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Lady Gaga Says Bondage Makes You Gay

by | 13th, August 2009
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gaga-2LADY Gaga is naked on the cover of OUT magazine. Jimmy Savile lookalike (pictured) Gaga will do anything to stop you looking at her face. Or her penis. Yes, dear reader, the web is rife with rumours that Lady Gaga is a hermaphrodite, or a drag act, or one of the Lady Boys of Bangkok.

So long as you don’t look at her face, you can say what you like about Madonna’s camel.

If Gaga was in the UK, we’d have hundreds of pictures of her face. The UK has 20 pet cent of the world’s CCTV. The only place Gaga’s face would not be seen would be on BBC3 or the House of Lords, and Ladies.

Says Gaga:

“I very much want to inject gay culture into the mainstream. It’s not an underground tool for me. It’s my whole life. So I always sort of joke that the real motivation is to just turn the world gay.”

jimmy_sav_micTo turn the world gay, Gaga poses nude with a skeleton, appears wrapped head-to-toe in bondage bandages, and languishes in a coffin smoking a ciggie.

This is how you become gay and make the world gay. Gay-a is turned. Gayness can be undone by stopping doing any one of these things. And stop drinking frog spawn. And she’s still talking:

“I’ve become really fascinated with fantasy and monster movies of the ’50s.”

Fascinated with fantasy. Thrilled by thrillerzzz. Horrified by horror. Mystified by mystery… Gaga is called Gaga for a reason. She writes all her own jokes:

“Somehow I feel, socially, after a war or after something really bad happens there’s a rebirth of naiveté, so that’s where my obsession comes from. That’s when the fame monster is born.”

You need naivete to buy into the Gaga legend. Pictures:



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Posted: 13th, August 2009 | In: Celebrities Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed: RSS 2.0 | TrackBack | Permalink