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Panicky Groom Jailed For Wedding Bomb Hoax

by | 22nd, October 2013

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WOMEN who say ‘all men are pigs’ or ‘men are stupid’ want following around with a machine that makes an irritating noise for the rest of their lives.

However, some men really don’t help.

Take for example, the bridegroom who has been jailed for a year after staging a bomb hoax on his wedding day to try to prevent his bride finding out that he’d failed to complete the paperwork required for them to marry.

Stupid Neil McArdle had forgotten to fill in the legal forms but couldn’t face telling his fiancee, Amy Williams, because the wedding was “all she talked about”.

So, Neil did what anyone would do. While she got ready for the big day, he popped out of the house, went to a phone box and disguised his voice before ringing Liverpool register office and said: “This is not a hoax call. There’s a bomb in St George’s Hall and it will go off in 45 minutes.”

This was a mere 11 days after the Boston marathon bombing in the US.

The building was evacuated and the emergency services called. Now, if this was a pointless prank in poor taste, our Neil would’ve got away with it. However, he turned up at the registry office with all the family while the area swarmed with police.

Later, after the building was checked, the staff tried to help with the “delayed” ceremony and soon found out that there was no booking.  Everyone started to smell a rat and Williams’s sister was overheard telling a flustered McArdle: “You probably done the bomb scare yourself.”

McArdle was arrested the same day and defined the very definition of ‘bungling’.

Derek Jones, prosecuting, said: “He realised the day before the wedding was not going to take place and because he did not want to let his fiancee down or [he was too] embarrassed to tell his family, he panicked in the morning and rang St George’s Hall. He was hoping all weddings would be postponed and it would give him time to book the wedding in the future. He did say several times how embarrassed and ashamed he was and how sorry he was.”

Charles Lander, defending, told the court: “If it was not so serious, the facts of this case have all the markings of a comedy.”

The judge Norman Wright prattled on, but did say: “You did not say ‘we need to talk’. You tried to weasel your way out,” before handing him 12 months in jail and fining him.

Jesus wept.



Posted: 22nd, October 2013 | In: News Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed: RSS 2.0 | TrackBack | Permalink