Fattening Up On Victoria Beckham’s Slim Pickings

“I DON’T CARE IF I’M FAT,” says Victoria Beckham.

And it that’s not enough: “OUR CAR BOOT SALE, MY NEW TV ROLE & PLAYING DOMINOES WITH DEMI MOORE & ASHTON.”

To think that once we masticated on who was Posher – Rebecca Loos, Peterborough United FC (‘The Posh’) or Beckham? La Beckham is know so common that the old debate is akin to working out which Royal is the more useful, Prince Edward or Prince Andrew.

Before we get to Posh, though, OK! announces: “Victoria Beckham is going to be a mum!”
We could interject and say that Posh is already a mum, chiefly to Brooklyn, Romeo and Cruz. But to step in and quell the fires of joyous news is rude and common, so we remain mute.

On listening further it turns out that “OK!’s very own soothsayer, Sally Morgan, believes” Posh will get pregnant some time in the future.

Posh may even be pregnant right now. Today! OK! says her Poshness is “fuller in the face”. Posh, it turns out, has “relaxed” her diet of steamed fish and vegetables in favour of bulking up on a diet of brown rice, breach and beans.

Again we hesitate to interrupt. We could argue which is more fattening, diet A or diet A1? But we have still to work out if Anthea Turner or Vanessa Felt would make the better paperweight.

Or, indeed, if Her Poshness would. As the newly hefty Posh says: “If you’re pregnant and you don’t eat then your baby won’t get the goodness. I don’t care if I’m fat.”

More brown rice and to hell with the consequences!

And if the dish repeats – just as OK! repeats the aforesaid quote Posh made in her book Learning To Fly as a front-page headline – hang that too…

Anorak

Posted: 23rd, January 2008 | In: Celebrities, Posh and Becks Comment (1) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed: RSS 2.0 | TrackBack | Permalink