A Christmas Turkey

‘AS turkeys go, few come bigger than Swept Away, the film directed by Guy Ritchie, starring Madonna and The Bernard Matthews Players.

The bat’s not the only wooden thing in this scene

But there’s a bigger flightless bird on its way and its name is Revolver.

In a real departure for Ritchie, the Mirror says that his latest movie will be a gangster caper set in the East End of London.

We are not at liberty to reveal too much about it, but it stars Jason Statham, an actor with a range so shallow that even Mrs Ritchie will not look out of her depth alongside him.

To save her further embarrassment, the entire film is set in a carpenter’s yard near Epping Forest.

For once, the most wooden thing in the film may not be Madonna…’

Posted: 13th, December 2004 | In: Tabloids Comment | TrackBack | Permalink