Anorak

Anorak | Charley Works The Block With Big Brother’s Brian

Charley Works The Block With Big Brother’s Brian

by | 19th, June 2007

charley-brian.jpgINTRODUCING Kerry Blake, lapdancer and former work mate to Big Brother’s hare-raising harridan Charley Uchea.

Kerry feels duty bound to tell Star readers about Charley’s “VICE SECRET”, specifically how the wannabe Wag “posed” as a prostitute and asked “club punters” £500 a time for sex.

Charley failed to realise that lapdacing is a hands-off experience, the aim being to get inadequate, drink–softened middle managers aroused enough to return home full of apparent lust for their significant others.

But in “£500-A–NIGHT CHARLEY” we hear of Charley teasing men by offering to go to bed with them in exchange for cash.

Having seen Charley in action, this tease sounds more like a threat, extracting money with menaces. And we are unsurprised to learn of an audience member offering her £300 to go away.

“No-one seemed to fancy her that much because of her big mouth,” says Kerry, who has known Charley since she was 10. “So she was desperate for anyone to like her.”

We who have watched Charley for the past 21 days wonder if Kerry has ever met Charley, and if as they rubbed ice cubes down one another’s cleavages they exchanged so much as “How do you do?”.

The Charley we know is desperate to be in a row. She seeks out argument like a greyhound seeks out her hair.

Charley’s tactic is to create a frenzy of screaming antagonism before stomping off to the garden in her Yeti boots.

But it seems that some did like Charley, fancy her even. Kerry says Charley worked a scam where she’d agree to have sex with punters so long as they paid up first. They had to wait outside the club in the street.

If you can’t see what’ coming next, you are either a grown man less streetwise than Dora the Explorer or a sticky-fingered adolescent saving up hard to catch up with the class lothario who’s been at it since he was 14.

“I hang out with celebrities. I go to the best parties. I go to the best parties with the stars,” says Charley. “You name them, I’ve met them. But I’m still Charley from the block.”

Or as Brian puts it: “More like Charley’s been round the block.”

Brian to win at 9-1 with your free bet. Learn how to place the bet here.



Posted: 19th, June 2007 | In: Celebrities Comment (1) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed: RSS 2.0 | TrackBack | Permalink