It’s Behind You
‘PANTO season has come early to Coronation Street – in the past week weve had men in drag (Bet/Liz), over-the-top villains (Cecils son Philip), and unlikely heroes (yer man Jim McDonald).
| ”Here! I’ve only used it a couple of times” |
And thats to say nothing of a plot so implausible even Baywatch would reject it.
To recap, Jim had broken out of prison to find Liz because he didnt trust her and thought she was having an affair. With the help of Steve and Karen, he found her and she managed to convince him that she wasnt having an affair (even though she actually had).
Jim and Liz decided to run away together to America via Northern Ireland in a stolen speedboat but would you believe it they happened to bump into Ashley, Claire and Joshua who were also in a speedboat and were drowning.
Well have to turn back, Jim, cried Liz, more concerned about what the salt water was doing to her hair then anything else. Oh well! said Jim. It was good while it lasted, Liz. No Jim, trust us, it wasnt.
Jim was led away in handcuffs while Liz went off to Brighton to start a new life with Bet. As the other half of a drag act no doubt.
Bet was suffering from heartache of her own as her fiancé, Cecil Newton, had died at the altar, just as he was about to marry her. He was probably envisioning his wedding night and realised he was better off dead.
Ashley and Claire have got Christmas Wedding written all over them though. They returned to Weatherfield after their Blackpool trip noticeably closer. People will be thinking were a couple, laughed Ashley nervously.
Poor Ashley is still caught up in the memory of dead wife Maxine. Let her go Ash! Shes moved onto bigger and better things, love, not least a series of adverts for Asda.
Dev-id Essex has also got a new lady in his life Maya, the lawyer who put the solicit into solicitor. Maya has revealed that shes not the together career woman Dev thought she was by getting fired for having an affair with a married client. She then revealed that she had thousands of pounds worth of debts.
Dev took it all in his stride however. Get dressed, he told her. Youre moving in with me.
Award for loony of the week though has to go to Brenda Ferns. Brenda is playing an increasingly large and unstable part in the lives of Bethany, Sarah Lou and Todd.
Sarah let Brenda take Bethany home for the night, where she proceeded to tell the two-year-old some very interesting bedtime stories. And all the fornicators and the liars will burn in the hell fires of damnation forever, she read before kissing her granddaughter goodnight on the cheek.
Brenda forgot to take Bethany home the next day and when she did finally turn up she launched into a tirade against the filth and sin that her grand daughter was being subjected to, living with an unmarried couple.
Sarah Lou threw her out of the house and so Brendas developed a very nice line in lurking around corners, a la Tricky Dickie.
Poor Sarah Lous set to get another nasty surprise later this week too when she discovers that shes pregnant. Again. To paraphrase Oscar Wilde: To get pregnant by accident once is a misfortune, have it happen twice and you should get yourself on Trisha.’
Posted: 3rd, December 2003 | In: Strange But True Comment | TrackBack | Permalink
