Katie Price is bored of being married… AGAIN
WHEN straight people talk about gay-marriage, they’re often keen to bring up how marriage is a sacred thing. The sanctity of marriage shouldn’t be sullied by those gay people. They sometimes argue that it’ll be humans marrying dogs next!
However, undermining straighties arguments about the sanctity of marriage, almost single handed, is Katie Price. She’s got a phenomenal record when it comes to making a mockery of getting wed.
When she’s not dressed up like a meringue and singing ‘A Whole New World’, or shacking up with Alex Reid (the most troubling man in history), she’s… well… getting bored of her new husband Kieran Hayler.
After just 11 days.
The Artist Formerly Known As Jordan has been married or shacked-up with so many people that, thanks to desensitization, chances are you had no idea she even had a new fella, let alone put a ring on it. However, she massively did, tying the knot with male stripper Hayler in the Caribbean on January 17th.
The pair only confirmed their engagement four days prior to the ceremony. Honestly. If she carries on, marriage as a whole will be as respected as the time Dale Winton pretended to wed Nell McAndrew.
“Katie is already getting bored with Kieran,” a source told the Sunday People. “She does this every single time – she says she’s in love, she rushes to the altar and then things go wrong.”
“It’s only a matter of time until this is over. Katie has already said she doesn’t think it will last which makes a mockery of getting married in the first place. Nobody around her can understand why she has done this, it is ridiculous.”
Price has, of course, played the wounded wanker card, saying: “It’s only my third one. As usual, I get a hard time for my choices because I’m me – I still don’t really understand why. This is only my third marriage. I did my own Pricey Marriage Survey and discovered I was in good company. Joan Collins has been married five times, Liz Taylor did eight and Zsa Zsa Gabor nine.”
Yeah. And those two aren’t batshit mental are they? Still, Katie Price must love wedding cake a whole lot. Someone tell her she can buy and eat one while wearing a ludicrous gown without, y’know, ACTUALLY getting hitched.
Meanwhile: Elton John and David Furnish have been together for a million years.