: Danielle Baskin@djbaskin
Against all odds after unfortunate experiences with some bad actors & pandemic related delays, we are now able to offer cool DEVO stuff to any spud who might want it. In addition to the masks and classic T’s we have a spiffy, clear plastic, DEVO PPS Shield that is designed to attach easily to the DEVO Energy Dome to protect you from invisible microbes and unwanted bodily fluids. Stay safe in devolved style!
Wear one and feel cosmic energy vibrate thought your body”
It was designed according to ancient ziggurat mound proportions used in votive worship. Like the mounds, it collects energy and recirculates it. In this case, the Dome collects the Orgone energy* that escapes from the crown of the human head and pushes it back into the Medulla Oblongata for increased mental energy.
Word on twitter is that these are the 20 books people are most likely to lie about having read.
A friend once worked for a record industry bigwig who used to read the pass notes and then pretend he’d read the book. He did it in the hope it’d impress women. He was an utter bellend, of course. And it was enjoyable watching him founder when he met someone who’d actually read War And Peace.
When they invented prime ministers, they also created Prime Ministers’ children. Unlike the SADDOS (sons and daughters of stars) who can mime, pose and pout in their instagram branded knickers as they work on their celebrity status, the politicians’ kids can either join the Party or find their own way. Carol Thatcher went into Golliwogs, for her brother Mark it was Africa, and Euan Blair went into the boozer and then vomited over Leicester Square. Lara Walker-Johnson went to Oxfordshire and bought a Prada headband. We know all about her purchase because Laura wrote about for Vogue magazine in a story entitled How Time-travelling To My Teen Wardrobe Helped Me Understand Who I Am Today. It’s the kind of vapid tosh made to reassure the unconvinced that minted toff Meghan Markle’s editing of the expensive magazine that advertises expensive things was not a seismic moment in race relations.
“I’m trying my best not to buy more clothes right now, uncertain about future financial prospects and conscious it isn’t the time to splurge,” says Lara in Oxfordshire. The posh always name the county they’re visiting not the village or town. A town has windows, public transport and numbered doors. A county has sprawling mansions, bridle paths and land. “But, I must confess, I did buy two headbands,” she adds, “one black and fluffy, from Shrimps, and one pink and from Prada – that I’ve been drooling over for months.”
The critics some fast. “Lara who, according to her website, is a fashion writer,” snipes one writer, adding: “I have no idea what her future financial prospects are, but her recent accessories acquisitions make me think that she’ll be okay.” The mind boggles to think what the backstory will do to the bands’ resale value. “In a moment when economic inequality, globally, and in the U.K., has never been more conspicuous – and when so many peoples’ lives are in her father’s hands – I might have kept this confession to myself.”
Two headbands in and Boris Johnson is King Herod.
In the Daily Mirror, Lara’s purchases are given no lesser importance: “Meanwhile, more than 100 NHS and care staff have died after testing positive for COVID-19 – as keyworkers beg the government for more vital PPE to protect themselves on the frontline.”
Meanwhile is the literary split screen. There’s Lara shopping online for fancy goods and a fashion philosophy while below her the huddled masses look up beseechingly and wonder if all this coverage of to-die-for Prada headbands means Lara will never need buy one again, and if they make face masks?
If they think you need it, the UK government send you a care package to keep you eating in the coronavirus crisis. The contents are:
1 loaf of white sliced bread
1 bag of apples
1 bag of small oranges
1 bag of potatoes
2 cartons of long life milk
1 roll of toilet tissue
2 tins of cooked peas
1 tin of hotdogs
3 tins of tomato soup
1 can of tuna
1 packet of porridge oats
1 tin of peaches
1 pouch of teabags
1 bag dried pasta
1 tin of chopped tomatoes
1 packet of digestive biscuits
2 tins of backed beans
1 pouch of dried coffee
2 jars of pasta sauce
1 vial of shampoo
1 bar of soap
Lots of us got the Government’s letter telling us to stay indoors for at least 12 weeks and protect the NHS. Amy Allen had updated the missive with a a few rounds of Cards Against Humanity, “a party game for horrible people”. The game simple: “Each round, one player asks a question from a black card, and everyone else answers with their funniest white card.”
Spotter: Amy Allen
Like many of you, I grew up reading MAD magazine and enjoying the famed getting lampooned. Mort Drucker drew much of the magazine’s best artwork. He died this week aged 91. Why did he draw? Because he had to. As he put it: “My mother told me that when the doctor was delivering me I did a caricature of him on my way out.”
Why not use your free time to paint a picture, write the great American tweet or build a Squirrel Picnic Table and Bench?
To cut a record, you simply play audio through an aux cable and lift the cutting arm onto a blank disc. Once the record is cut, you can instantly play back your recording through the tone arm and the in built speaker!
More like cute your own records — look at how wee this thing is:
Harvard Egyptologist Peter Der Manuelian takes us to ancient Giza and round the Sphinx and Pyramids in this video. “You’ll see we’ve had to remove modern structures and excavators, debris dumps,” says Peter Der Manuelian. “We studied the Nile, and we had to move it much closer to the Giza pyramids, because in antiquity, the Nile did flow closer. And we’ve tried to rebuild each and every structure.”
Spotter: The Kid Should See This
Hermann Göring wrote the forward to a puppy training manual you can buy on Amazon. Sections are not dedicated to knowing Jews by their scent, teaching your dog to raise a front right leg and going vegetarian. There is, however, lots about obeying orders. The JC reports that shopper Lorraine Phipps bought the Puppy Training manual from Amazon unaware that it contains a eulogy on Adolf Hitler printed inside, namely Adolf Hitler, 1931-1935: Pictures from the Life of the Führer with a forward by Hermann Göring.
“I bought a purported puppy training book from Amazon on March 2,” says Lorraine. “When my husband and I went to read it, despite the cover being as expected, it was actually a reprinting of a 1936 pro-Nazi propaganda book.” She wants Amazon to remove the “awful and misleading item from their listings”. Amazon says they are “investigating”.
Elsewhere you can buy Pictures from the Life of the Führer – without the Puppy Training cover. It is “one of the crowning popular propaganda achievements which helped consolidate Hitler’s hold on power, this book had sold millions of copies by 1940 and was one of those specifically ordered destroyed by the Allied occupation forces after 1945”.
Meanwhile… Somewhere in a German bunker a Nazi is teaching other recreational Herrenvolk to ‘Stay’, ‘Beg’ and ‘Play Dead’.
Stuck for a good book to read as the coronavirus spread makes staying in doors obligatory? Don’t be. This is a great reading list compiled by Ernest Hemingway. As Paul Gallagher writes at Flashbak:
In 1934, Arnold Samuelson read Ernest Hemingway’s short story One Trip Across. It inspired the 22-year-old student to travel across America and seek out the author. He wanted to ask Hemingway for his advice on how best to write.
Samuelson had just finished a course in journalism at the University of Minnesota. He harboured ambitions to be a writer. Packing a bag, he hitch-hiked his way down to Hemingway’s home in Key West. When he arrived, he found the place, like the rest of America, in the grip of the Great Depression. He spent his first night sleeping rough on a dock. During the night, he was woken by a cop who invited Samuelson to sleep in the local jail. He accepted the offer. The next day, feeling refreshed, Samuelson ventured out in the sun to search for his hero’s home.
When I knocked on the front door of Ernest Hemingway’s house in Key West, he came out and stood squarely in front of me, squinty with annoyance, waiting for me to speak. I had nothing to say. I couldn’t recall a word of my prepared speech. He was a big man, tall, narrow-hipped, wide-shouldered, and he stood with his feet spread apart, his arms hanging at his sides. He was crouched forward slightly with his weight on his toes, in the instinctive poise of a fighter ready to hit.
The full list is at Flashbak. But my pick would be… Well, I don’t know. I need to read them all. It’s a cracking list.