Dog the Bounty Hunter denied glorious British TV appearance because of some poxy murder
BRITISH television has been denied the appearance of glorious be-mulleted thunderberk, Dog the Bounty Hunter because of a little ol’ murder. Duane ‘Dog’ Chapman was apparently all set for an appearance on Celebrity Big Brother (yes, it would appear that this is a show that is still being aired, remarkably), but stupid suits put the scuppers on it and denied him a UK visa thanks to his conviction for a harmless murder in 1976.
The Seventies were a different time. Everyone was murdering each other back then weren’t they? But no, immigration swine stopped him and his tremendous mane from being locked in a house to go slightly mad over a series of televised weeks.
HOW DARE THEY?
You’re probably wondering what kind of murder Dog took part in. Well, he was convicted for the murder of Jerry Oliver in Pampa, Texas, after Oliver was shot dead by one of Chapman’s companions during a pot deal gone wrong. Apparently, Chapman was waiting in a vehicle at the time, yet he was still found guilty and got sent down for five years in prison before being released after 18 months.
Anyway, since then, Dog the Bounty Hunter had a series that ran for eight seasons where he fought crime and gave street-love to felons, accompanied by his children and his impressive wife (complete with hairspray in holsters).
So, he’s basically a modern day superhero/wrestler hybrid with a tremendous haircut who saves the day. With dubious views on dropping the N word. Who helped someone get murdered. But still. THE HAIR!
Britain has been denied the only thing that would drag it out of a post-Olympic slump.