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Car Crash TV With Jeremy Kyle And Death

by | 23rd, July 2008

“JEREMY KYLE CHEATS DEATH,” screams the Mirror’s front-page headline.

You can just see Kyle standing before Death and yelling at him to “Be a man! Do the job properly – NO more cheating – NO more lies – NO stuff ups. If you ARE Death then start behaving like Death!

“Let’s get God on the show, everybody.”

God emerges wagging a finger calling Death “pafetic” and demanding a DNA test to prove once and for all that “Def is cheatin’ lyin’, free-loadin’ scumbag”.

Witnesses said the ITV talk show host was “shaking like a leaf” after his chauffeur-driven BMW saloon collided with a Mazda sports car in the outside lane of the A1. Mazda MX3 driver Darren Shannon, who scrambled uninjured from his upside-down car, said: “Jeremy was just sitting on the verge looking really shocked. He wouldn’t say a word. He must have been in shock.”

Time to bring on our resident therapist… Graham, everybody.

Says Kyle: “If there is one thing you think you can rely on it’s Death. Right, everybody? But NO! He let me down.”

“BE… A… MAN…”



Posted: 23rd, July 2008 | In: Celebrities, Tabloids, TV & Radio Comments (25) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed: RSS 2.0 | TrackBack | Permalink