She Wants To Be Alone

‘AN open letter to Kerry Katona-McPadding-Katona.

Now open your mouth and say ‘Ahhhhhh!!!’

Dear Kerry,

We are happy if you are happy, Kerry. Your joy at being a celebrity mum is our joy. When you won I’m A Celebrity… we dared to dream that the crown would one day make you our Queen proper.

So when you speak out, as OK! says you have, and say ‘I’M HAPPY IN ISOLATION’, we are happy that you are in isolation.

But not everyone can leave you alone. The oxygen of publicity is OK!’s lifeblood, and so the magazine has news from the Meadows Clinic in Arizona, where you are dealing with your depression.

You might well stick your tongue out at them, Kerry, as might we, but you are the consummate professional and allow them to invade your hard-fought privacy with their flashy propelling pens and cameras.

We hear you when you say how the staff have spent several days chatting to you about your depression, listened as you poured your heart out to them, as you went back to your earliest memories as a child.

The staff there are good and loyal, Kerry. They never revealed any of the innermost thoughts of the place’s alumni, like Whitney Houston, Michael Barrymore and Paul Gascoigne.

And now look at them. Or, rather don’t. Stay focused on your self, and know that you are in our thoughts, and the pages of OK!.

And that your reputation is intact and indeed being burnished by your PR Max Clifford.

As Max tells us: ‘Obviously it all stems from her early years. What they are tying to do at the clinic is to rebuild her, strip it all down to the very beginning…’

They are deconstructing you, Kerry, taking you down to your raw essence, seeking the kernel of undiluted talent that lurks deep, deep, deep within.

You chose wisely to go to the States. Max tells us that you are ‘happy with that isolation. You can totally open yourself up without thinking that everyone is watching you. There you can be ‘anonymous’.

So get well soon, Kerry. And do tell us all about it in minute detail when you return…’

Posted: 25th, July 2005 | In: Reviews Comment | TrackBack | Permalink