Anorak | Pan Handler

Pan Handler

by | 8th, June 2004

‘REVENGE is a dish best served cold.

The culprit is believed to have adopted a particularly horrible disguise

And if you’re trainee chef Edwina Currie, it’s best prepared in a selection of copper pots and pans of the type favoured by celebrity cook Gordon Ramsay.

And that’s lucky since as a memento of her time in TV’s Hell’s Kitchen, the Sun hears the former Tory minister admit to walking off with a selection of kitchen goods.

‘Al and I had a quick natter,’ says Edwina, taking care to implicate fellow wannabe cook Al Murray in her plan, ‘and said, ‘If you were taking one thing out of Hell’s Kitchen what would you take?’

‘I said, ‘Well, I’ll take some copper pans’ and that’s what I arrived home with.’

And that makes Currie a villain which is no surprise to those of us who read in the Mail that, of all the social groups, the middle classes (of which Currie is undeniably a member) are the most prone to lawbreaking.

‘Britain is in the grip of a £14bn crimewave,’ thunders the Mail. ‘But it’s not murderers, rapists, muggers and burglars we have to fear.’

It isn’t? Then who is it? Gypsies? Black men in cars? Foreigners? Magpies?

No, dear reader, the scourge of the decent are those dastardly middle classes, people like the light-fingered Currie.

Researchers for TV Licensing questioned 2,000 people divided evenly across the social classes as to what so-called petty crimes they had

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Posted: 8th, June 2004 | In: Tabloids Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed: RSS 2.0 | TrackBack | Permalink