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Tiger Woods Sells Mattresses In India

by | 9th, February 2011

TIGER Woods is selling mattresses in India. Tiger uses a Shivam “deep sleep” mattresses, to have ruby dreams about two-dimensional white women and a man with a handicam and microphone.

Does Tiger dream of women and a man in Comfi-Slax who oversees all his doings, offering a running commentary, thick-voiced tribute, occasional whoops and screams of “In The Hole”? Does Tiger want to be caught on camera?

Or does Tiger have dead-eyed dreamless sleep, exhausted by rubber-insulated sex with rubber-inlaid women and the energy-sapping texting?

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Posted: 9th, February 2011 | In: Sports Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed: RSS 2.0 | TrackBack | Permalink