Anorak

Anorak | 10 Ridiculous (But Awesome) Horror Movie Tag-Lines of the 1980s

10 Ridiculous (But Awesome) Horror Movie Tag-Lines of the 1980s

by | 30th, June 2014

     80tagline9

 

IF the Seventies proved a fertile time for imaginative horror filmmakers, the 1980s very much represented a new age of plenty, a span wherein every idea that had worked in a movie once before was hauled out a second, third and sometimes fourth time.

And because of the home video revolution and VHS technology, new filmmakers had the opportunity to get their movies seen by more eyes than ever before.

In terms of the decade’s horror then, there was more of everything to enjoy: more slasher films, more Jaws films, and more holiday-themed horrors too.

And once again the marketers writing copy for horror movie posters broached the unenviable task of selling films that otherwise might not have merited audience attention if judged by quality alone.  Sometimes, a great tag-line could still fill a theater, or make the difference at a rental store counter.

So without further prologue here are ten ridiculous and yet utterly brilliant horror movie taglines from the 1980s, the great decade of excess:

 

 

 

Beyond Evil (1980): “You’ve made your bed. Now die in it.”

 

80tag1

 

This film starring John Saxon has nothing to do with beds and nothing to do with dying in them.

 

 

 

Blood Beach (1980): “Just when you thought it was safe to go back in the water, you can’t get to it.”

 

80tagline11

 

This tag-line for Blood Beach (also starring John Saxon…) is a great twist on the Jaws (1978) tag-line and a funny inversion on it as well.  Here the water is safe, the sand deadly.  Too bad the movie is really terrible…

 

 

 

Final Exam (1981): “Some may pass the test…God help the rest.”

 

80tagline2

 

And just think, this was before the Common Core curriculum.

 

 

Basket Case (1982): “The tenant in room 7 is very small, very twisted, and very mad.”

 

80tagline10

 

And he’s not Johnny Depp, either.

 

 

Pieces (1983): “You don’t have to go to Texas for a chainsaw massacre.”

 

80tagline8

 

Gee, what famous horror movie title could this tag-line be referring to?

 

 

Spasms (1983): “You scream. You expand. You explode.”

 

80tagline3

 

I know MSG is bad for you, but really…

 

 

Don’t Open Till Christmas (1984): “T’was the night before Christmas, and all through the house, not a creature was stirring…they were all dead.”

 

80tagline4

 

Because the 1980s needed another Christmas-themed horror film as a companion piece to Silent Night, Deadly Night (1984)…

 

 

Ghoulies (1985): “They’ll get you in the end.”

 

80tagline7 

 

 

 

The Housekeeper (1985): “She cooks. She cleans. She kills.”

 

80tagline5

 

Who says good help is hard to find?

 

 

 

Maniac Cop (1988): “You have the Right to Remain Silent…Forever.”

 

80tagline6

 

Still one of the greatest horror movie tag-lines ever…



Posted: 30th, June 2014 | In: Film, Flashback, Key Posts Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed: RSS 2.0 | TrackBack | Permalink

Related posts

Added: Friday 27th June 2014 • Views: 1
12 Vintage TV Publicity Photos That Must Be Seen
Added: Thursday 26th June 2014 • Views: 559
The 5 Greatest Episodes of Buck Rogers in the 25th Century (1979 - 1981)
Added: Thursday 26th June 2014 • Views:
Drive the Chicks Wild! Vintage Menswear Adverts
Added: Monday 23rd June 2014 • Views:
10 Reasons Aerobics In The 1980s Was Crazy Awesome
Added: Friday 20th June 2014 • Views:
'The Same Animals…Only Functioning Less Perfectly:' The Five Most Underrated George A. Romero Movies
Added: Friday 13th June 2014 • Views: 1
Loads Of Women Running From Houses: The Gothic Romance Paperback