Vatican Possessed By Harry Potter Says Pope’s Chief Exorcist

TO promote his book Memoirs of an Exorcist, Father Gabriele Amorth – Chief Vatican exorcist in residence – says The Devil is in Vatican.

The Devil is most likely disguised as priests dressed in a black cassock and white dog collar. The Devil is thought to enjoy the company of small boys whom he shags and then makes promise not to tell or else all the other demons will want a turn or else the child who made him do it will burn for all eternity. Or else!

Says the Father, there are possessed “cardinals who do not believe in Jesus and bishops who are linked to the demon”.

What’s more he thinks the Harry Potter books are crap, saying they are dangerous because they failed to draw a clear distinction between “the Satanic art” of black magic and benevolent white magic.

His book is much better and anyone who says its isn’t is possessed and in need of a stiff exorcising with a hard rod of justice…

Image: Sabrina Frowiss, left, receives an exorcism because she ate too much tofurkey by “The Rev.” Tex B. Acon during Bacon Camp, an open source meeting for bacon lovers in San Francisco, California, March 21, 2009.

Anorak

Posted: 11th, March 2010 | In: News Comments (5) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed: RSS 2.0 | TrackBack | Permalink