Anorak News | Boyfriend In A Coma

Boyfriend In A Coma

by | 19th, December 2003

‘THERE’S not much Christmas cheer going around in Weatherfield at the moment as an attempted murder plot finds Martin lying in a coma while his family squabble over his still warm body.

A nation mourns…

Martin almost paid the ultimate price for love this week as Katy’s younger brother Craig employed schoolboy logic to get rid of the aging Romeo.

“If Martin weren’t around, things could be like they were before, couldn’t they, Dad?” Craig asked his father.

Unfortunately, an alcoholic sacked mechanic who scrapes his knuckles on the floor as he walks really isn’t the best person to ask advice from.

“Have I told you how proud I am of you?” Tommy told Craig, “No? Well me dad never told me neither and it done me no harm.”

Craig has moved in with his dad, ostensibly as a protest against his mother, but in reality it’s to make sure his father doesn’t choke to death on his own vomit in the night.

Since getting fired from the garage, Tommy’s new job seems to be to try and out-drink George Best into an early grave. Craig thought that if Martin were to “disappear” then all his family problems would be over.

He’s clearly been watching too many episodes of The Sopranos, however, as he’s taken the term rather too literally by cutting Martin’s brake cables (which of course all well brought up Northern boys know how to do).

Craig panicked when he saw his sister get into the car and told his father what he’d done. Tommy jumped into his car and chased after them.

But Martin, seeing an irate alcoholic closing in on him in his rear view mirror, especially one who’d threatened to kill him just hours earlier, declined to stop.

Martin dropped Katy off to do some Christmas shopping and carried on his way to work, complete with ginger maniac on his tail at 80 miles an hour. Martin’s car plunged into a wall and Tommy only just managed to drag him to safety before the car exploded in a fireball.

By the time the ambulance arrived, Martin was in a coma (although to be fair it took people some time to realise as there’s actually very little difference). He was taken to Weatherfield General – the world’s smallest hospital, consisting of only one bed – and soon his bedside was surrounded by a Jerry Springer style collection of ex wives, girlfriends, step-children and in-laws.

David and Sarah Louise tried to get Katy removed from the ward on the grounds that she was “nothing to me dad,” but for once Gail acted almost like a reasonable human being and insisted that Katy stay.

Tommy and Craig meanwhile were taken to the police station to give a statement about what happened.

Tommy had persuaded his son to lie and say that they’d just happened to spot Martin’s brakes leaking fluid. Tommy may live to regret that decision, however, as later this week Katy goes to the police with her suspicions that her father deliberately tried to kill Martin.

And with a whole pub full of witnesses who heard Tommy telling Martin he was going to “get him,” it’s not looking too good.

Elsewhere on the Street, Dev is trying to persuade Maya to move in with him, having gone out for about three weeks – which in Soap Land is quite a long time.

Maya isn’t the cool, collected solicitor that Dev thinks she is though: she’s lost her job for sleeping with a client, is tens of thousands of pounds in debt and he later discovers that she’s also a shoplifter.

Sunita for one will be pleased when Dev discovers the truth, as she’s been getting more and more jealous of Maya. Which is not really the behaviour you’d expect from a woman due to get married in two weeks.

Ciaran too is showing less than enthusiasm for his trip down the aisle. Betty walked into the back room of the Rovers recently to discover Ciaran and Bev locked in a passionate embrace.

Well, I suppose Christmas is traditionally the time to help out the lonely elderly people.’

Posted: 19th, December 2003 | In: Strange But True Comment | TrackBack | Permalink