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Britain’s Got Talent: Kerry-Anne Boyle Is The Heiry Angel

THE new Susan Boyle is not Janey Cutler – the new SuBo is Kerry-Anne Boyle. Kerry-Anne is Boyle’s second cousin, albeit one she has never met.

The Mail’s Paul Revoir commands his readers:

Forget SuBo, meet TwoBo! Now Susan’s cousin stuns Britain’s Got Talent judges

“Stuns” soon becomes:

Kerry-Anne’s performance of Sting’s Fields Of Gold received a somewhat mixed response from the judges.

So, not stuns, then. Here gaping eyebrow wrangler and up the ‘Maidenhead’ shagger Amanda Holden:

“It is clearly genetic, you’ve got the Boyle factor.”

Translation: You’re fat and ordinary, like Susan Boyle, yet have made it onto the telly.

Says Piers Morgan:

“It was an incredibly good performance.”

Translation: You’re fat and ordinary and can still remember the words to a song.

Simon Cowell, without whom the show would be dire, says:

“I think that without the connection with Susan there wouldn’t really be much interest to be honest.”

But, still, she’s through…

Posted: 10th, May 2010 | In: TV & Radio | Comment