Anorak News | Kour Blimey!

Kour Blimey!

by | 14th, October 2003

‘BY rights, this morning’s story that Anna Kournikova has hung up her tennis racket and tight adidas shorts and retired from the sport belongs on the back pages.

Doctors never got to the bottom of Anna’s injury problems

After all, she has been for many years a stalwart of the game, winning the odd point here and there in a career that has brought her untold riches and, er, zero singles titles.

But such is the sense of shock both inside tennis and outside that her decision makes not only the news pages but even the front page of both the Sun and the Star.

“Game, Sex ‘n’ Match,” says the Star headline – a reference, we understand, to the game that made Anna famous. Or rather that Anna made famous.

And, as if to illustrate the point, the paper delves into its picture library and manages to fish out a picture of the Russian beauty seemingly involved in said sport.

The photo itself is a little grainy, but on close inspection an object with a remarkable similarity to a tennis ball is visible (although there is admittedly no tennis racket in shot).

Happily though it is surrounded by half a dozen pictures of the 22-year-old in more familiar surroundings – dressed up to the nines at various parties and award ceremonies.

And tennis fans will be happy to hear that they haven’t seen the last of Anna – she is planning a new career in television.

“Acting and presenting are definitely things I enjoy doing,” she told the paper. “I get offered lots of these jobs but I’ve never had time to pursue them because of my tennis.”

Indeed, such are the demands of modern day tennis that it is a wonder that Anna has managed to fit anything else in her life over the past few years.

In some seasons, she has racked up an incredible THREE or FOUR hours on court, much of it spent running around and watching balls fly past her.

The Sun has captured some of those moments for its front-page retrospective – and retrospective it is in the most literal sense of the word as the paper focuses exclusively on Anna’s derriere.

“The End Of A Rearer,” proclaims its headline, as the paper serves up “a volley of unbeatable shots” of the “tennis totty”.

Why is it that – even after all these bum shots – we feel that we haven’t seen the back of her?’

Posted: 14th, October 2003 | In: Tabloids Comment | TrackBack | Permalink