Anorak News | Crash! Bang! Wallop!

Crash! Bang! Wallop!

by | 10th, December 2003

‘AT first glance, it might appear that England rugby’s kicking machine Jonny Wilkinson and Black Sabbath bat-eater Ozzy Osbourne have little in common.

Jonny’s all smiles after hearing that Daniel Hyde is all right

But the tabloids make strange bed-fellows and here they are sharing this morning’s front pages after both being involved in car smashes.

The Sun shows Ozzy’s wife Sharon fighting back tears as she lands in the UK to be at the bedside of her husband, who was badly hurt in a quad bike accident.

The 55-year-old rocker suffered cracked vertebra in his neck, eight broken ribs and a smashed collarbone after the crash, which happened (according to the Star) while he was ”larking about” for the cameras.

The Sun says Sharon and daughter Kelly spent several hours with Ozzy, although he couldn’t communicate with them because he was on a ventilator.

And a doctor said recovery would take time: ”His progress is going to be slow and I don’t expect any major changes for 24 hours.”

Anyone who has watched the MTV documentary The Osbournes might be forgiven for thinking ‘No change there’.

And no change with Jonny Wilkinson, who was back in training with club Newcastle just hours after cheating death in a 70mph car crash.

”Miracle!” proclaims the Mirror, adding, ”but then again it WAS Jonny”.

Of course, it won’t surprise anyone to learn that it wasn’t Jonny at the wheel of the car when it went off the road near Catterick and hit a tree.

Indeed, had it been the 24-year-old obsessive driving, there is no doubt that he would still be out on the A1 now practising taking the corner over and over again.

A couple of weeks ago, a rugby player being involved in a minor car crash would barely have rated a paragraph in the papers, but these days we’re all rugger buggers.

And the Mirror is not the only paper desperate to remind us of the mortality of even our biggest stars.

”Three Big Stars…Three Lucky Escapes,” it says, above pictures of Ozzy, Jonny (and a car similar to the one that was involved in the crash) and, er, Daniel Hyde.

Daniel, of course, is such a big star that he needs no introduction, but for those of you who have been living on the moon for the past few years we can tell you he is the actor who plays bad boy Scott Anderson in the Channel 4 soap Hollyoaks.’

Posted: 10th, December 2003 | In: Tabloids Comment | TrackBack | Permalink